Clash of Champions 2000
Joey Styles and Jim Ross walk down the entrance ramp, and take their seats at the announcer’s booth.
JR: Welcome everyone to Extreme Wrestling Alliance’s Clash of the Champions, a capacity crowd are on there feet live here in the Kemper Arena ready for the best wrestling names in the business to get do–
Two teens walk down the entrance ramp, and Joey, and JR look at each other wondering what they are doing. The teens talk to them, and Styles and JR seem to be going crazy, the guys laugh and just wave as JR and Styles walk back up the ramp talking to themselves. The kids put on the headsets.
Mark: Damn they were getting on my nerves, for you who don’t know us, Im Mark and my partner in Crime is simply known as Rhino, much like that ECW crackhead, but much more deadly. We will be providing the commentary for now, if you don’t like it, tough crap. Lets get on with these matches.
Tag Team Title Match
KKK Vs. The Outsiders
“Straight Outta Compton” by NWA blares over the speakers, and Damu, Treach, and Malice head out into the entrance ramp, and raise the belts over their head. They walk in the ring, and wait, as a Wolfpack DX remix comes on. A howl is heard and Scott Hall and Kevin Nash come out. They rush into the ring and the bell sounds.
Mark: See now that is what I’m talking about, they just rush in and get straight to business. All four men are pounding on their respectful opponents with the Klan getting the upper-hand. See Rhino I told you, these guys are just the mack, that is why they are the tag team champs. Damu is in the ring with Nash now, both just towering over everything. They lock up, eye rake by Nash, toss in the ropes, reversal, ducked a clothesline, and MONSTER power slam by Damu. He stomps away at Nash and pins him, 1-no, too early to get a win this easy. Damu picks up Nash by the hair, and gives him a knife-edge chop. Kevin Nash comes back with one of his own, and another one by Damu, they are exchanging chops, Nash gets the advantage by kicking Damu in the stomach. He whips Damu into the ropes and a big boot to the face. Nash grabs Damu and wrenches his arm, and tags Hall. Hall and Nash whip Damu into the ropes, duck by Damu, into the ropes, and double clothesline, out of NO WHERE, all three men are down, but Damu has a lot of energy taken out of him. He struggled towards Treach, Hall gets up quickly and grabs Damu by his head, and gives him a head-butt. Cover 1-2…no kick-out by Damu. Rhino that is what I am talking about, you won’t get Damu down that easy. Hall….Hall is looking at us..(Hall hocks a loogie on Mark) Son of a bitch, this is a new shirt to! Wait Damu shoves Hall around spits in his face, and gives him a drop-kick to the outside. HELL YEAH, Malice walks over to the unaware hall, and picks him up….massive sidewalk slam! That will teach you Hall, spit in my face will you! Nash has a chair, Look out Malice…(Crowd roars in excitement) OH MY GOD, he nearly caved the back of Malice’s head. Nash helps up Hall and they plan out a strategy. Hall slides back in the ring, and Damu tags out to Treach. Treach comes out with a running clothesline. Nash gets in and receives a clothesline for his efforts. Treach picks up Hall and gives him a Side Russian Legsweep. Nash staggers up and Damu, comes off the top rope with a missile drop-kick that sends Nash flying out of the ring. Damu and Treach look at Hall and signal for the Death Row Drop! Come on hit that sorry bastard fo–No Mankind and the Big Show are coming out. Big Show slides in and punches Damu, and gives him the SHOW STOPPER, Mankind kicks Treach in the gut and gives him a double-arm DDT. They slide back out of the ring, come on ref DQ the Outsiders!
Rhino: ….He ain’t going to DQ them, this is the Extreme Wrestling Alliance, not some soft-core federation! Hall signals to the crowd, He grabs a groggy Treach, and gives him the Outsider’s Edge! Cover 1….2…3!!! The Outsiders have done it, wait Rob Van Dam is rushing to the ring, with a chair, the Outsiders grab the belts and ditch out of the ring. Rob is daring them to come in, Nash and Hall are mocking Van Dam. Rob helps up the 3 men, and they glare at the Outsiders.
Winners and NEW Tag Champs: The Outsiders
Mark: I can’t believe this! What was Mankind and that Jolly Green Retard doing out here? That was an incredible match. The next match is going to be for the TV Title, speaking of the devil. Here comes my main man Austin, now he is a true Champion.
Austin (c)w/Chyna Vs. Rob Van Dam w/ Fonzie
Glass shatters “B-B-Break it Down” DX’s music comes on, and the current EWA TV Champ, Stone Cold Steve Austin accompanied by the Ninth Wonder of the World walk down the entrance ramp. He steps in the ring and climbs on the turnbuckle, raising the belt and his fists. He hands the belt to the ring announcer as “Walk” comes on, and Rob walks down the entrance ramp, and points to himself as flares go off, Alfonso is right behind him blowing the whistle, Rob enters the ring and points to himself as the crowd yells his name, he does a spin-kick on his last name. The bell rings, and Fonzie and Chyna leave the ring, and Van Dam and Austin have a stare down for a couple moments.
Mark: See Van Dam is trembling with fear as Austin is glaring at him. And they are going at it like two wild animals, punches are being exchanged, Rob takes Austin down and is back on top of him punching, they are rolling around exchanging blows. I thought this might be intense but not THIS intense, Rob must really want that belt bad, OK the ref has them seperat–no they are at each others throat again. Rob gives Austin a series of stiff kicks to the chest, and gives him a drop-toe hold. Rob leaps on the middle ring rope, and goes for a moonsault, and Austin rolls out of the way, and starts to stomp away at Van Dam. The ref pulls Austin away after Rob grabs on to the rope. What a wimp, take it like a man you pussy! Rob stands up slowly, shaking his head, maybe clearing it or, trying to see if he still has any brains left. Test of strength as both men tie up, Austin gains the advantage, and throws Rob into the ropes. Clothesline, levels RVD, Austin climbs the turnbuckle and raises up his hands. Wow the fan support for this match is really hard to tell who is on who side. Both two awesome competitors in their own element. Rob sneaks up behind and grabs Austin, running tiger bomb, into a pin. 1-2 no God that was close, Rob stomps on Austin’s chest a couple times, and jumps to the turnbuckle, and dives off of it, with a corkscrew somersault senton splash, connects with Austin on the mark. Cover 1…2…no Chyna pulls RVD to the outside, and OUCH, just popped him right in the kisser! Wait what is Fonzie doing with that chair, he handed it to Chyna? That must mean…Bill Alfonso is in DX Sweet! Wait a minute, Rob just tapped her on the shou–VAN DAMINATOR! Good God, Chyna is out, Austin slides out of the ring and runs up behind Alfonso and gives him a forearm smash. Austin runs at Rob, and RVD ducks throwing Austin into the audience. The crowd must be loving that. Rob climbs back in the ring, and runs up leaping on the turnbuckle. Austin is getting up. Rob takes flight….Somersault plancha! Both men are down, and not moving, the crowd is going crazy, this is absolutely nuts. Rob is the first to get up, and picks up Austin and sends him back over the railing and limps on to the railing and gives Austin a hurricanrana. Rob slides back into the ring, and points to himself, what a cocky SOB! Austin slowly slides back into the ring, Fonzie throws Rob a chair, Rob throws it at Austin. Austin catches it, Rob goes for the Van Daminator, Austin ducks and throws the chair into Rob’s face. Rob staggers a bit before falling down. Austin picks up Rob and throws him into the turnbuckle, Rob accidentally KO’d the ref. Austin takes off his shirt, he must mean business now, whenever anyone takes off their shirt it means that they are pissed and they want to win. Austin grabs Rob and gives him a short arm clothesline. Austin picks him up again, Stone Cold S-no Rob pushes him away, Rob rolls on the mat, picking up the chair and throws it at Austin, he catches it, Rob leaps and rebounds off the turnbuckle, VAN DAMINATOR! VAN DAMINATOR! HE HIT THE VAN DAMINATOR! Cover…the crowd goes for the count by the ref is out. Will someone please shut Bill Alfonso up with that damn whistle! RVD is trying to revive the ref, Austin gets up slowly. The ref is coming too, Austin twirls RVD around, and hits the STUNNER! Cover, 1-2 NO…..HOW IN THE HELL DID ROB KICK OUT?!? Wait a minute who is that running out, wait a minute, Austin turns around and gets cracked in the head with a cane. Damn YOU it is that bastard former member of the Impact Players Justin Credible! He grabs Austin, …That’s Incredible! Rob climbs the ropes lacking a lot of energy, and leaps hitting his Five Star Frog Splash. Cover 1….2….3! Justin just made himself a wanted man, Rob and him embrace, Alfonso blows the whistle and attaches the belt to Rob’s waist. Justin Credible grabs a microphone. Austin is bleeding from the head, and not moving! Paramedics rush to the ring.
Winner and new TV Champ: Justin Credible
Credible: Now THAT WAS JUST NOT THE COOLEST, THAT WAS JUST NOT THE BEST, NOW THAT WAS JUSTIN….CREDIBLE.
Rhino: Yes my man Justin is back in a descent federation! Hell yeah, fucked that Texas boy up! Rob and Justin will make one hell of a combination! Crap and we still got one more match that will blow the roof off this fucker. We will be back after this important commercial break.
Commercial break ends, and footage of the past matches and the arrival of the Impact Player, Justin Credible helping RVD get a win over Austin for the title is shown. Michael Cole is in the back with Justin.
MC: Justin just a few moments ago we saw you arrive in the EWA and help out Rob Van Dam. Why did you do this?
Justin: If you people would ask intelligent questions then you wouldn’t be so damn curious why we do this kind of crap. Robbie called me up and asked me if I wanted to roll with him in the newly opened up Extreme Wrestling Alliance, so I jumped off of ECW, and came over here, and helped out Rob. Stone Cold, you thought you could steal the pay-per-view, and Rob’s chances, you thought you could make an Impact, but the only ones making the ratings here are RVD, the new TV champion. Now that my friends, ….is Justin Credible!
Cameras fade back to Mark and Rhino.
Mark: Welcome back fans, and in just the first half we have seen a tremendous matches and events take place. From my boys the KKK, AND Austin losing the belts, and Mankind and The Big Show, firmly stating that they are going to get a tag title shot and no one is going to stop them.
Rhino: And on that note we also saw the arrival of one of ECW’s Impact Players siding with Rob Van Dam. They are telling us that the main event is about to start. This match is going to be everything but a friendly game of tag.
Scott Steiner w/ Buff Vs. Triple H w/ Chyna and Austin
nWo’s music hits and Scott Steiner and Buff come out. Scott and Buff pose for the camera and enter the ring. Buff and Scott pose for some of the woman out in the audience, and then make fun of some over weight slob. Triple H’s music hits up, and Austin and Chyna walk out with HHH. They walk towards the ring, and the referee grabs a set of handcuffs, and Buff reluctantly slides out of the ring, and the ref handcuffs him to Austin. Sid’s music strikes up, and Sid walks out, the fans chant him name as he walks in a stalking like manner, grinning at Chyna. She glares at him as she is handcuffed to him. Scott hands the EWA World Title to the ring announcer, and Triple H gets in the ring.
Mark: There is the bell and the main event has officially started. You know I don’t like the deals of this match. It seems fishy to me. BPP and HHH hook up, BPP shoves Triple H down with his strength. Steiner grabs Triple H, and lifts him high into the air into a hanging vertical suplex. Steiner applies a camel clutch now, applying pressure to the lower back. Triple H immediately grabs on to the ropes, and Scott breaks the hold. Scott is slowing down the pace some, and lays in those large arms to The Game’s back. Look at Sid, he is just smiling, the emotions that must be going through his head, the sick and twisted thoughts, he is, well he is Psycho Sid, enough said. Scott Steiner whips HHH into the corner, and places HHH on the top rope and comes off with a reverse FrankenStiener. Cover, 1-2-No kick out by Hunter-Hearst. Scott goes off the ropes, wait Austin tripped him up, and Buff uses his weight and hurls himself at the steel stairs and whips Austin into the ropes, both men are down. Austin looks like he received the brute force of that stairway. HHH is now up and delivers a knee drop to Scott’s arm. And another one for good measure, HHH crotch chops at Scott, and yell some words at Sid….but I don’t think they were congratulations for beating the Rock. Triple H grabs Scott and pulls himself, low blow by Steiner, brings HHH down to his knees. Steiner grabs HHH, and pulls him in between his legs, Scott picks HHH up and brings him down hard with a piledriver. Cover…1-2-No damn that was another close call. Steiner is definitely showing us why he gained the World title. Scott picks up HHH and throws him into the ropes, and gives HHH a power slam. HHH is really hurting out there, Steiner grabs HHH and drives him into the mat with a spiking brain buster. Cover, 1-2, no Chyna pulled out the ref, and popped him straight in the mouth, and begins to stomp on him. Sid grabs Chyna and plants his hand on her throat, the fans are cheering in excitement. HHH baseball slides out of the ring and into Sid. HHH grabs the keys from the ref, and unlocks Chyna, and then handcuffs Sid to the ring post. Austin gives Buff the Stunner. Triple H unhandcuffs Austin, and they high-five. Triple H is pointing for Austin to go in the back. Austin walks backwards watching the fi–hold on a second, is that…Rob Van Dam and Bill Alfonzo are walking down the entrance ramp. Rob said he was going to hit Austin with the Van Daminator twice before this Pay-per-view was done. Triple H, quickly points behind Austin and Austin turns around. Fonzie throws the chair and Rob gives him the Van Daminator! He hit it twice, Rob lives up to his promise. The crowd is going crazy, Rob points to himself and spits at Austin and walks in the back. Meanwhile back to the match, how come Sid is laughing? Triple H is back in the ring and gives Steiner a low blow, he sets him up for the Pedigree. WAIT A MINUTE SID IS RUNNING DOWN THE RAMP, HOW IN THE HELL, HE SLIDES IN, AND SHOVES HHH OFF OF STEINER, SID GRABS HHH, CHOKESLAM!!!! The fake Sid is picking the lock, wait a minute it is PURGATORY! I thought something was up, this was a double cross, Steiner pins HHH, Chyna gets in the ring, but Sid levels her with a clothesline! Purgatory is grabbing a briefcase, and opening it, what in the wor–OH NO Barbwire! Wait a second he is wrapping it around himself, laughing, blood is now dripping from his forehead. To top it off he is setting up a table, what will be done now? The ref is recovers, Steiner puts HHH in the Steiner Recliner, HHH is out! The bells sounds.
Winner and still EWA World Champ: Scott Steiner
Sid helps Buff in the ring, and raises their hands, Purgatory is still setting up tables, doesn’t he know this match is over? He must have two sets of tables stacked up and set up. The fans are booing Sid, Scott and Buff look at each other with amazement, and go to shake Sid’s hand. SIDS GOT THEM IN HIS GRASPS, HE PICKS THEM UP AND WALKS OVER TO THE TOP ROPE, THE FANS ARE GOING CRAZY, AND… (Sid chokeslams them through the sets of tables from the top rope to the outside, Buff and Scott are nearly folded in half, the whole arena gasps in amazement. Rhino and Mark, rip off their headsets, and stand up looking in disbelief. Purgatory quickly gets on his knees and starts to beg, Sid, and Sid nods, a look of madness in his eyes, he looks at a disoriented Triple H. Purgatory is still wrapped in the barbwire, and he sets up a table on the outside and Sid punches HHH a few times and lays him on the table. Sid grabs Purgatory, and powerbombs him, barbwire and all, on to Triple H through the table. Triple H and Purgatory are bleeding profusely, and Purgatory is smiling sadistically. Mark puts back on the head-set, still in shock.) D….dear God, well medical officials, and security are out to help and secure the injured and hold off Sid…Rhino, do you have anything to comment on.
Rhino: I think….I just wet myself. I have never seen that kind of action before in my life. Sid, has really hit the deep-end. I mean….total carnage, he is mad….simply crazy, off his rocker. I wouldn’t have believed this if I heard about it….fans, that is it for Clash of the Champions. We will be back for Tuesday Night Carnage, see you then.
The cameras fade to black after scenes of the past few moments are replayed.