Tuesday Night Carnage 02-14-06
Mark:Welcome everyone to Tuesday Night Carnage live from the Pepsi Center here in Denver… I am your Play by Play Man Mark along side my tag team partner… Rhino…
Rhino:Mark, tonight is looking to be a great night…
Mark:Our main event tonight is going to be a Lumberjack Match for the EWA World Heavyweight Championship…
Rhino:Can Triple H recapture the gold tonight? Or can Doug Kinsella take out The Game and prove that he belongs…
Mark:It is going to be an interesting Main Event…Also tonight Subway and Megumi Kudo continue the Best of Five Series between the two of them…
Rhino:What has Megumi Kudo come up with for this match up?
Mark:There is plenty to get to…So lets not waste anytime… And lets get to our opening contest…
Lone Jobber vs PFC Holliday
Pa Announcer:Tonights Opening Contest is set for one fall… Introducing first…From Troy, Al.. Weighing in at 258 Pounds… PFC HOLLIDAY…
(PFC Holliday’s theme plays as he enters the arena…)
Pa Announcer:His opponent… From The Slaughter House… Weighing in at 235 Pounds… LONE JOBBER…
(“I want it all” plays as Lone Jobber enters the arena…)
Mark:The referee calls for the bell and this match up is underway… Lone Jobber locks up with a collar and elbow tie up in the center of the ring…Lone Jobber backs PFC Holliday in to the corner… PFC Holliday shoves Lone Jobber away…
Rhino:Lone Jobber didnt like to be shoved away like that…
Mark:Lone Jobber and PFC Holliday are now face to face jaw jacking at one another… Lone Jobber slaps PFC Holliday right across the face…
Rhino:That isnt sitting well with PFC Holliday…
Mark:PFC Holliday slaps him right back…
Rhino:Lone Jobber is smiling after that…
Mark:PFC Holliday whips Lone Jobber in to the ropes… PFC Holliday nails him with a back body drop… Lone Jobber gets right back up to his feet… PFC Holliday goes for a clothesline… Lone Jobber ducks and PFC Holliday goes over the top rope and to the floor he goes…
Rhino:That backfired on PFC Holliday…
Mark:Lone Jobber slingshots himself over the top rope and lands right on top of PFC Holliday… Lone Jobber follows it up with straight right hands as he is on top of PFC Holliday…
Rhino:Lone Jobber rolls PFC Holliday back in to the ring…
Mark:Lone Jobber now opens up with right hands… Lone Jobber kicks him in the midsection… DDT by Lone Jobber… Lone Jobber goes for the cover 1……………………….2……………. PFC Holliday gets his shoulder up…
Rhino:PFC Holliday is in some trouble right now…
Mark:Lone Jobber hooks up PFC Holliday and nails him with a front face suplex… Here is another cover 1……………….2……………. PFC Holliday gets his shoulder up again…
Rhino:Lone Jobber is dominating this match up this far…
Mark:Lone Jobber now hooks up PFC Holliday and puts him up on the top rope…
Rhino:PFC Holliday is not in a good position right now…
Mark:Lone Jobber hooks up PFC Holliday for a superplex… Blocked by PFC Holliday and he gets knocked off the top rope…
Rhino:Lone Jobber is getting back up on his feet…
Mark:Double Axe Handle by PFC Holliday connecting on Lone Jobber…
Rhino:PFC Holliday is starting to fight back…
Mark:PFC Holliday hooks up Lone Jobber and nails him with a chokeslam…
Rhino:Lone Jobber was just driven in to the canvas…
Mark:PFC Holliday covers Lone Jobber 1…………………2…………………….. Lone Jobber gets his shoulder up…
Rhino:PFC Holliday is now waiting for Lone Jobber to get back up to his feet…
Mark:Lone Jobber turns around… HOLLIDAY BOMB!
Rhino:PFC just drilled Lone Jobber right in to the canvas…
Mark:PFC is signaling for the Holliday Destroyer…
Rhino:Lone Jobber is staggering up on to his feet…
Mark:PFC Holliday has him setup… Lone Jobber counters out of the Holliday Destroyer… Lone Jobber hammers back with right hands…
Rhino:Lone Jobber saw the ending coming and is starting to fight back…
Mark:PFC Holliday ducks the clothesline… PFC Holliday hooks him up again… HOLLIDAY DESTROYER! NO! Lone Jobber counters out again… Lone Jobber hooks him up… THE GIMMICK!
Rhino:That is it…
Mark:Lone Jobber hooks the leg 1………………………..2………………….3…… This one is over…
Pa Announcer:Here is your winner LONE JOBBER…
Rhino:Lone Jobber picks up the win and is heading to the Extreme Bowl looking to win his second Extreme Bowl Title…
Mark:Can Lone Jobber do it? We will see at the Extreme Bowl…Lets get set for our next contest…
Barbed Wire Madness
William McConnell Vs Shane Munns
Written by Psyko Boy PYB
(“Kryptonite” hits over the PA System as Shane Munns approaches the ring..)
PA Announcer: The following contest is BARBED WIRE MADNESS.. Making his way to the ring, from Morrisville, NC.. Weighing in at 253 pounds.. SHANE MUNNS..
(“The Answer” hits over the PA System as McConnell makes his way from the back..)
PA Announcer: And his opponent.. From Sin City, Weighing in at 226 pounds.. He is THE ANSWER.. WILLIAM.. MCCONNELL..
Mark: McConnell wearing a barbed wire crown as he carries a large ankh like barbed wire cross and leaves it at ringside..
Rhino: Munns in the ring and looking ready. The ropes are wrapped in barbed wire instead of replaced.
Mark: McConnell on the apron.. Munns charges, but McConnell with a shoulder through the ropes.. Shane Munns hooked, McConnell has him up in a stalling suplex.. And Munns gets dropped across the apron!
Rhino: That won’t do any good for him.
Mark: To the outside now, McConnell with hard rights to Shane Munns.. Irish towards the steps, Munns reverses.. McConnell leaps onto the stairs and backflips onto Munns!
Rhino: Great athleticism right there.
Mark: McConnell rolls Munns into the ring and the bell is rung.. McConnell putting the boots to Munns.. Munns pulled to his feet and whipped into the ropes and goess back first into the barbed wire ropes!
Rhino: And before Munns even has a chance to recover from the barbed wire he’s rebounded right into McConnell who clotheslines him.
Mark: Shane Munns right back to his feet but gets caught in the face with a back elbow from McConnell.. Munns stumbles back into the corner.. McConnell charges and Munns counters with a drop toehold!
Rhino: McConnell went face first into the turnbuckle.
Mark: Munns with a couple of forearms across McConnell backs.. A waistlock now applied, but McConnell nails Munns with an elbow and gets behind him.. McConnell goes for a german suplex, but Munns blocks and goes for a victory roll.. McConnell holds on! Munns in trouble.. GOOD GOD.. A modified German suplex and did you hear that impact?!
Rhino: McConnell held onto that waistlock and launched Munns over his shoulder..
Mark: Munns slow to his feet, only get clotheslined back down.. McConnell brings Munns to his feet and delivers a series of rights..
Rhino: McConnell is showing no sign of letting up..
Mark: A kick to the gut and McConnell gets Munns up for a suplex.. Munns slips out! McConnell pushed into the ropes and rebounds, Munns with a roll up! 1………………………….2………… McConnell kicks out.
Rhino: McConnell went chest first into the barbed wire wrapped ropes, giving Munns a chance for a pinfall..
Mark: McConnell back to his, Munns nails his own rights.. Shane Munns whips McConnell towards the ropes, holds on, brings McConnell in and nails an STO!
Rhino: Nicely done, there..
Mark: McConnell getting to his feet slowly.. Munns waiting for him.. McConnell turns around.. Munns hoists him up! He’s going for the Pass to Death!
Rhino: McConnell in trouble!
Mark: McConnell quickly slides out, Munns gets shoved right into the turnbuckle.. AND SPLASHED..
Rhino: McConnell follows up quickly with a corner splash..
Mark: The Answer grabbing Munns by the head now.. He’s placing Munns forehead on the ropes.. And he’s dragging him all the way to the next turnbuckle!
Rhino: Munns head is getting ripped across that barbed wire!
Mark: McConnell stops at the turnbuckle and slams Munns head into it, and Munns is bleeding bad..
Rhino: That was McConnell’s intent the whole time..
Mark: McConnell smells blood.. He rolls to the outside and starts looking under the ring apron.. He’s tossed a chair and a 2×4 into the ring, both covered in barbed wire, as well as a roll of it..
Rhino: All the while Munns is trying to collect himself..
Mark: Munns getting to one knee.. But McConnell nails him with a shining wizard! Munns down to the mat and McConnell mounts him.. and begins laying in vicious rights..
Rhino: Munns really needs to get something going here..
Mark: McConnell picking up that barbed wire chair and places Munns head on it.. McConnell backs into a corner.. McConnell with a running knee drop! Munns moves and McConnells knee lands on that chair!
Rhino: This’ll hopefully give Munns some time to get back to his feet..
Mark: Munns has his hands on the 2×4.. McConnell to his feet and moves towards him.. Munns with a shot to the gut! McConnell stumbles back, Munns to his feet and levels McConnell with the 2×4!
Rhino: That shot was right to the face of McConnell..
Mark: McConnell stumbling, holding his face.. Munn charges from behind and nails a bulldog, driving McConnells face into the mat..
Rhino: Munns getting an offense built here..
Mark: McConnell getting to his feet, but Munns is right on him with several punches.. McConnell whipped into the ropes and Munns takes him down with a hard clothesline..
Rhino: McConnell in trouble..
Mark: Munns putting the boots to McConnell.. Munns gets McConnell to his feet, kick to the gut, hooks him and nails a suplex right onto the barbed wire chair!
Rhino: Thats gonna do him no favors..
Mark: Munns slides under the ropes to the outside and grabs a barbed wire plank.. McConnell to his feet, Munns carrying the plank towards the ring.. MCCONNELL WITH A NO HANDS ROPE FLIP..
Rhino: McConnell landed right on that barbed wire plank and took Munns down!
Mark: That hurt both men, but I don’t think McConnell cares.. McConnell slowly getting back to his feet, Munns beginning to stir.. McConnell tosses the board off Munns and picks him up..
Rhino: McConnell’s yelling into the face of Munns.. Yelling “Where’s your god now”..
Mark: McConnell now delivering vicious headbutts to Munns, getting Munns blood all over his face.. McConnell now whips Munns into the barrier.. And is picking up that barbed wire plank..
Rhino: What the hell is McConnell planning?
Mark: McConnell charges.. and smashes Munns right in between the barrier and that plank!
Rhino: Good god, Munns just slumped over..
Mark: McConnell grabbing Munns and walking him around the ring and.. Oh good god..
Rhino: McConnell is now holding Munns face right up to his family and telling his wife to give Munns a kiss..
Mark: The Munns family backing away.. And McConnell is slamming Munns head across the barrier.. McConnell whips Munns towards the turnpost, but Munns reverses! McConnell goes face first!
Rhino: And now McConnell is busted open as well!
Mark: Munns getting to his feet slowly, pushing the plank into the ring.. Munns rolls in, McConnell falling him as blood trickles from his forehead..
Rhino: Both men bleeding, both feeling the effects of barbed wire..
Mark: McConnell staggering to his feet, Munns still on his knees.. McConnell attempts to pick Munns to his feet.. FIREMAN’S CARRY.. Munns hoists McConnell up! …PASS TO DEATH! RIGHT ON THE BARBED WIRE PLANK!
Rhino: THAT COULD BE IT!
Mark: McConnell writhing in pain as he rolls off the plank, Munns collapses to the ground.. He needs to capitalise!
Rhino: The fans here are cheering Munns on, trying to get him going!
Mark: Neither man can be counted out here.. Munns starting to stir, McConnell reaching for that roll of barbed wire..
Rhino: I think we know what he’s planning to do..
Mark: McConnell beginning to wrap that roll around his right for, preparing the barbed wire superkick.. Munns to his feet, McConnell up.. McConnell turns around and GETS LEVELED WITH A SPEAR!
Rhino: Thats just what Munns needed!
Mark: Munns stays on McConnell and begins hammering him with rights.. McConnell brought to his feet.. Munns with an Irish Whip, McConnell twists through and goes for a back body drop, Munns slides over.. McConnell turns around, Clothesline by Munns.. Ducked.. FIVE STAR SU-.. NO, DUCKED.. McConnell turns around, kicked in the gut, PILEDRIVER..
Rhino: Munns came close to losing it right there, but was able to duck the kick..
Mark: Munns getting McConnell to his feet and shoves him into the ropes.. And Munns has wrapped McConnells arms between them!
Rhino: McConnells in trouble!
Mark: McConnell is stuck in the ropes.. And Munns has that barbed wire chair! Munns swings, but McConnell kicks the chair away!
Rhino: He’s still fighting back..
Mark: McConnell just got both legs around Munns head! Munns grabs the legs and pulls! SITOUT POWERBOMB..
Rhino: McConnell’s arms just got ripped to all hell by that barbed wire when Munns pulled him out!
Mark: Munns with a cover! 1………………………………2………………………..3-NO! McConnell gets the shoulder up!
Rhino: But barely!
Mark: Munns grabbing that barbed wire chair once more.. McConnell getting to his knees.. LOW BLOW.. McConnell resorting to a cheap shot to protect himself..
Rhino: And its completely legal.
Mark: McConnell to his feet, hooks Munns.. PSYDE EFFECT..
Rhino: Munns is down and McConnell is in control..
Mark: McConnell to the corner.. And he’s readying to end this, he’s calling for a superkick.. Munns slowly getting to his feet.. Turns around.. FIVE STAR SUPERKICK.. That barbed wire foot caught him right in the jaw and Munns is DOWN..
Rhino: McConnell has a sick smile on his face.. And he’s pulling in that barbed wire ankh..
Mark: He’s laid flat in the center of the ring.. And he’s now.. strapping Shane Munns to it!
Rhino: What the hell, is he going to crucify him?
Mark: Munns is now tied down to that ankh.. And McConnell is placing the barbed wire plank upside on him.. McConnell to the rope.. 10 POINT FROGSPLASH.. GOOD GOD, MUNNS IS SMASHED..
Rhino: McConnell tosses the plank off and steps on Munns chest.. Munns can’t even kick out..
Mark: 1………………………………2………………………………..3.. Its over!
PA Announcer: The winner of the match.. WILLIAM.. MCCONNELL..
Mark: Munns gave it his all, but McConnell was able to take it in the end..
Rhino: McConnell has untied Munns and is taking him to the outside..
Mark: How repulsive.. He just dumped a bloody Munns right into the laps of his family… Lets get back to the ring for more action…
EWA Tag Team Championship Tournament Round 1 Tornado Tag Match
Products of Society vs Freebirds
Pa Announcer:This next contest is a First Round EWA Tag Team Championship Match and is under Tornado Tag Rules… Introducing first… Team Number One… Jay Sabre and James Davis… The PRODUCTS OF SOCIETY…
(“Papercut” plays as Sabre and Davis enter the arena…)
Pa Announcer:Their Opponents… Trevor Rhodes… Buck Diamondback… THE FREEBIRDS…
(“Badstreet USA” plays as Trevor Rhodes enters the arena…)
Rhino:Where is Buck Diamondback?
Mark:I have no idea where he is… But the Products of Society are taking advantage right now…
Rhino:They are double teaming Trevor Rhodes…
Mark:Sabre and Davis whip Trevor Rhodes in to the ropes… Both Davis and Sabre duck their heads… Rhodes puts on the breaks and nails them both with uppercuts…
Rhino:Those were some stiff uppercuts…
Mark:Discus Clothesline by Trevor Rhodes laying out Jay Sabre… Davis comes back and nails Trevor Rhodes from behind with a clothesline…
Rhino:Davis is now trying to take the momentum away from Trevor Rhodes…
Mark:James Davis whips Trevor Rhodes in to the corner… Davis comes charging in… Rhodes gets the boot up… Trevor Rhodes gets up on the middle rope…Bulldog by Trevor Rhodes… Rhodes with a cover 1…………………….2…………….Sabre breaks it up…
Rhino:Sabre and Davis begin stomping away at Trevor Rhodes…
Mark:Jay Sabre scoops him up and slams him down to the canvas… Davis comes off the top rope and drops a huge leg drop…
Rhino:That could be it…
Mark:James Davis goes for a cover 1………………………..2……………………….3…… NO! Trevor got his shoulder up…
Rhino:Trevor Rhodes is making his way back up on to his feet…
Mark:Running Clothesline by Jay Sabre crushing Trevor Rhodes in to the corner…James Davis hooks him up…X2 Piledriver Connects by James Davis…
Rhino:That could be it…
Mark:They arent done yet though… James Davis now puts Trevor Rhodes up on his shoulders…
Rhino:Sabre is up on the top rope…
Mark:Bulldog from the Top Rope connects on Trevor Rhodes…
Rhino:That was nice Double Team Move…
Mark:Sabre goes for the cover 1……………………..2………………………3……… ITS OVER!
Pa Announcer:Here are your winners the PRODUCTS OF SOCIETY…
Rhino:The numbers game caught up with Trevor Rhodes and the Products of Society move on to fight for the Tag Team Titles…
Mark:Can The Products of Society pull off the upset next week at Extreme Bowl and become the EWA Tag Team Champions… We will have to wait and see… But its now time for the FTW Championship Match…
FTW Championship TLC Match
Heidenreich(c) vs Payne Killer vs Taz
Pa Announcer:This next contest is set for one fall and is a TLC Weapons Match… And is for the FTW Championship… Introducing First… The Challengers… From Selma, Ca…Weighing in at 265 Pounds… PAYNE KILLER…
(“Thou Shall” plays as Payne Killer enters the arena…)
Pa Announcer:His opponent… From The Red Hook District of Brooklyn, New York… Weighing in at 240 Pounds… TAZ…
(“Survive” plays as Taz enters the arena…)
Pa Announcer:And their oppponent… From New Orleans… Weighing in at 275 Pounds… The FTW Champion… HEIDENREICH…
(“Dangerous Politics” plays as Taz enters the arena…)
Mark:Taz is not wasting anytime as he goes right after Heidenreich with shots right to the face… Taz attempts to hook up Heidenreich and he nails Taz right in the back with hard shots…
Rhino:Heidenreich is just hammering Taz at the moment…
Mark:Heidenreich with a gut wrench suplex driving Taz right down to the canvas…
Rhino:Payne Killer just brought a table in to the ring…
Mark:Heidenreich throws Taz over the top rope and Taz hits the floor hard…
Rhino:Payne Killer is now up in the face of the FTW Champion…
Mark:Payne Killer ducks the right hand of Heidenreich and nails Heidenreich with a belly to back suplex… Payne Killer drops the leg right on top of Heidenreich…
Rhino:Payne Killer just went to the outside of the ring and brings in a steel chain…
Mark:Payne Killer whips Heidenreich with the steel chain right across the back…
Rhino:Did you see the red mark that left…
Mark:Heidenreich’s back is beat red after a few more shots with the steel chain…
Rhino:Heidenreich is in some pain…
Mark:Taz comes back in to the ring and spins Payne Killer around and smashes a light bulb right over the head of Payne Killer…
Rhino:Payne Killer is now bleeding…
Mark:Taz grabs a piece of the broken light bulb and drives it right in to the forehead of Payne Killer…
Rhino:He is trying to really open up the cut of Payne Killer…
Mark:Payne Killer’s face is starting to turn in to a crimson mask…
Rhino:Taz is now on top of Payne Killer…
Mark:Taz is now hammering Payne Killer with hard forearm shots…Heidenreich is back up and pulls Taz off of Payne Killer…
Rhino:Heidenreich wants to do some damage to Taz…
Mark:Taz with a shot to the midsection of Heidenreich… As he hooks up Heidenreich… T-BONE TAZPLEX THROUGH THE TABLE!
Rhino:Heidenreich could be done and Taz could become the New FTW Champion…
Mark:Taz goes for the cover 1………………………….2…………………… Payne Killer pulls Taz off…
Rhino:Payne Killer is wiping the blood out of his eyes…
Mark:Belly to Belly Suplex by Payne Killer…
Rhino:Payne Killer is bringing another table in to the ring…
Mark:Payne Killer puts Taz up on the top rope…
Rhino:Taz is in some trouble…
Mark:PAYNE RELIEVER THROUGH THE TABLE!
Rhino:OH… MY… GOD!
Mark:Taz looks to be out cold…
Rhino:He was driven from the top rope through the table…
Mark:Payne Killer hooks the leg…
Rhino:We are looking at the new FTW Champion…
Mark:Cover 1…………………..2…………………………….3……… NO! Heidenreich comes in and pulls Payne Killer off of Heidenreich…
Rhino:Heidenreich and Payne Killer are nose to nose in the ring…
Mark:Heidenreich scores with right hands… Payne Killer fights back with a couple of right hands over his own…
Rhino:They are slugging it out…
Mark:Heidenreich whips Payne Killer in to the ropes… Side Walk Slam connects by John Heidenreich…
Rhino:Heidenreich is now bringing a couple of singapore canes in to the ring…
Mark:Heidenreich cracks the singapore cane right across the back of Payne Killer… One more shot this time right to the head of Payne Killer…
Rhino:Payne Killer has already lost a lot of blood and that shot didnt help the cut on his forehead…
Mark:Heidenreich goes back to the outside of the ring and is bringing in a trash can…
Rhino:Payne Killer is staggering back up to his feet…
Mark:Payne Killer turns around… Heidenreich swings… Payne Killer with a drop toe hold and Heidenreich goes face first in to the trash can…
Rhino:There is fight left in Payne Killer…
Mark:Payne Killer grabs the singapore cane and nails Heidenreich right in the head as his head was already on the trash can…
Rhino:I think someones head is going to be ringing after that shot…
Mark:Payne Killer is now waiting for Heidenreich to get back up on to his feet…
Rhino:Payne Killer is lining him up…
Mark:Taz is back up… TAZMISSION!
Rhino:Taz has it locked in on Payne Killer…
Mark:Heidenreich quickly breaks it up before Taz could get him wrapped up…
Rhino:Heidenreich saved the FTW Title by breaking that up…
Mark:Heidenreich goes for a clothesline… Taz ducks… T-Bone Tazplex…
Rhino:Payne Killer is back up…
Mark:Taz with a go behind… German Release Tazplex sending Payne Killer over the top rope and to the floor he goes…
Rhino:Taz grabs the trash can…
Mark:Repeated Shots by Taz with the trash can right to the head of Heidenreich…
Rhino:Heidenreich looks to be out on his feet…
Mark:Taz goes for another T-Bone…Heidenreich blocks…
Rhino:Heidenreich is firing back at Taz…
Mark:Taz gets sent in to the ropes… Big Boot by Heidenreich…
Rhino:Taz is now staggering around…
Mark:POWER DUNK! NO! Taz gets out of it… Go behind… TAZMISSION!
Rhino:Taz has it locked in…
Mark:Taz gets his legs wrapped around Heidenreich…
Rhino:There is no where for him to go…
Mark:Heidenreich Taps Out! NEW CHAMPION!
Pa Announcer:Here is your winner and NEW FTW Champion TAZ…
Rhino:Taz came in and did what he said he was going to do and that was become the New FTW Champion…
Mark:Can anyone stop the original FTW Champion? Its time for another match in the Best of Five Series between Subway and Megumi Kudo…
Best of Five Series
Match 4-Slaughter House
Megumi Kudo vs Subway
Written by rocknsock & psyko boy pyb
Mark:We are now going live to Death Valley, California… The site of the Latest Slaughter House Match up here in the EWA… Between Megumi Kudo and Subway… Now Rhino, these two have been battling for the past month or so… We have seen them in a variety of matches… The latest being the Japanesse Death Match, which left Megumi and Subway as PYB would say, Bloodied, Battered and Brusied…
Rhino: This is a bitter rivalry that can only be settled in the extremist of situations, Mark.. However, alot of people within the EWA aren’t too happy with Kudo’s last minute choice for this match.. Whatever the case though, its happening and its happening now.
Mark:The history is there… People are waiting and it looks like our feed is ready to go… As we see Subway standing in the front yard looking around for Megumi Kudo… The Front Door Just Opened up and Megumi Kudo is standing there behind Subway… Subway turns around… HurricanKudo from the steps on to the Subway… That was about six steps high from where she was standing Rhino…
Rhino:Already, Kudo’s using her enviroment to her advantage, sneaking up on Subway, then attacking.. Subway quick to his feet however and charges Kudo..
Mark:Subway hit his head on the concrete and is trying to shake it off… Megumi Kudo grabs him by his hair and rams him right in to the iron railing… Low Kick by Megumi Kudo as she takes Subway off his feet… Kudo is now heading over to the fence looking like she has something in mind…
Rhino: Kudo examining the fence, and it looks like its wrapped in barbed wire.. No doubt a Slaughterhouse renovation.. She’s got Subway by his head and runs him face first right into the fencing!
Mark:The Barbed Wire is digging right in to his forehead…Its not the first time he has felt the barbed wire… Hell it might not be the 1000th time he has felt barbed wire in his forehead and already he is seeing blood and they havent even gotten in to the house just yet… Right now Megumi slams Subway on to the concrete… Megumi climbs up on the side of the fence… Megumi leaps off of the fence!
Rhino: And Kudo just about eats Subways entire foot as he gets it up! Kudo stumbles back against the fence as Subway gets to his feet.. Kudo goes for a right, Subway ducks and grabs her hair and begins slamming her against the fence post as hard as he can!
Mark:Not much hair there to grab… But he is grabbing what he can… Subway in prime position now as he hooks up the women he hates as much as Rhino hates going on a diet… Front Face Suplex on to the barbed fire fence right on the door part of the fence… Subway opens up the door and Megumi gets her head smashed in between the door and the fence…
Rhino: I think Kudo’s bleeding from the mouth.. She probably bite right into her tongue when she was eating Subways boot.. Subway is now mounting Kudo and delivering some vicious punches and you can hear the bone colliding with his fists.. And he’s loving it..
Mark:Subway is now escorting Megumi up the stairs as they get to the front door… Being the Gentlemen that he is… Subway opens the door for Megumi and quickly shuts it making her head ring even more… Both are now inside…Subway is scooping out the living room area… Not much is there except for some beat up furniture… Subway slams Megumi down on to the sofa and gets on top of her… Subway is doing some girations as he lays on top of her… Moms and dads… Cover your childrens eyes… As this part may get graphic…
Rhino: That is not pleasant.. But Kudo starts fighting back with several headbutts straight to Subways nose, then manages to knock him off onto the floor.. Kudo mounts Subway and does a few gyrations of her own…
Mark:I hope we dont see one of them give birth to a hand… That would just be gross…Subway shoves her off of him… Disgarding his bitch as he puts it… Subway with a headbutt of his own to Megumi before throwing her in to the wall… Subway now lines her up just right… Subway charges… Megumi Kudo is able to side step him and Subway goes head first in to the wall… That to me Rhino is not a good place to be…
Rhino: Subway trying to get his head out of that wall.. Kudo spreads his legs and.. FIELD GOAL.. And Subway is jumping around in pain! Kudo looking around the living room now, and I believe she has spotted the fireplace.. And knowing the slaughterhouse, chances ar… Yeup, there’s a branding iron!
Mark:Megumi bends Subway over a chair… Branding Iron right to the buttcheeks of the EWA Co-Vp… Subway now trying to find somewhere to cool his ass off… And he heads in to the kitchen… And sticks his ass right in the sink as he turns the cold water on… Megumi not known for being a cook grabs a frying pan and cracks it over the head of Subway…
Rhino: Subway not fairing well thus far in this battle.. He’s looking dazed from that frying pan while Kudo seems to be setting the table.. Of course, this house wife has other plans for that chinaware.. Subway pulling his ass out of the sink, Kudo swings with the frying pan again, ducked.. Subway grabs her by the head and begins slamming her head against the sink! Subways got something in his hand now.. It looks like a steel wool brillo pad..
Mark:Subway is trying to stick the brillo pad down her throat… The Soapy Bubbles now coming out of her mouth… Subway is cleaning out her filthy mouth…Subway now breaks a broom right over her back… I dont think she will be doing any cleaning with that broom… As they move out of the kitchen and are heading back towards the living room… Subway is looking at the lamp a funny way Rhino…
Rhino: Knowing Subway, anything could happen with that lamp.. Kudo now thrown across the coffee table, Subway grabs that lamp.. Kudo to her feet.. (SHATTER) DAMN.. Right over her head! That wasn’t a flimsy lamp either! Kudo is down and she is bleeding! I think she may even have a shard caught under her eye.. Ew..
Mark:Megumi Kudo is really taking a beating at the moment… Both however have lost amount of blood which could cause them some problems… Subway is now heading up the stairs with Megumi Kudo…Kudo though headbutts Subway and follows it up by ramming his head in to the railing…Megumi breaks a piece of the wooden railing and smashes Subway over the head…
Rhino: Subway looking a bit tipsy.. Woooooaaaah.. He looks like he could fall any moment.. Kudo hammering him right in the face, like shes trying to break OFF his nose.. Subway slips off! He could be going… No? Kudo grabbed Subway by the hair and mouthed something about there being better things upstairs..
Mark:Subway grabs Megumi Kudo by her headlights… At one point in time I think Subway would have enjoyed it… Subway now hooks up Megumi Kudo… SUPLEX OFF THE STAIRS!
Rhino: OH MY GOD.. KUDO LANDED IN A HEAP AS SHE WENT THROUGH THE COFFEE TABLE.. Subway just stumbles to a sitting position on the stairs, a smile stretching ear to ear as he knows he could’ve just broken Kudo’s back!
Mark:Subway puts her up on his shoulder and now carries her up the stairs… And I think he is deciding that Megumi needs to take a bath as they head in to the bathroom…
Rhino: Famously, bathrooms are a slaughterhouse favorite.. Anything could go down here.. Subway flips open the toilet and dumps Kudo’s head right head.. …No, I don’t wanna see that! Positiont he camera! ..Thats better. Subway is now taking a piss all over Kudo’s head!
Mark:Thats just gross… I think I am going to be sick…
Rhino: I’m never drinking lemonade again..
Mark:Subway tries to zip up… But Megumi Kudo with the Testicular Claw… I cant even call this… It makes me hurt just looking at that…
Rhino: Kudo forces Subway back into the shower as he tears down the shower curtain.. She’s beginning to fill the tub as she grabs a mirror and smashes it over Subways head..
Mark:Megumi Kudo opens up the liquid soap and is dumping it down the throat of Subway… We have moved away from the days of bar soap… To liquid soap… Megumi dumps it in the eyes as well and now turns the shower on and the water goes right in to the eyes… All I have to say is…HIS EYES ARE BURNING… HIS EYES ARE BURING and so are mine…
Rhino: Subway blinded as he stumbles out of the bathroom, trying to get away from Kudo.. He opens the first door he can find..
Mark:Its… Its… THE BOOGEYMAN! The Boogeyman is in the Closet…
Boogeyman: One two Boogey Mans Subways Second…DUCK SUBBY! Lets me have the wickedist witch of the wild west!
Rhino: Some wise words from Boogeyman that subway follows as Kudo came chargring with a clothesline.. And Kudo is right in the waiting arms of the boogeyman!
Mark:Boogeyman grabs worms out of his pocket… Boogeyman eats the worms and now opens up Megumi’s mouth and drops the worms right inside… Megumi is having a bad night Rhino… Toilet… Piss… Soap and now worms…
Rhino: Kudo is spitting out the worms as she slams the door on the boogeyman’s face.. Kudo turns around.. FLOWER VASE.. Right over the head of Megumi Kudo!
Mark:Megumi’s head is spinning now as Subway takes her in to a bedroom… All we see in that room is a beat up old mattress…Megumi rakes the eyes of Subway and now throws Subway in to the door and Subway again has his head stuck in something…Megumi walks out of the room and brings a mop that looks to be dripping wet… Megumi is now mopping Subway’s face as he is stuck in the door…
Rhino: Subway cursing out Kudo with words I’ve not even heard of.. Kudo mocking Subway, though, cracking that mop handle right of his head! Kudo back into the bed room and begins looking around.. ….What the fuck? Is that..a vibrator?
Mark:Megumi pulls down Subway’s pants… I dont even want to say what she is going to do now… Vibrator right between the buttcheeks of Subway… I believe Subway is being raped by Megumi… I cant believe those words came out of my mouth…
Rhino: This reminds me of the time Shane got the silver spoon kicked right up into his ass in the first Slaughterhouse.. Well, this is Valentines Day.. And.. well.. How in the hell do you call something like this, Mark?
Mark:I dont know… But I want a raise… Subway pulls the vibrator out of his ass and his head out of the door… Megumi slides the closet door open and pulls out an ironing board…Dropkick by Subway… Subway knocked it back in to her face and i think that was the first wrestling move of the night…
Rhino: Well, there was the suplex, but true.. Subway beginning to set up that ironing board then looks back into the closet.. Well of course! You can’t have an ironing board without an iron.. Kudo to her feet.. CLANG.. Iron right across the skull of Megumi Kudo! May as well of knocked her out..
Mark:Subway now slowly walking around after hitting Megumi with the iron… His asshole seems to be bothering him… Megumi starting to move around a little bit… Subway scoops her up… Megumi slides off of his shoulders…Megumi down on her knees… A position she might know very well… ASS BITING… MEGUMI JUST BIT HIS ALREADY SORE ASS!
Rhino: Subway is howling in pain! Then again, I would too if my ex just anally raped me.. Subway able to get away from Kudo’s jaws of life and is holding his ass tight.. Kudo charges, Subway catches her, gets her.. He’s yelling “Fuck you bitch” as he hoists her up.. SPINEBUSTER.. RIGHT THROUGH THE IRONING BOARD..
Mark:At this moment Subway must be thinking to himself… I want to be back in that cold sink… As my ass really really hurts… Subway now opens up the chest at the end of the bed and is looking around for something… Subway has a big smile on his face as he has found something he likes…
Rhino: Subway pulls the item out.. …ITS A SPIKED PADDLE.. And Subway looks happy as can be.. Kudo starting to stir.. Subway grabs her and bends her over his knee.. “My turn bitch” is the last thing we here before Subway starts slamming that battle against her ass!
Mark:If Purgatory is listening, I would send both Megumi and Subway some Rubber Doughnuts… They are going to need them after this is over with… I wonder if they will even make it to match number five… Subway still holding on to his asshole… Subway looks like he needs some fresh air and rams Megumi’s head in to the glass window and the glass shatters everywhere… Subway tries to regroup for a moment as he sits down on the bed… Subway screams in pain as he sits on a metal spring sticking out of the matress…
Rhino: Subway curses and flips the matress.. Oh boy! Look at that metal hazard! ..OH MY GOD.. Kudo just stabbed Subway in the left shoulder with a glass shard! GOOD GOD.. He is in pain!
Mark:Subway pulls the glass out of his arm… Megumi is backing up as Subway has an evil look on his face… Subway charges… Megumi ducks… OH MY GOD! SUBWAY FLIES OUT THE WINDOW! Subway landed in the empty pool and is not moving… The EWA Medical Team on seen is checking on Subway… They are calling for the stretcher… Looks to me Rhino… Megumi Kudo has won this battle..
Rhino: This was a brutal war and nothing less.. Kudo was able to pull the victory, however and we are going to round number 5..
Mark:I am being told right now that an ewa camera crew is in the ambulence with Subway and as he is awake and has something to say…
Subway:(breathing deeply) Kudo…match Five…..TILL DEATH DO US PART…NO LIMIT RULE WARFARE!(passes out)
Mark:Subway seems to have passed out again… As we are back live here in the arena…The familar tune begins to play… As it looks like Shane McMahon is on the way down to the ring to make his announcement…
(“No Chance” plays as Shane McMahon walks out in to the arena…)
Rhino:Guess Shane McMahon is going to make his major announcement…
Mark:Guess so…
Shane:The rumors have been going around about the Major Announcement I am going to make here tonight… I am also going to give everyone an update on the condition of Shawn Michaels as well… But first my announcement…
Rhino:What is it going to be?
Shane:My announcement is in regards to the Participants for the Six Annual Extreme Bowl which will be our next event… And there will be Six Men in this match up… So far you all know that it will be Lone Jobber… Joining Lone Jobber will be the following men… Payne Killer…
Rhino:Thats a good choice…
Shane:Chaos…
Mark:He could be the wild card…
Shane:Shane Munns…
Rhino:Interesting Pick…
Shane:The Next Participant is going to be a former World Champion… This person is…
(‘The Answer’ plays as William McConnell comes out to boos from the crowd on hand…)
McConnell: (clapping) Thank you, thank you.. Shane, I humbly accept your nomination for The Answer to be in the 2006 EXTREME BOWL.. (crowd boos)
Shane:When did I ever say that YOU were going to be in this match up? What makes you think you should be in the Extreme Bowl?
McConnell: Well, Shane.. What I KNOW qualifies me for the Extreme Bowl.. I’m a SIX TIME World champion.. I’ve been carrying this company for quite some time.. And quite frankly, Shane.. After what I did to Shane Munns earlier tonight, I doubt you can risk losing anymore EWA Superstars..
Shane:Well, William… Those are good points… And you know what… You will be in the Extreme Bowl… But you will not be alone… As my Major Announcement is this… At Extreme Bowl 2006… In the Extreme Bowl Match… We will see the Return of… THE ICON… THE SHOWSTOPPER… THE MAIN EVENT… HBK… SHAWN MICHAELS!
Rhino:NO WAY!
Mark:I can not believe it…
Rhino:Neither can I…
McConnell: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT.. So Shawn Michaels wants to drag his ass back to the ring, THATS FINE WITH ME.. If he thinks he’s well enough, by all means let him.. Because its at the Extreme Bowl that I will finish Shawn Michaels off ONCE.. AND FOR ALL.. AND I WILL GO ON AND TAKE WHAT IS MINE.. (crowd boos)
Shane:Well, William he will be ready and he sent along this message especially for you… Roll it…
Hardcore Theater
Shawn Michaels appears on Screen
HBK:William, I may not look in the best of shape right now… But im telling you this… At The Extreme Bowl… I will get my revenge… I will HUNT YOU DOWN… And make sure that when its all over… I Will do what you couldnt do to me… AND THATS KILL YOU!
Mark:Very Strong Words by Shawn Michaels…
Shane:Your Response William?
McConnell: You know, Shawn can talk big from behind a screen and not be here.. But I brought the fight TO HIM.. So Shawn, you can try and “kill me” at the bowl.. But you will find yourself once again faced with The Answer.. AND FLAT ON YOUR BACK.. BLOODIED.. BATTERED.. AND BEATEN..
Rhino:Look behind William…
Mark:Its SHAWN MICHAELS…
Rhino:William has no idea…
Mark:Michaels spins McConnell around and nails him with right hands…
Rhino:Look at Shawn Michaels go…
Mark:Shawn Michaels with an irish whip… PYB with a reversal… HBK ducks the clothesline… Flying Forearm Shot connects by The Showstopper…
Rhino:PYB is staggering back up to his feet…
Mark:The band is being tuned…
Rhino:It is time for some Sweet Chin Music…
Mark:SWEET CHIN MUSIC! PYB Ducks out of the way… HBK turns around… FIVE STAR SUPERKICK!
Rhino:PYB just laid out The Showstopper…
Mark:PYB is trash talking Shawn Michaels…
Rhino:This will be real interesting when they both are in the bowl together…
Mark:It sure will be… Its time for the Main Event…
EWA World Championship Lumberjack Weapons Match
Doug Kinsella(c) vs Triple H
Pa Announcer:Tonights Main Event is set for one fall and is a Lumberjack Match for the EWA World Heavyweight Championship… Introducing first… The Challenger… From Greenwich, Ct… Weighing in at 260 Pounds… The Game TRIPLE H…
(“The Game” plays as Triple H enters the arena…)
Pa Announcer:His opponent… From Dayton, Ohio… Weighing in at 241 Pounds… The Defending EWA World Heavyweight Champion… DOUG KINSELLA…
(“Pieces” plays as Doug Kinsella enters the arena…)
Mark:The Lumberjacks have surrounded the ring and Triple H and Doug Kinsella look at one another and then begin looking at the lumberjacks around the ring…
Rhino:So far around the ring are The Answer William McConnell and Heidenreich…
Mark:I also see The Products of Society standing around the ring with steel chairs…
Rhino:You can feel the tension between Doug and Triple H…
Mark:The Game goes for a right hand and connects on Doug Kinsella… Doug Kinsella goes for a right hand… Triple H blocks and he fires back with straight right hands on Doug Kinsella… The Game backs Doug Kinsella in to the ropes… Triple H with an irish whip… Doug Kinsella comes off the ropes… The Game nails him with a high back body drop…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella staggers back up on to his feet…
Mark:Triple H charges at Doug Kinsella with a clothesline… Doug Kinsella ducks and Triple H goes over the top rope and to the floor he goes…
Rhino:The Products of Society are stomping at Triple H as he is on the ground…
Mark:Triple H has no friends… The Products of Society roll him back in to the ring… Doug Kinsella with a running elbow drop… Quick cover 1……………………………..2……………………. Triple H gets his shoulder up…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now going to take advantage of what the Products of Society has done to Triple H…
Mark:Doug Kinsella now hooks up Triple H and drops him with a vertical suplex…Doug Kinsella hooks up Triple H again this time connects with a fisherman’s suplex with a bridge… Cover 1…………………….2……………….Kickout by Triple H…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now taking Triple H to the corner…
Mark:Rights and Lefts by the EWA World Champion connecting to Triple H… Doug Kinsella with an irish whip and Triple H goes hard in to the corner…Doug Kinsella charges in… The Game gets his boot up…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is checking his nose to see if he is bleeding…
Mark:Chop Block by The Game right to the right knee of Doug Kinsella…
Rhino:The Game has that look in his eye like he has something on his mind…
Mark:Triple H now grabs the right leg of Doug Kinsella and drives the knee right in to the mat…Triple H now drags Doug Kinsella over to the corner…
Rhino:This is not going to be good…
Mark:Triple H goes to the outside of the ring…
Rhino:Heidenreich and William McConnell are coming over to Triple H…
Mark:William McConnell just got up in the face of Heidenreich… Triple H rams Doug Kinsella’s right leg in to the steel ring post…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is in a lot of pain right now…
Mark:Triple H just walked over to one of the Products of Society and pulled a chair out of Jay Sabre’s hands…
Rhino:Triple H is back in the ring and has Doug Kinsella lined up…
Mark:Steel Chair Shot right to the right leg of Doug Kinsella…
Rhino:You can see the pain on Doug Kinsella’s face…
Mark:Triple H smiles and smashes the chair across the right knee again…
Rhino:The Game is enjoying dishing out the pain…
Mark:Triple H goes for a cover 1……………………….2……………… Doug Kinsella gets his shoulder up…
Rhino:The Game now has something in mind…
Mark:The Game grabs the right leg…
Rhino:I think we are going to go for the Figure Four Leg Lock…
Mark:Doug Kinsella pushes Triple H off in to the corner…
Rhino:Doug saved himself…
Mark:Doug Kinsella gets back up on to his feet…
Rhino:He is walking around very slowly…
Mark:Doug Kinsella goes for a clothesline… The Game ducks… Neckbreaker by The Game…
Rhino:Doug is back down on the canvas…
Mark:Triple H now grabs the right leg of the World Champion… Figure Four Leg Lock is locked in on Doug Kinsella…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is in a lot of pain…
Mark:Out from the back come come Chaos and Havoc…
Rhino:They both seem to be carrying Barbed Wire Baseball Bats…
Mark:Doug Kinsella is now trying to get to the ropes and is trying block the pain as he tries to get to the ropes…
Rhino:He is getting close…
Mark:Triple H moves back towards the center of the ring…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is looking like he is going to tap out…
Mark:Doug is now trying turn Triple H over…
Rhino:He almost has Triple H turned over…
Mark:Doug Kinsella turns the figure four over and now Triple H is the one in pain… Triple H now turns it quickly back the other way and both men are now in the ropes…
Rhino:Yeah you can see that Doug Kinsella is in a lot of pain…
Mark:Triple H is back up on his feet…Doug Kinsella is back up on his feet as well… Triple H charges at Doug Kinsella… Doug Kinsella collasped and Triple H goes over the top rope and lands right in front of Heidenreich…
Rhino:Heidenreich has a smile on his face…
Mark:Heidenreich picks up Triple H and attempts to put Triple H back in the ring and drops him face first on to the side of the ring…
Rhino:You can see how the wrestlers dont want to see Triple H as the World Champion…
Mark:Triple H gets rolled back in to the ring… This is buying Doug Kinsella time to recover… Triple H is back up… Doug Kinsella goes behind Triple H… German Suplex by Doug Kinsella…
Rhino:Nice Suplex…
Mark:Triple H gets back up… Another German release suplex by Doug Kinsella…
Rhino:He is doing it all on one leg…
Mark:Doug Kinsella goes for a cover 1…………………………2…………………. The Game gets his shoulder up…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now waiting for Triple H to get back up on his feet…
Mark:Triple H is now back up… SPEAR! ON THE REF!
Rhino:Triple H moved and Doug Kinsella took out the referee…
Mark:Doug Kinsella turns around… Triple H kicks him in the midsection… PEDIGREE!
Rhino:Thats it… But there is no referee…
Mark:Heidenreich is coming in to the ring…
Rhino:The Products of Society pulled Heidenreich down and are now fighting with him…
Mark:Chaos and Havoc are getting in the brawl as well…
Rhino:Doug Kinsella is staggering to his feet…
Mark:Triple H is watching the brawl…
Rhino:William McConnell is in the ring and has a sledgehammer in hand…
Mark:Who is he going to hit…
Rhino:Triple H turns around and is telling PYB not to do it…
Mark:ITS HBK! HBK has come down to the ring after being attacked earlier by PYB…
Rhino:He is heading right for PYB…
Mark:HBK just tackled PYB out of the ring and they are brawling on the outside of the ring…
Rhino:Triple H is watching that…
Mark:Doug Kinsella is back up and picked up the Sledgehammer William McConnell dropped… Triple H turns around and Doug Kinsella lays him out with the Sledgehammer…
Rhino:The Game has been laid out…
Mark:The referee is awake… Kinsella covers Triple H 1………………………………………2…………………………3………. NO! The Game got his shoulder up…
Rhino:That was very close…
Mark:Doug Kinsella can not believe he didnt get the win…
Rhino:Doug is now calling for the final touch as he has laid out a steel chair…
Mark:Triple H staggers up on to his feet…
Rhino:This could be it right here and now…
Mark:Triple H turns around… FINAL TOUCH! NO! The Game pushes him off in to the ropes… Running High Knee by The Game laying out Doug Kinsella…
Rhino:This is buying himself some time to recover…
Mark:McConnell just rolled back in to the ring…
Rhino:Shawn Michaels is following him back in…
Mark:Right hand by Triple H laying out Shawn Michaels…
Rhino:Why did he do that?
Mark:McConnell is leaving the ringside area now…
Rhino:Triple H is now going back to Doug Kinsella…
Mark:Shawn Michaels just tuned up the band…
Rhino:The referee is making sure McConnell gets out of the ring area…
Mark:Triple H turns around… SWEET CHIN MUSIC!
Rhino:Michaels really laid in to Triple H…
Mark:Doug Kinsella with a School Boy 1…………………………………2…………………………..3…….. ITS OVER!
Pa Announcer:Here is your winner and STILL EWA World Heavyweight Champion DOUG KINSELLA…
Rhino:Shawn Michaels just cost his former friend and Degeneration X member his chance at the World Heavyweight Title…
Mark:Shawn Michaels has a smile on his face… Doug Kinsella has a bigger smile on his as he has retained his title…What reaction will Triple H have after losing to Doug Kinsella… What will happen in the Extreme Bowl… Can the Products of Society pull off the upset and become EWA Tag Team Champions? So Much to get to… Plus Megumi Kudo and Subway battle one last time… We will see you at Extreme Bowl… Good Night Everyone!