Tuesday Night Carnage 06-24-03
Mark:Welcome everyone to what should be a strange… Unusual and enjoyable Tuesday Night Carnage from the Pepsi Center here in Denver, Colorado… Im Mark and you know the guy who is sitting next to me by now and that is Rhino…
Rhino:Yes it is I… Rhino…
Mark:This card has Omega’s Fingerprints all over it…
Rhino:Man who knows what is true… what is fake… who knows…
Mark:We will find it out though tonight… One thing we know is that our Main Event is a Triple Threat Match for the eWa Undisputed World Title as Shawn Michaels defends against Steve Austin and The Rock…
Rhino:We also have a Final Moments Match… For the eWa Television Championship…
Mark:Joey Armstrong will take on The Undertaker in that one… Plus we will have a Battle Royal with the winner facing Triple H in a Chain Match for the FTW Title…
Rhino:This is going to be one interesting night… Im ready…
Mark:So am I… So lets get to the ring…
Lex Luger/Tatanka vs 911/John Cena vs Camera Chaos
Pa Announcer:Tonights opening contest is set for one fall and is a three team triple threat match… Introducing first… The team of LEX LUGER and TATANKA…
(“Made in the USA” hits as Team Alf make their way to the ring…)
Pa Announcer:Their opponents…. The Team of Ned Tesseract and Jay Jixhel… CAMERA CHAOS…
(“Camera Time” hits as Camera Chaos enter the arena…)
Pa Announcer:And their opponents… The team of 911 and John Cena..
(“Word life” plays as John Cena enters the arena… “Ridin Spinners” hits as 911 enters the arena…)
Mark:Here we go… Starting it out is John Cena and Lex Luger…A test of strength in the center of the ring…
Rhino:Lex just over powered John Cena…
Mark:John Cena wants to try again… And they go back to the power of strength… And Luger over powers him again…
Rhino:Why wont John Cena give it up…
Mark:He wants to go one more time… From behind 911 takes out the leg of Lex Luger… John Cena now going to work on Lex Luger… John Cena sends him for the ride in to the ropes…
Rhino:Blind tag by Ned Tesseract…
Mark:Powerslam by Cena… Cover but the ref doesnt count as Luger is not the legal man any more as from behind Ned Tesseract goes to work on John Cena… Ned with a body slam on to Cena…
Rhino:Here comes Jay Jixel for a Double team move…
Mark:Camera Chaos goes for a double spinebuster… Countered in to a Double DDT by John Cena who now needs to make a tag to someone…
Rhino:Cena makes the tag to 911…
Mark:Clothesline by 911 on to Ned… And a clothesline to Jay Jixhel… 911 sends Ned in to the ropes…
Rhino:Blind tag by Tatanka…
Mark:And another clothesline by 911… Camera chaos each got clotheslined over the top rope and to the floor…
Rhino:Its not Tatanka and 911…
Mark:Tatanka with a thumb to the eye of 911 before he sends him in to the ropes… Back Body Drop by Tatanka as 911 backs up in to the corner…
Rhino:Here comes John Cena…
Mark:Cena gets caught off by Lex Luger…
Rhino:Cena just threw the chain in to 911… But Tatanka grabbed it…
Mark:Tatanka with the chain nails 911 right in the head…
Rhino:The ref didnt see it…
Mark:Tatanka now covers 911… 1…………………..2………………………3……… ITS OVER…
Pa Announcer:Here are your winners TATANKA AND LEX LUGER…
Rhino:Team Alf are now the number one contenders for the eWa Tag Team Championship…
Mark:Yes they are… Mistakes by the team of 911 and John Cena cost them the match… Its time for the Tag Team Title Match… So lets get to the ring…
eWa Tag Team Championship Street Fight
Halo & Kid Money(c) vs Dragon & Prodigy
Pa Announcer:This next match is set for one fall under Street Fight Rules for the eWa Tag Team Championship… Introducing first the challengers… Weighing in at 707 Pounds… The Team of DRAGON and PRODIGY…
(“are you ready for this” hits as Dragon and Prodigy enter the arena…)
Pa Announcer:Their opponents… The current and defending eWa Tag Team Champions… HALO AND KID MONEY…
(“Money Buys Everything” hits as Kid Money and Halo enter the arena…)
MarK:We are going to start things out here with Halo and Dragon in the ring…
Rhino:Remember Street Fight rules are in effect for this match…
Mark:But they still have to fight as a Tag Team… As here we go… Halo scores with a couple of right hands to the man known as Dragon… Dragon takes the shots and now fires back with a couple of his own…
Rhino:The man who almost came away with the Undisputed Title last week… Has some fire in him tonight…
Mark:Dragon now sends Halo in to the ropes and nails him with a big back body drop…
Rhino:Which sends him backing up in to the corner…
Mark:Dragon charges the corner and connects with a big splash on Halo…
Rhino:Halo is staggering…
Mark:Belly to Belly by Dragon on to Halo in the middle of the ring… As Dragon goes for a cover 1………………….2……………. Kid Money breaks it with as he dropped a fist right to the back of the head of Dragon…
Rhino:He has a chain wrapped around his fist…
Mark:Remember street fight rules… Halo is able to make the tag now and Kid Money is the ring and is stomping at the back of Dragon… Kid Money has him back up on his feet and sends him for the ride in to the ropes and connects with a beautiful dropkick…
Rhino:Halo just snuck up behind Prodigy and nailed him with a chair shot right in the back of the head…
Mark:And Prodigy hit the floor hard… Halo throws the chair in to the ring now… As Kid Money makes the tag to Halo…
Rhino:Double team attempt right now as they have the steel chair standing up in the center of the ring…
Mark:Dragon gets sent in for the ride and a double drop toe hold right in to the steel chair… As Halo now goes for a cover 1…………………..2……….. Dragon is able to get his shoulder up…
Rhino:Prodigy is not moving on the floor at the moment… He did take a nasty fall…
Mark:Halo now sends Dragon in to the corner and Halo has the chair and charges right in at Dragon but Dragon gets his foot right up… And kicks the chair right back in the face of Halo…
Rhino:Dragon is all alone at the moment…
Mark:Big Clothesline on Halo…
Rhino:Kid Money is now in the ring…
Mark:Samoan Drop by Dragon on a charging Kid Money… From Behind Halo low blows Dragon and is now putting the boots to him is Halo…
Rhino:There is now some movement from Prodigy on the floor…
Mark:Double DDT by the Tag Team Champs right on to the steel chair… Halo goes for a cover 1……………………….2…………………. Prodigy is back in and breaks it up…
Rhino:Prodigy is scoring with right hands to Kid Money…And he sent him over the top rope…
Mark:Kid Money is down on the outside… As there is a double team happening now in the ring from Dragon and Prodigy… Double flapjack by D&P on to Halo…
Rhino:The Referee is getting Prodigy out of the ring…
Mark:Baseball Bat to the back of the head of Dragon from Kid Money who rolls Halo on top of Dragon… Cover 1………………….2………………..Kid Money stops Prodigy… 3…..
Pa Announcer:Here are your winners and Still eWa Tag Team Champions HALO and KID MONEY…
Rhino:Kid Money and Halo stole the victory here tonight to keep their tag titles… But thats what every great tag team does on occassion…
Mark:Well its time for the Battle Royal… So lets get to the ring…
Battle Royal
Participants-Halo, Lone Jobber, The Rock, Demon Child, Kidman, Loco, Sabu, Vader, Jake Roberts, New Jack, and Chris Benoit
Pa Announcer:Ladies and Gentlemen this next match is a special Battle Royal for a shot at the FTW Title… Currently in the ring are eWa Superstars and Legends… LOBO… SABU… NEW JACK… DEMON CHILD… BILLY KIDMAN… VADER… Now on his way to the ring… One half of the eWa Tag Team Champions… HALO…
(“Highway to Hell” plays as Halo walks out in to the arena…)
Pa Announcer:Making his way to the ring… LONE JOBBER…
(“One is the Lonelist Number” hits as Lone Jobber enters the arena…)
Pa Announcer:Making his way to the ring… CHRIS BENOIT…
(“Whatever” plays as Chris Benoit enters the arena)
Pa Announcer:Making his way to the ring… THE ROCK…
(“Is Cookin” hits as The Rock enters the arena…)
Mark:Well here we g…
(“The Game” plays as Triple H walks out on to the stage…)
HHH:I was just sitting back there… And I have decided that why wait til later to kick all of your asses… THIS MATCH NOW… On the Authority of the Commissioner Shane McMahon is a Battle Royal… FOR MY FTW TITLE… SO RING THE BELL…
Rhino:Its now for the FTW Title…
Mark:Well the bell sounds and all the men are in the ring…
Rhino:This is going to be a hard one to call…
Mark:No doubt about that… Right now we see Triple H and he is battling Lobo in one corner…
Rhino:Lone Jobber and Demon Child are going at it near the ropes… As Jobber is opening up on Demon Child…
Mark:Jobber has some aggression to unleash here… As this is for the FTW Championship… Superkick by Lone Jobber to Demon Child and he goes flying over the top rope and to the floor…
Pa Announer:Demon Child has been eliminated…
Rhino:We have our first elimination thus far and it was everyones least favorite Demon Child…
Mark:The Rock and New Jack are going at it… The Rock with big right hands to him in the corner…
Rhino:Triple H just clotheslined Sabu over the top rope and to the floor went Sabu…
Pa Announcer:Sabu has been eliminated…
Mark:Right now we see Halo and Billy Kidman getting in to it a little bit… Halo is sent for the ride in to the ropes and a spin kick by Billy Kidman on Halo…
Rhino:The Rock just nailed New Jack with a samoan drop…
Mark:Chris Benoit and now Lone Jobber are double teaming Vader on the farside of the ring right now…
Rhino:The Rock has New Jack and he tosses him over the top rope and to the floor…
Pa Announcer:New Jack has been eliminated…
Mark:Right now we see Triple H on Billy Kidman… Triple H with right hands to him in the corner…
Rhino:The Rock and Halo are going at it in the middle of the ring… Exchanging right hands back and forth…
Mark:Neither man is giving an inch right now…
Rhino:Double clothesline by Benoit and Lone Jobber and Vader crashes down hard on the floor on the outside…
Pa Announcer:Vader has been eliminated…
Mark:Right now Halo is working on The Rock in the corner… While Triple H just nailed Billy Kidman with a big high knee…
Rhino:DDT by Jake Roberts right on to Chris Benoit who turned right around…
Mark:Jake picked his spot with that DDT…Billy Kidman has just been tossed over the top rope and to the floor by Triple H…
Pa Announcer:Billy Kidman has been eliminated…
Mark:Lone Jobber spins Jake Roberts around and nails him with a DDT…
Rhino:Listen to the fans chant DDT now… First they did it for Jake Roberts and now they did it for Lone Jobber…
Mark:The fans here tonight have been very in to the show… Let me tell you that much and we still have more to go tonight…
Rhino:Man yes they have…
Mark:Lone Jobber now tossed Jake Roberts out of the ring…
Pa Announcer:Jake Roberts has been eliminated…
Mark:The Rock sends Halo in to the ropes but The Rock gets caught in a German Suplex from behind by Chris Benoit…
Rhino:I dont believe it… Triple H and Lone Jobber are double teaming Halo… I didnt think I would see that…
Mark:Triple H and Lone Jobber send Halo for the ride in to the ropes and a double back body drop and over the top rope goes Halo…
Pa Announcer:Halo has been eliminated…
Rhino:We are down to the final four… The Rock… Triple H… Lone Jobber and Chris Benoit… All four want the FTW Title…
Mark:Only one man will be champion when its all set and done… Right now Triple H just nailed Chris Benoit with a right hand…
Rhino:The Rock blocked the right hand by Lone Jobber…
Mark:Benoit and Triple H are fighting on one side of the ring… While The Rock and Lone Jobber are fighting on the other…
Rhino:Triple H with a knee buster to Chris Benoit… Pedigree time…
Mark:LOW BLOW by Chris Benoit on to Triple H and Benoit grabs Triple H and throws him over the top rope…
Rhino:Triple H hung on to the ropes though…
Mark:Chris Benoit thinks he got rid of Triple H who is back behind him right now…
Rhino:Look out Benoit…
Mark:Benoit turns back around and Triple H tosses him over the top rope and to the floor…
Pa Announcer:Chris Benoit has been eliminated…
Rhino:We are down to the final three…
Mark:Lone Jobber gets taken down with a clothesline from The Rock…
Rhino:Triple H is just watching as The Rock and Lone Jobber battle it out…
Mark:The Rock is waiting for Lone Jobber to get up… High Knee by Triple H to The Rock and it has him stunned…
Rhino:Clothesline by Lone Jobber and The Rock goes over the top rope and to the floor…
Pa Announcer:The Rock has been eliminated…
Rhino:We are down to Triple H and Lone Jobber… Two men with history together…
Mark:Back and forth right hands at the moment… Triple H sends him for the ride in to the ropes…
Rhino:Triple H ducked his head to early i think…
Mark:Swinging neckbreaker by Lone Jobber… Jobber picks Triple H up by the hair…
Rhino:Jobber is setting him up for the Gimmick… Its been a while since we have seen that move…
Mark:Jobber has him up… Triple H counters and pushes him in to the ropes…Triple H goes for a clothesline…
Rhino:Lone Jobber ducks…
Mark:Triple H is over the top rope but is hanging on…
Rhino:Lone Jobber thinks he has won the match…
Mark:Triple H is back in the ring and he spins Lone Jobber around but Jobber blocks the right hand and scores with a couple of his own… Jobber sends him for the ride and takes him down with a clothesline…
Rhino:Lone Jobber feels it… Triple H is by the ropes as he gets back up…
Mark:Jobber charges in with a big clothesline… Triple H ducks and sends Jobber over the top rope… We have a winner…
Pa Announcer:The winner of the Battle Royal and STILL FTW Champion… TRIPLE H…
Rhino:Triple H barely survived this match up…
Mark:Triple H as walked out of here tonight with the FTW Championship… But barely… Oh man… Its now time to head out to the graveyard…
eWa Television Title Final Moments Match
Joey Armstrong(c) vs The Undertaker
Mark:We are outside the arena now… As we have set up a whole Graveyard Site outside of the Pepsi Center for this TV Title Match… As we can see now the champion Joey Armstrong is already walking around the grave site… Rhino why dont you remind the folks at home about what is going to take place in this match…
Rhino:This final moments match combines four matches… Death Match… Buried Alive… Casket Match and a graveyard match…The way to win is to knock your opponent out… Get him in the casket and bury him alive… Its real simple when you think about it…
Mark:The Undertaker and Joey Armstrong are face to face now… And here they go…
Rhino:Its just a flat out Brawl…And you wouldnt expect anything else…
Mark:The Undertaker takes over with more shots to the midsection and a big right hand that knocks him off his feet…
Rhino:Joey Armstrong needs to be vertical or he could be in some trouble…
Mark:The Undertaker is stomping him in to the hill… Giving him some nice stiff kicks to the midsection… The Undertaker now picks up Joey Armstrong and slams him down right on to the hill…
Rhino:The Undertaker is looking around for something…
Mark:The Undertaker is right at home at a gravesite… As The Undertaker has a tombstone in his hand…
Rhino:Very Symbolic…
Mark:Joey Armstrong kicks The Undertaker right in the gut as he went for a shot with the Tombstone… And now Joey Armstrong grabs the Undertaker and DDT’s him face first on to the hill…
Rhino:Joey Armstrong is just stomping away at The Undertaker at the moment…
Mark:Right now Joey Armstrong has the tombstone and cracks it right across the back of the Undertaker…
Rhino:The Undertaker is in some pain right now as Joey Armstrong is doing a number on him…
Mark:Joey Armstrong is pulling the Undertaker up the hill closer to the casket…
Rhino:Which is a smart idea…
Mark:Right hands by Joey Armstrong as he is mounted on top of him…
Rhino:Joey Armstrong has a shovel…
Mark:And a couple of shots right to the back of the Undertaker by Joey Armstrong with the shovel…
Rhino:That Shovel bent over the back of the Undertaker…
Mark:Joey Armstrong now drags a tombstone over…And DDT’s The Undertaker face first on to it…
Rhino:This isnt looking good for the Undertaker…
Mark:Joey Armstrong is going in for the kill…As he slams the Undertaker right in to that casket…
Rhino:The lid is shut and now he is lowering the casket…
Mark:Joey Armstrong has the casket placed in the grave… And now is beginning to bury The Undertaker alive…
Rhino:Its the officials call when to stop the match up…
Mark:Joey Armstrong is only a few seconds away from retaining his TV Title right now… As the Official Stops the match…
Pa Announcer:The winner and STILL eWa Television Champion… JOEY ARMSTRONG…
Rhino:Joey Armstrong has buried The Undertaker alive here tonight…
Mark:He did it all to retain his Television Championship… Right now we are heading to the ring for the main event…
WRITTEN BY HHHDABOMBHBK
(The lights in the arena go black. A voice is heard that says, “Justice isn’t blind, it’s BLACK!” Pyros go off. Can’t C Me by Tupac Shakur hits and a man by the name of Shaka Riggs comes walking out. He is wearing a purple pimped out suit, and a glove on his right hand with the fingers cut off that say justice on the back of the glove. He makes his way to the ring and begins to speak)
Shaka Riggs:Looky here Merica’, the eWa finally got a black guy here. I’m tired of watchin all dis tv wit dese whitey’s on…There is one word dat fits dis..RACISM! The eWa is racist. Look at em. There be all dese white guys, wiggers, and dirty ricans…But there be no black wrestlers…I bet though dat there be black guys in da back doing all da work for the white people. But that how things go in da white man’s world. They still think we their slaves. I tell you, I can bet dat all yall white guys down in da south wanna work me on the cotton field. I’m tired of all dis oppression dat my people had to face fo’ centuries. Heck even God is racist. I mean how come he gotta go an’ have a white light? How come the light isn’t black?…I’ll tell ya’ll. RACISM! Now it’s my time to get back at all of ya’ll…It’s gonna be time dat Shaka Riggs come into da eWa and hand out da “Pimp Slap of Justice” to all ya’ll whitey’s. It’s time to find out how many people here in da eWa are racist, and I know all of ya’ll are racist. Especially John Cena and 911…They think they can hide their racism by trying to dress up like the black man. But let me say dis. I bet if you see them on any regular day, they be at some country club playin’ tennis…A black guy come walkin’ on da field and they threaten that they go an’ call da po’lice…Now lets go ‘head and talk bout these damn ricans in da eWa…Kid Money…He probably da most racist in da eWa. Look at his people. They come to Africa and take us to be slaves, plus his people be comin’ from otha countries to come here illegally. When that little boy came over here, what was his name….Elian Gonzalas….your people couldn’t even keep his @ss here. Now if that boy would have came from Haiti they would have never took his @ss out the water in the first place. “Look, theres something floating in that boat…..oh it’s just a nigga, leave it.” Then da other guy says “What’s wrong with you?! At least take the boat.” Then they’d let the kid swim back to Haiti because of racism. I tell ya’ll dis. I will not stand up fo’ dis racism dat takes place in da eWa. Heck, there ain’t even no black announcer. Why is dat?…RACISM!…RACISM RACSIM RACISM! Once Shaka come into da ring, I go an’ show all ya’ll some justice…For Justice isn’t blind, it’s BLACK!
(Can’t C Me by Tupac hits and Shaka Riggs leaves the ring)
Rhino:Man that person is here on a mission…
Mark:Well now i guess it is time… Wait a second something is going on in the back…
Rhino:Theres The Rock and he is being attacked by DX…
Mark:Shawn Michaels and Triple H are doing a number on the Peoples Champion…
Rhino:The Rock is suppose to be involved in the main event…
Mark:Sledgehammer shot by Triple H as Shawn Michaels held him up…
Rhino:I dont think the Rock will be able to compete in the main event…
Mark:I dont think he will either as he head down to the ring now for our main event…
eWa Undisputed Championship Triple Threat Match
Shawn Michaels(c) vs The Rock vs Steve Austin
Pa Announcer:Tonights Main Event is set for one fall and is for the eWa Undisputed World Heavyweight Championship… Introducing first… The Challenger… From Victoria, Texas… Weighing in at 252 Pounds… STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN…
(“Glass Shatters” hits as Stone Cold walks to the ring…)
Pa Announcer:His opponent… From San Antonio, Texas… Weighing in at 227 Pounds… Representing Degeneration X… The Current and defending eWa Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion… The Heartbreak Kid… SHAWN MIHCAELS…
(“Boy Toy” plays as Shawn Michaels walks out in to the arena…)
Mark:Here we go… Stone Cold and Shawn Michaels face to face here in the middle of the ring…
Rhino:The trash talking has begun between the two men…
Mark:Shawn Michaels slaps the face of the challenger Stone Cold… Stone Cold laughs and then swings and connects with a couple of right hands to the champion…
Rhino:Stinging right hands by Austin…
Mark:Stone Cold whips Shawn Michaels in to the ropes and he connects with the lou thez press with right hands…
Rhino:Stone Cold is a house of fire to open up this match up…
Mark:Elbow drop by the rattlesnake… As Shawn Michaels now rolls out of the ring…
Rhino:Stone Cold was opening up a can of whoop ass on Shawn Michaels…
Mark:Michaels slowing down the pace on the outside… Shawn is walking off the attack…
Rhino:But here comes Stone Cold right out after Shawn Michaels…
Mark:Steve Austin is chasing the champion around the ring… Shawn rolls back in and catches Austin with a couple of boots as he rolled back in to the ring… Shawn Michaels now keeping the rattlesnake on the canvas at the moment…
Rhino:Good idea by the champion to keep the challenger down on the canvas…
Mark:Shawn now has Steve Austin in the corner and continues to stomp away at the Rattlesnake… Shawn Michaels now whips Stone Cold in to the farside corner…Stone Cold comes out and gets caught with a back body drop from the Heartbreak Kid…
Rhino:Stone Cold got right back up to his feet…
Mark:But gets taken down with a clothesline… As Shawn Michaels is now grinding a rear chin lock in on the challenger… As Shawn Michaels is in control…
Rhino:Shawn has set his own pace for the match up… And it is working for the champion at the moment…
Mark:Michaels has the rear chin lock hooked in good as he is wearing down the rattlesnake… Michaels lets the hold go and starts to drive some boots to the back of the rattlesnake…
Rhino:The Champion has this match up right now as he has Stone Cold set up in the corner…
Mark:The Heartbreak Kid has Stone Cold up on the top turnbuckle now and probably going for a superplex…
Rhino:Stone Cold is blocking the Superplex…
Mark:Stone Cold pushes Michaels off the top rope… And now Stone Cold comes off with a double axe handle right on Shawn Michaels who got back up to his feet…
Rhino:Both the champion and the challenger are down on the canvas…
Mark:Steve Austin is the first one back up to his feet… And nails Shawn Michales with a couple of right hands as he got back up to his… Steve Austin sends Shawn Michaels for the ride in to the ropes… And Steve Austin drives the knee right in to the midsection of the charging champion…
Rhino:Steve Austin has turned the tide somewhat…
Mark:Stone Cold now has Shawn Michaels up on his feet and gets sent in to the ropes… Spinebuster by the rattlesnake… Goes for a cover does Stone Cold 1……………………2……………. Kick out by the Heartbreak Kid…. Steve now has Michaels right back up and sent in to the corner…
Rhino:Shawn got sent in hard in to the turnbuckle…
Mark:Stone Cold nails Michaels with a kick to the midsection as he came out of the corner… Stunner… NO… Blocked by Michaels… And Michaels nails him with a clothesline…
Rhino:There is some sort of disruption going on in the crowd…
Mark:Some fan just hopped over the railing and this has Shawn Michaels distracted… This fan just kissed Shawn Michaels…
Rhino:OH MY GOD… ITS PYB… What the hell is he doing here and what the hell did he just do…
Mark:Michaels has some strange look on his face on what just happened…Roll up by Stone Cold 1……………………….2…………………… Kickout by Shawn Michaels…
Rhino:PYB almost cost Shawn Michaels the eWa Undisputed Title…
Mark:Stone Cold with a couple of right hands to Shawn Michaels as he sends him back in to the ropes… Austin goes for the Lou Thez Press and connects with right hands…
Rhino:Stone Cold is calling for the Stunner…
Mark:Stunner blocked again by Michaels who sends Stone Cold in to the ropes… SWEET CHIN MUSIC by HBK… Cover 1………………………..2…………………3……..
Pa Announcer:Here is your winner and STILL eWa Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion… SHAWN MICHAELS…
Rhino:The Heartbreak Kid retains… But what the hell is up with PYB…
Mark:I have no idea… But he almost cost Shawn the title…
Rhino:This has been a wild night…
Mark:The eWa will continue on next event with World Rush… Seven Continents… Seven Matches… Til then… GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE…
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