New Years Evil 2004
Mark:Welcome Everyone to the end of the year spectular known as New Years Evil… And we are live in New York City at the Worlds Most Famous Arena…And I am joined by the eWa Undisputed Champion Al Snow… Al, tonight you have a big time match up…
Al Snow:Yes I do… I will be fighting one half of the former Next Level, Eric Stryker… And I am ready for it Mark…
Mark:Its going to be our Main Event and it will be a Guiding Light Match Up… But that is part one of our main event… The second part of the main event is going to be a joint brand match up… As Triple H battles eWa Champion Vertigo…
Al Snow:Its going to be non title, but its going to feature blood, sweat and violence…
Mark:The official listing is a Three Falls Barbwire Exploding Musical Chairs Lumberjack Bed of Nails Death Match…
Al Snow:That is going to be something that everyone will remember for a very long time…
Mark:This is going to be a wild night, you ready Al?
Al Snow:Im ready…
Mark:Then lets kick this night off with a very interesting tag team contest…
The Dark One & Berserk Vs. Jeff Hardy & Frankie Kazarian
Kitana Baker:Our opening contest is a Tag Team Match set for one fall… Introducing first… Team Number One… At a combined weight of 610 Pounds… THE DARK ONE & BERSERK…
(“Down In The Dark” by Nirvana plays as The Dark One & Berserk enter the arena…)
Kitana Baker:Introducing their opponents… Part of The Network… At a combined weight of 437 Pounds… JEFF HARDY & FRANKIE KAZARIAN…
(“Future” plays as Jeff Hardy & Frankie Kazarian enter the arena…)
Mark:Dark One and Jeff Hardy are starting off here in the opening moments of this match up… Hardy hammers The Dark One with a couple of forearm shots backing him in to the ropes…Irish whip to the farside… Hardy ducks his head and The Dark One nails him with a swinging neckbreaker…
Al Snow:The Dark One saw the move coming and was able to counter it…
Mark:Jeff Hardy is back up on his feet… Dark One goes for a kick to the gut… Jeff Hardy grabs his foot and spins him around and nails him with a clothesline…
Al Snow:The Dark One was caught off guard with that one…
Mark:Jeff Hardy now grabs Dark One’s leg and drops his legs in between the legs of Dark One…
Al Snow:Jeff went way down stairs with that shot…
Mark:Jeff Hardy pushes Dark One towards his corner and tags in Frankie Kazarian…
Al Snow:Mark, Frankie has the chance to be a great star on the monthly crew… Some say he is the future of this business…
Mark:You could be right about that one… As Kazarian with a couple of kicks to the midsection of Dark One… Kazarian hooks him up and nails him with a brainbuster driving the Dark One straight down in to the canvas…Kazarian goes for a cover 1………………………2…………………… Berserk comes in and breaks it up…
Al Snow:Berserk wasn’t going to let the match up end that way…
Mark:Kazarian whips Dark One in to the ropes… Kazarian goes for a spin heel kick but the Dark One ducks out of the way and Kazarian hit nothing but canvas…
Al Snow:Berserk is reaching out for a tag…
Mark:And Berserk gets the tag from The Dark One… Kazarian gets back up on his feet and Berserk charges and nails him in the corner with a big splash…
Al Snow:That’s gotta hurt…
Mark:Berserk now hooks up Kazarian and drops him with a samoan drop… Cover by Berserk 1……………………………2……………………………Frankie gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Frankie is hurting right now as Berserk is just over powering him…
Mark:Berserk now scoops up and slams Kazarian down to the canvas…
Al Snow:Berserk is standing on the middle rope…
Mark:Berserk comes splashing down off the middle rope right on to Frankie Kazarian…
Al Snow:That was sorta like the Vader Bomb…
Mark:Berserk goes for a cover 1………………………………….2…………………… Jeff Hardy comes in and breaks it up…
Al Snow:The momentum has really turned in the favor of The Dark One and Berserk…
Mark:Berserk tags out and in comes Dark One… Dark One hooks up Frankie Kazarian… Modified backbreaker by The Dark One… Another cover 1…………………..2…………………Kazarian gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:When you look at the Network corner you can see the frustration on the face of Jeff Hardy… As he wants to get in to this match up…
Mark:Berserk gets tagged back in by The Dark One and just nails with a couple of right hands…
Al Snow:Berserk is looking to end this thing…
Mark:Hard Irish whip in to the ropes… SEVER SOUL! NO! Frankie Kazarian moves out of the way and Berserk hits the corner hard…
Al Snow:Kazarian is now trying to make his way to the corner…
Mark:The Dark One is tagged back in…
Al Snow:Jeff Hardy wants in so badly…
Mark:And now he is… As Frankie makes the tag… Dark One goes for a clothesline… Ducked by Hardy and he nails Dark One with right hands…
Al Snow:Berserk is in the ring…
Mark:Dropkick by Jeff Hardy staggering Berserk in to the ropes…
Al Snow:Kazarian is back in…
Mark:Double Dropkick by Hardy and Kazarian knocking Berserk over the top rope and to the floor…
Al Snow:Watch out Jeff…
Mark:From behind Jeff Hardy gets nailed by The Dark One…Kazarian leaps over the top rope and lands right on top of Berserk…
Al Snow:The Dark One is setting up Jeff Hardy for the Dark Calling…
Mark:Jeff Hardy counters the Dark Calling…Twist of fate by Jeff Hardy…
Al Snow:Hardy is now heading to the top rope…
Mark:SWANTON BOMB! Connects…
Al Snow:That’s gotta be it…
Mark:Jeff Hardy with the cover on The Dark One 1…………………………….2…………………………NO! Berserk got back in to break it up…
Al Snow:I can not believe it…
Mark:Terry Funk is coming out from the back…
Al Snow:Funk looks pissed off…
Mark:Terry Funk is standing on the apron and he has the branding iron in his hand…
Al Snow:Frankie just got the tag from Jeff Hardy…
Mark:Frankie is now behind Berserk and is holding him open for Terry Funk…
Al Snow:The branding iron is on fire…
Mark:Funk blows the flames… Berserk moves and the fire ball catches Frankie in the face…
Al Snow:Kazarian is blinded…
Mark:Berserk with the roll up 1……………………..2…………………………3…… ITS OVER!
Kitana Baker:Here are your winners DARK ONE and BERSERK…
Al Snow:Terry Funk’s fire ball backfired…
Mark:Yes it did..This was a very interesting way to start off a night that is shaping up to be one hell of a night… As we send it back down to Kitana for the introductions…
Darien Vs. Doug Kinsella
Kitana Baker:This next contest is set for one fall… Introdrucing first… From Glen Burnie, Md… Weighing in at 239 Pounds… DARIEN…
(“The Way You Like It” plays as Darien enters the arena…)
Kitana Baker:His opponent… From Dayton, Ohio… Weighing in at 241 Pounds… A Member of the Third World Empire… DOUG KINSELLA…
(“The End” by Linkin Park as Doug Kinsella walks in to the arena…)
Mark:The bell sounds and this match up is underway…Doug Kinsella gets up in the face of Darien and nails him with a straight right hand…
Al Snow:He just went straight up to Darien and nailed him right in the jaw…
Mark:Doug goes for another right hand… Blocked by Darien…Who nails Doug with a couple of right hands…
Al Snow:Darien is now opening up on Doug after Doug landed the first blow…
Mark:Kick to the midsection by Darien and he hooks him up and nails him with a vertical suplex…Darien now goes behind Doug Kinsella now and tries to go for a german suplex… Doug blocks and nails him with elbows to the back of the head… Kinsella goes behind Darien and he takes down Darien…
Al Snow:Doug is trying to out wrestle Darien here in the early going…
Mark:Doug drops an elbow to the lower back of Darien… Kinsella picks up Darien and drops him with a backbreaker… Doug goes for a quick cover 1…………………….2………………. Darien kicks out…
Al Snow:Right now Doug is in control… But the momentum can turn any moment…
Mark:Doug whips Darien in to the ropes… Tilt a whirl slam by Doug Kinsella driving Darien straight in the canvas…
Al Snow:That was a vicious move by Doug Kisnella…
Mark:Kinsella goes for a cover 1…………………………2…………….. Darien gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Close one there…
Mark:Doug now whips Darien in to the ropes… Kinsella goes for a clothesline… Ducked by Darien and he comes back and nails Doug with a couple of right hands… Darien goes behind Doug Kinsella and he nails him with a release german suplex…
Al Snow:That was one hell of a suplex and we are learning lately Darien has a lot of suplexs in his arsenal…
Mark:Darien now hooks up Doug Kinsella… T-Bone Suplex sending Doug Kinsella half way across the ring…
Al Snow:That was one move that Tazz made famous back in ECW…
Mark:Darien goes for a cover 1……………………………2…………………………Doug Kinsella gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Close fall right there…
Mark:Darien now backs up Doug Kinsella in to the corner and drives his shoulder in to his chest…
Al Snow:Darien is really working him over now…
Mark:Darien lifts up Doug Kinsella up and puts him up on the top rope…
Al Snow:Darien is now going to take a chance to really make a big splash in this contest…
Mark:Darien hooks up Doug Kinsella… Superplex by Darien driving Doug Kinsella down to the center of the ring…
Al Snow:Everything is going Dariens way right now…
Mark:Darien hooks the leg 1…………………………………2……………………………….3….. NO! Doug Kinsella got his shoulder up…
Al Snow:That was close… Darien thought he had the win but it is not to be right now…
Mark:Darien is signaling for the end…Doug Kinsella staggers back up to his feet…
Al Snow:Doug is in a bad position right now…
Mark:Darien has him up… EMBRACE THE DAR… NO! Doug Kinsella gets out and pushes Darien in to the ropes… Darien comes off and both men collide in the center of the ring…
Al Snow:They cracked skulls and are rolling around on the canvas…
Mark:Darien is the first one back up…
Al Snow:Doug is back up as well…
Mark:Darien goes for a suplex… Blocked by Doug Kinsella and Doug takes him over with a fisherman suplex… Cover 1………………..2……………………Kickout by Darien…
Al Snow:Doug almost caught Darien off guard…
Mark:Doug now lines up Darien… IMPACT DR… NO! Darien pushes him off in to the ropes… Spinebuster by Darien driving Doug Kinsella straight in to the mat…
Al Snow:If I were Darien I would go for the cover right now…
Mark:Darien with the cover 1……………………………2………………………..3……NO! Doug Kinsella gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Very Very Close…
Mark:Darien now hooks up Doug Kinsella… Doug blocks his move… Doug spins him around… IMPACT DROP!
Al Snow:Doug has just laid out Darien…
Mark:Kinsella hooks the leg 1……………………………2…………………………3……..Its Over…
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner DOUG KINSELLA…
Al Snow:Doug somehow pulled this one out Mark…
Mark:Darien put up a fight but it wasn’t enough…
Al Snow:Someone just hopped the rail…
Mark:Raven has hit the ring and just laid out Doug Kinsella with the steel chair…
Al Snow:Why did Raven lay out Doug Kinsella?
Mark:Who knows… But right now we have to get set for our next match up…
Prodigy Vs. Joe Mazaranno
Kitana Baker:This next contest is set for one fall… Introducing first…From Beech Grove,Indiana…Weighing in at 286 Pounds… JOE MAZARANNO…
(“Let the bodies hit the floor” plays as Joe Mazaranno enters the arena…)
Kitana Baker:His opponent… From Dallas,Tx… Weighing in at 375 Pounds… PRODIGY…
(“Are you ready for this” plays as Prodigy enters the arena…)
Mark:The bell sounds and this match up is under way… Prodigy nails Joe Mazaranno with a couple of right hands knocking him back in to the corner… Prodigy opens up and stomps away at the midsection of Joe Mazaranno…
Al Snow:Prodigy is coming out and opening up on Joe Mazaranno…
Mark:Mazaranno gets sent hard in to the corner… Prodigy follows him right in and takes him out with a running clothesline…
Al Snow:Prodigy is showing the eWa right now that he means business since he lost the television championship…
Mark:Prodigy now scoops up and drives Joe Mazaranno in to mat with a running powerslam…
Al Snow:Joe is in a lot of trouble right now…
Mark:Prodigy covers Joe Mazaranno 1……………………..2………………….. Joe Mazaranno gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Very very close…
Mark:Joe Mazaranno staggers up to his feet and Prodigy with a couple of right hands backing him up in to the ropes… Irish whip by Prodigy… Reversal by Joe Mazaranno and Mazaranno takes Prodigy over with a hiptoss…
Al Snow:Impressive he just hip tossed almost four hundred pounds…
Mark:Prodigy gets back up… Spinebuster by Joe Mazaranno…
Al Snow:Joe is starting his comeback…
Mark:Joe Mazaranno goes for a cover 1…………………………2………………………….. Prodigy gets his shoulder up… Joe Mazaranno now backs Prodigy up in to the corner and drives his shoulder in to the midsection of Prodigy… Mazaranno opens up and nails Prodigy with hard knife edge chops…
Al Snow:I guess this is the WOOOO! Part of the show…
Mark:Yes it is… Mazaranno hooks up Prodigy… Implant DDT…
Al Snow:Nice move…
Mark:Joe Mazaranno goes for a cover 1…………………………….2…………………………….3…. NO! Prodigy gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:The tide has turned in the favor of Joe Mazaranno…But it might not last…
Mark:Joe Mazaranno now puts Prodigy up on the top rope…
Al Snow:Prodigy is in some trouble…
Mark:Mazaranno goes for a superplex… Blocked by Prodigy and Prodigy knocks him off the rope and back down to the canvas…
Al Snow:A four hundred pound man is standing on the top rope… And that is never a good thing…
Mark:No it isn’t…
Al Snow:This is not going to be good for anyone…
Mark:Splash from the top rope by Prodigy connects and he lands right on top of Joe Mazaranno…
Al Snow:I don’t think we are going to be seeing anymore of Joe Mazaranno…
Mark:Prodigy goes for a cover 1…………………………………2……………………………3…… NO! Joe Mazaranno gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:I cant believe he kicked out…
Mark:Prodigy is now setting up Joe Mazaranno up on the top rope…
Al Snow:Could be time for the Prodical Sun…
Mark:Prodigy has him hooked… Blocked by Joe Mazaranno and he knocks Prodigy off the rope…
Al Snow:Joe Mazaranno is now standing on the top rope…
Mark:SWANTON BOMB! Cover by Joe Mazaranno 1……………………..2……………………….3…. This one is over…
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner Joe Mazaranno…
Al Snow:Some how Joe Mazaranno pulled this one out…
Mark:Someone has just hit the ring out from the back…
Al Snow:He looks familiar but who is it?
Mark:Powerbomb to Joe Mazaranno…
Al Snow:I think I know who it is… Its Crazed Maniac…
Mark:I think your right…And he has picked up a microphone…
Crazed Maniac:Here I am… Like I said before… I will make an impact… I am here to make a impact… and that is what i am going to do… Crazed Maniac is back folks… The man who lost to Sara Mack is back… But that is the past… hell that was two years ago… Now it’s time to get payback… and like they say… Pay back is a bitch! I may go after FTW or Christian’s TV Championship…But right now I am here to make AN IMPACT!
Mark:Hes back…Who knows what he may do… But right now we have to get back to the ring for our next match up…
Open Contract Match
John Heidenreich Vs. Lone Jobber
Kitana Baker:This next contest is set for one fall and is an Open Contract Match…Introducing first… From the Slaughter House… Weighing in at 235 Pounds… LONE JOBBER…
(“One is the Loneiest Number” plays as Lone Jobber walks in to the arena…)
Kitana Baker:His opponent…From New Orleans… Weighing in at 275 Pounds… Accompanied to the ring by Sid… HEIDRENREICH…
(“Dangerous Politics” plays as Heidenreich and Sid enter the arena…)
Mark:Here we go…
Al Snow:Mark, Heidenreich can be a dangerous man and I know I wouldn’t want to be in the ring with him…
Mark:But you aren’t… Lone Jobber is and Lone Jobber gets up in the face of Heidenreich…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber just slapped Heidenreich in the face… Which I think is a bad move…
Mark:Heidenreich with a couple of right hands now to Lone Jobber… Lone Jobber comes back with a couple of his own… As he backs the dangerous Heidenreich in to the ropes… Irish whip by Lone Jobber… Jobber goes for and connects with a dropkick to Heidenreich catching him square in the jaw…
Al Snow:That’s going to give Heidenreich a wake up call…
Mark:Heidenreich is back up on his feet and Lone Jobber connects with another dropkick sending Heidenreich over the top rope and to the floor he goes…
Al Snow:Heidenreich is very pissed off now… As you can see that Sid is trying to get him back under control and get him focused back on the match up at hand…
Mark:Lone Jobber slingshots himself over the top rope and he lands right on top of Heidenreich…
Al Snow:Remember years ago the classic RamShamBo Match up between Lone Jobber and Sid… That was great…
Mark:That’s going eWa old school there… But right now back to the action at hand Lone Jobber rolls Heidenreich back in to the ring…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber is setting up Heidenreich for something as he is standing on the apron…
Mark:Slingshot Leg Drop by Lone Jobber to Heidenreich… Jobber goes for a cover 1………………………2…………………. Kickout by Heidenreich…
Al Snow:Right now I must say I am impressed with the effort shown by Lone Jobber… He didn’t back down for Heidenreich… Like many have in the past…
Mark:Lone Jobber now hooks up the monster Heidenreich and drops him straight back down to the mat with a vertical suplex… Lone Jobber floats over in to a cover 1…………………………2…………………. Heidenreich gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber is now heading to the top rope…
Mark:Heidenreich is back up on his feet and he catches Lone Jobber while he is up on the top rope and launches him off the top and straight down to the canvas goes Lone Jobber…
Al Snow:The high risk chance backfired for Lone Jobber…
Mark:Lone Jobber makes his way back up on to his feet and Heidenreich backs him up in to the corner and nails him with shots to the chest… Rights and lefts to the midsection of Lone Jobber…
Al Snow:Heidenreich continues to throw more and more shots…
Mark:Heidenreich with a hard irish whip in to the corner… Heidenreich goes charging in and he runs in to the boot of Lone Jobber… Heidenreich now staggers around as Lone Jobber stands up on the middle rope and leaps at Heidenreich… Heidenreich catches Lone Jobber in midair…
Al Snow:That backfired…
Mark:Bear hug by Heidenreich to Lone Jobber…
Al Snow:Heidenreich is trying to squeeze the life out of Lone Jobber…
Mark:The referee checks on Lone Jobber…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber is fading…
Mark:The arm is lifted up for the third time… And Lone Jobber is still in it…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber is biting Heidenreich forehead…
Mark:That’s one way to get out of a bear hug… Lone Jobber nails Heidenreich with a couple of right hands backing him up in to the ropes… Heidenreich comes off the far side and Lone Jobber catches him with a dropkick straight to the jaw…
Al Snow:Heidenreich is right back up on his feet…
Mark:Lone Jobber with a kick to the midsection… DD-NO… Heidenreich rams Lone Jobber back in to the corner…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber is holding on to his back as he is coming out of the corner…
Mark:Heidenreich hooks up Lone Jobber… SitDown Powerbomb by Heidenreich… Heidenreich goes for a cover 1……………………….2……………….. Lone Jobber kicks out…
Al Snow:Sid is telling Heidenreich to punish Lone Jobber…
Mark:Heidenreich picks him up… Counter by Lone Jobber in to a small package 1……………………..2…………………………3…. NO! Heidenreich kicks out before the three…
Al Snow:Lone Jobber almost stole it…
Mark:Lone Jobber whips Heidenreich in to the ropes… Reversal by Heidenreich… SPINNING SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover 1………………………..2………………………..3……… ITS OVER!
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner HEIDENREICH…
Al Snow:Heidenreich felt it was time to end it and he did…
Mark:Heidenreich now has a chance to go after whatever gold he chooses… As we get set for our next match up…
EWA Television Championship TLC (Tables, Ladders & Chairs) Match
Christian(c) Vs. Payne Killer
Kitana Baker:This next contest is a TABLES, LADDERS and CHAIRS MATCH… And this match up is for the eWa Television Championship… Introducing first… The Challenger… From Selma, Ca… Weighing in at 265 Pounds… A Member of the Third World Empire… PAYNE KILLER…
(“Jesus Walks” plays throughout the arena…)
Al Snow:Where is Payne Killer?
Mark:I have no idea…
(“Just Close Your Eyes” plays as Christian walks in to the arena…)
Kitana Baker:Making his way to the ring… The eWa Television Champion… From Toronto, Canada… CHRISTIAN…
Mark:We have to remember that Payne Killer was taken out by his own brother Frank Santos…
Al Snow:Thats right… I guess this match up is not going to take place after all…
Mark:Christian is telling the referee to ring the bell and he is going to go after his gold…
Al Snow:Christian is bringing the ladder in to the ring and he is going to get his gold back…
Mark:Christian now is goi…
(The lights go out..”Thou Shall” plays over the p/a system as a purple spotlight shines high on the ceiling of the arena..Paynekillers body is crucified to the cross as it starts to come down)
Mark:Thats…Thats PAYNE KILLER…
Al Snow:That doesnt look like the Payne Killer we have gotten to know…
Mark:Payne Killer is out…his body looks so pale and weak..
Al Snow:Lifeless, is the word
Mark:The cross is coming down..
Al Snow:That cross is hooking the championship
Mark:IT’S OVER..NEW CHAMPION…The Cross has come down and has taken the championship…
Al Snow:Mark? Our champion…Seems…Um… Dead…
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner and NEW eWa Television Champion… PAYNE KILLER…
Al Snow:How can we have a Television Champion that is dead?
Mark:The former Television Champion Christian can not believe what just happen and neither can these people…The lights have gone out again and the cross is gone…
Al Snow:That was strange…
Mark:Well lets get back to the ring for our next contest…
The Retro Playa Vs. Big Daddy Ace
Kitana Baker:This next contest is set for one fall… Introducing first… From Chicago, Illinois… Weighing in at 234 Pounds… THE RETRO PLAYA…
(“Play That Funky Music” by Wild Cherry plays as The Retro Playa enters the arena…)
Kitana Baker:His opponent… From Boston, Mass… Weighing in at 273 Pounds… BIG DADDY ACE…
(“Sinister Tech” by Tch N9ne plays as Big Daddy Ace enters the arena…)
Mark:Here we go… Retro Playa locks up with a collar and elbow tie up with Big Daddy Ace…Both men are battling for their position… Ace backs Retro Playa in to the ropes and nails Retro Playa with a right hand… Retro Playa comes back and nails Big Daddy Ace with a straight right hand…
Al Snow:Both men are brawling back and forth…
Mark:Both men are hammering one another back in to the center of the ring… Retro Playa with a thumb to the eye and goes for a side headlock… Retro Playa continues to grind it in on Big Daddy Ace… Ace pushes Retro Playa off in to the ropes… Retro Playa comes off the ropes and knocks down Big Daddy Ace…
Al Snow:Ace gets right back up on his feet…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace tells Retro Playa to knock him down again…
Al Snow:Retro Playa is going to do it again…
Mark:Another shoulder block by Retro Playa knocking down Big Daddy Ace one more time…
Al Snow:Ace stands up and says do it again…
Mark:Retro Playa comes off the ropes… Big Daddy Ace takes the shoulder block head on and this time he stays up on his feet…
Al Snow:Ace is now coming off the ropes…
Mark:Shoulder Block by Big Daddy Ace and he knocks down Retro Playa… Big Daddy Ace doesn’t wait for Retro Playa to get back up on his feet and he drops an elbow to the upper back of Retro Playa…
Al Snow:Big Daddy Ace is now working over Retro Playa keeping him on the ground which is good strategy…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace now drives his knees to the back of Retro Playa…
Al Snow:Looks like Ace has a strategy and that’s working on the back of Retro Playa…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace hooks up Retro Playa and nails Retro Playa with a back breaker… Big Daddy Ace picks him up again and drives him in to his knee again with another back breaker…
Al Snow:Those are vicious backbreakers…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace now covers Retro Playa 1…………………………………2……………………… Retro Playa gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Retro Playa is in some trouble as Big Daddy Ace is dominating this match up…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace now with a back breaker submission… Bending Retro Playa’s back across his knee…
Al Snow:That has to hurt…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace now delivers another back breaker before going for a cover 1……………………2……………………Retro Playa gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:Big Daddy Ace is now heading up to the top rope…
Mark:Retro Playa runs in to the ropes and knocks down Big Daddy Ace…
Al Snow:This is Retro Playa’s chance to get back in this match up…
Mark:Retro Playa has Big Daddy Ace hooked… CUTTING EDGE!
Al Snow:That’s gotta be it… I believe Big Daddy Ace is knocked out cold…
Mark:Here is the cover 1…………………………….2………………………3…… NO! Big Daddy Ace got his foot on the rope…
Al Snow:Retro Playa can not believe it… He thought he had this match up won…
Mark:Retro Playa now hammers Big Daddy Ace back in to the corner with a couple of right hands… Retro Playa with a hard irish whip… Big Daddy Ace comes out of the corner and Retro Playa nails Big Daddy Ace with a power slam… Here is the cover 1………………………2…………….. Big Daddy Ace gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:This match up has been turned right in to the favor of Big Daddy Ace…
Mark:Retro Playa now backs Big Daddy Ace in to the corner again…
Al Snow:I believe Retro Playa is looking to finish Big Daddy Ace off with another Cutting Edge…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace is setup on the top rope…
Al Snow:Retro Playa has him hooked…
Mark:CUTTING ED… Big Daddy Ace blocks… And shoves Retro Playa off the rope and back down to the canvas…
Al Snow:Big Daddy Ace is now standing on the top rope…
Mark:Missle Dropkick by Big Daddy Ace connecting on Retro Playa…
Al Snow:That was a nice move…
Mark:Retro Playa is now staggering back up on to his feet…
Al Snow:Big Daddy Ace is now moving in for the kill…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace hooks him up… ACE CRUSHER! Here is the cover 1…………………………………2…………………………………3…….. ITS OVER!
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner BIG DADDY ACE…
Al Snow:It looks like Big Daddy Ace is back with a vengeance…
Mark:Big Daddy Ace is back…The eWa be ready for Big Daddy Ace… The tag team titles are on the line next…
Al Snow:Will Payne Killer be involved?
Mark:Lets head to the ring to find out…
EWA Tag Team Championship Match
Third World Empire(c) Vs. New Blood Rising
Kitana Baker:This next contest is a Tag Team Match and is for the eWa Tag Team Championship… Introducing first… The Challengers… Weighing in at 445 Pounds… Ryan Stevens and Randy Orton… NEW BLOOD RISING…
(“Take What’s Mine” plays as Randy Orton and Ryan Stevens enter the arena…)
Kitana Baker:And their opponents… Representing The Third World Empire… The eWa Tag Team Champions… PAYNE KILLER and SUBWAY…
(“Hits from the bong” plays as Subway enters the arena…)
Al Snow:It looks like this one is going to be a handicap match…
Mark:I guess so… We saw what looked to be Payne Killer earlier when he won the eWa Television Championship but I don’t think we will be seeing him again…
Al Snow:Well Subway has an uphill battle if he wants to keep the tag team titles…
Mark:Subway gets up in the face of Randy Orton… Orton nails Subway with a couple of uppercuts backing him up in to the ropes… Randy Orton whips Subway in to the ropes… Reversal by Subway… Orton comes off the ropes and Subway takes out with a clothesline…
Al Snow:The X-Core Solider is looking to take over…
Mark:Subway backs Randy Orton in to the corner and opens up with forearm shots… Subway whips Randy Orton off in to the farside corner… Orton comes out of the corner… Subway goes for a clothesline ducked by Randy Orton… Orton spins Subway around and nails him with a clothesline…
Al Snow:Ryan Stevens is reaching out for a tag and gets one from Randy Orton…
Mark:The New Blood Rising with a double suplex to Subway… Stevens goes for a quick cover 1……………………..2…………….. Kickout by Subway…
Al Snow:Ryan Stevens just slammed Subway straight down to the canvas…
Mark:Ryan Stevens is heading to the top rope…
Al Snow:Subway is staggering back up on to his feet…
Mark:High Crossbody by Ryan Stevens… 1…………………2………………….Kickout by Subway…
Al Snow:Subway is being backed up in to the New Blood Rising Corner…
Mark:Randy Orton is tagged back in by Ryan Stevens… Double clothesline by Stevens and Orton…
Al Snow:Subway is not looking good right now…
Mark:Randy Orton hooks up Subway and connects with a modified backbreaker… Orton goes for a cover 1………………………2……………. Once again Subway kicks out…
Al Snow How much more can Subway take? He has to defend the FTW Title later on tonight as well…
Mark:Randy Orton now tags back in Ryan Stevens… Stevens and Orton whip Subway in to the ropes… Both men drop their head… Subway puts on the breaks… Double DDT by Subway to Ryan Stevens and Randy Orton…
Al Snow:What a move by Subway… This is a chance for him to regroup and find away to get back in to this match up…
Mark:Randy Orton is up and Subway clotheslines him over to the top rope and to the floor goes the Legend Killer…
Al Snow:Ryan Stevens is up behind Subway…
Mark:Belly to back suplex by Ryan Stevens driving Subway back in to the mat…
Al Snow:So much for Subway’s momentum…
Mark:Stevens goes for another cover 1……………………….2………………. Subway kicks out… Ryan Stevens backs Subway in to the corner… Hard Irish whip in to the farside… Ryan Stevens charges in…Subway moves out of the way… And Ryan Stevens crashes in to the corner…
Al Snow:Subway is regrouping…
Mark:Ryan Stevens is staggering around…SUBLINE!
Al Snow:Ryan Stevens has been laid out by Subway… But Subway used all of his strength to hit the Subline…
Mark:Subway crawls over to Ryan Stevens… Cover 1………………………….2……………………….3…… NO! Randy Orton comes in to break it up…
Al Snow:Subway almost had the match up won by Randy Orton stopped it from happening…
Mark:Randy Orton with uppercuts to Subway…
Al Snow:Randy Orton has him lined up…
Mark:RK-NO! Subway pushes him in to the ropes… SUBLINE!
Al Snow:Randy Orton has been laid out…
Mark:Ryan Stevens is staggering back up… Subway charges… SUBLINE!
Al Snow:Subway is going to do it…
Mark:Subway with a cover 1……………………………….2…………………………3…ITS OVER!
Kitana Baker:Here is your winners and STILL eWa Tag Team Champions Payne Killer and SUBWAY…
Al Snow:Subway did it…He found a way to get the job done…And is still the tag team champions…
Mark:We will see Subway later on as he defends the FTW Championship… But its time for our next contest…
EWA Women’s Championship Open Invitational
Chyna Vs. Lita Vs. Megumi Kudo Vs. Trisa
Kitana Baker:This next contest is an Over the Top Battle Royal and is for the eWa WOMENS CHAMPIONSHIP… Introducing first… From Yonkers, NY… Weighing in at 110 Pounds… TRISA…
(“Scream” by Dale Oliver plays as Trisa enters the arena…)
Kitana Baker:Her opponent…From Koshigaya… Weighing in at 132 Pounds…MEGUMI KUDO…
(“It Came From Japan” by The Von Bondies plays as Megumi Kudo enters the arena…)
Kitana Baker:And their opponent… From Ft. Lauderdale, Florida… Weighing in at 137 Pounds… LITA…
(“Love Fury Passsion Energy” plays as Lita walks in to the arena…)
Kitana Baker:And their opponent… From Londonderry, NH…Weighing in at 180 Pounds… CHYNA…
(“Who I am” plays as Chyna enters the arena…)
Mark:The bell sounds and this match up is under way…
Al Snow:Its four women, one championship… This should be very interesting…
Mark:Chyna and Megumi Kudo are face to face in the center of the ring… Chyna goes to slap Megumi Kudo in the face… Megumi Kudo blocks and comes back and nails Chyna with a couple of kicks to the midsection…Backing up Chyna in to the corner…
Al Snow:Lita just kicked Trisa in the midsection and took her over with a monkey flip…
Mark:Chyna blocks the kick from Megumi Kudo… And trips down to the canvas and begins choking away at Megumi Kudo… Meanwhile Lita brings Trisa over to the corner and is now climbing up the ropes…Lita begins to hammer Trisa with right hands…
Al Snow:The crowd is counting along…
Crowd:Four… Five…Six… Seven… Eight… Nine… Ten…
Al Snow:Lita is on a roll…
Mark:DDT by Chyna to Megumi Kudo… Lita is now trying to lift up Trisa over the top rope but from behind Chyna nails Lita with a clothesline…
Al Snow:This has been brewing for a while now between these two women…
Mark:Chyna whips Lita in to the ropes…Lita ducks the clothesline and comes off the ropes and nails Chyna with a flying forearm shot…
Al Snow:Lita has a lot of fire in her right now…
Mark:Megumi Kudo went to go after Trisa but Trisa nailed Megumi Kudo with a stiff kick right to the head…
Al Snow:Trisa is not one of the better women wrestlers…But she is one tough girl…
Mark:Trisa now charges in at Megumi Kudo… Megumi Kudo sees Trisa coming and nails her with a back body drop…
Al Snow:Lita just tried to nail Chyna with a twist of fate but Chyna countered and she got nailed with a clothesline…
Mark:Megumi Kudo now hooks up Trisa… KUDOME DRIVER!
Al Snow:Trisa has been laid out by Megumi Kudo…
Mark:Chyna now goes over to the ropes and tries to send Lita over the rope… But Lita nails Chyna with a back elbow… On the other side of the ring Megumi Kudo sends Trisa over the top rope and Trisa is eliminated…
Kitana Baker:Trisa has been eliminated…
Al Snow:We are now down to three women… Lita, Chyna and Megumi Kudo…
Mark:Megumi Kudo now goes behind Chyna and lifts her up… Chyna blocks the suplex and nails Megumi Kudo with a swinging neckbreaker…
Al Snow:Lita with a burst of energy tries to throw Chyna over the top rope but Chyna put on the breaks…
Mark:Chyna hooks up Lita… DDT by The Ninth Wonder of the World…
Al Snow:Megumi Kudo is now back up on her feet…
Mark:Megumi Kudo charges in at Chyna… Chyna with a back drop… Megumi Kudo lands on the apron…
Al Snow:Lita is back up…
Mark:Lita charges in at Chyna… Chyna moves… Lita runs in to Megumi Kudo and she gets knocked off the apron and Megumi Kudo has been eliminated…
Kitana Baker:Megumi Kudo has been eliminated…
Al Snow:We are down to two… Lita and Chyna…
Mark:Chyna nails Lita with a couple of forearm shots knocking Lita back in to the ropes… Chyna hooks up Lita and drives her to the canvas with a vertical suplex…
Al Snow:Chyna is showing off her power…
Mark:Lita is back up on her feet… Chyna hooks up Lita… Powerbomb…
Al Snow:I believe we are seeing the first ever Womens Champion show her dominance…
Mark:Chyna now grabs Lita by the hair and throws her over the top rope…
Al Snow:Lita has hung on… But Chyna doesn’t know it…
Mark:Chyna is asking for the belt…
Al Snow:Lita is back in to the ring…
Mark:Dropkick from behind nailing Chyna in the head knocking her in to the ropes… Lita charges in as Chyna turns around and knocks her over the top rope with a clothesline… NEW CHAMPION!
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner and NEW eWa Womens Champion… LITA…
Al Snow:Lita did it… She is now the first ever eWa Womens Champion…
Mark:Our next contest should be very interesting… A Punch Drunk Match for the FTW Championship…Lets send it down to the ring for the introductions…
FTW Championship Punch Drunk Match
Subway(c) Vs. Raven
Kitana Baker:This next contest is a PUNCH DRUNK MATCH and is for the FTW Championship… Introducing first… The Challenger…From the Bowerly… Weighing in at 237 Pounds… RAVEN…
(“Scream” plays as Raven enters the arena…)
Kitana Baker:His opponent… From Wildwood,Nj… Weighing in at 220 Pounds… A member of the Third World Empire… The FTW Champion… SUBWAY…
(“Hits from the bong” plays as Subway enters the arena…)
Mark:Well this one is going to be different…
Al Snow:This is not going to be a wrestling match… This is just going to be a slugfest to see who can take the most punishment and the most alcohol…
Mark:Well both men are instructed to take the first drink by the referee… Since Subway is the champion he gets to take the first shot…
Al Snow:Im putting my money on Raven in this one… EVENFLOW and SNOW CONNECTION RULES!
Mark:Subway reaches back delivers a big right hand to Raven…
Al Snow:Raven took the shot and is still standing and is smiling after the first shot…
Mark:Raven reaches back and delivers a shot right to Subway…
Al Snow:Just like Raven… Subway is smiling…
Mark:Both men take another drink and Subway nails Raven with a right hand… Raven comes back and he nails Subway with an over hand cross…
Al Snow:I believe this is going to be a test of who can take the most alcohol…
Mark:The referee gives both men another drink… And both men are starting to feel the effects of the alcohol…
Al Snow:Subway just nailed Raven and Raven is starting to stagger around now…
Mark:Raven regains his balance and nails Subway with a right hand…
Al Snow:Subway keeps his balance and now waits to take another drink…
Mark:This is the fourth drink for both men… Subway swings and connects with a right hand…
Al Snow:Some can Subway is at a disadvantage after all he was already in a match up earlier which turned out to be a handicap match…
Mark:Raven scores and connects with a right hand…
Al Snow:Bottoms up…
Mark:Subway and Raven takes down another drink…
Al Snow:Look at their eyes… You can see it is getting harder for them to keep their eyes open…
Mark:Subway reaches back and clocks Raven right in the jaw…
Al Snow:Raven comes right back and nails Subway with a right hand…
Mark:Subway and Raven take another drink…
Al Snow:They are drinking some strong alcohol… So I believe we are going to see a winner real soon…
Mark:The referee gives both men another drink… And both men are continuing to feel the effects of the alcohol…
Al Snow:Subway just nailed Raven and Raven is really staggering around now…
Mark:Raven regains his balance and nails Subway with a right hand…
Al Snow:Subway is staggering around as well…
Mark:The referee gives both men another drink… And both men are really feeling the effects of the alcohol…
Al Snow:Subway reachs back and connects with a right hand…Raven once again staggers around…
Mark:Raven once again regains his balance and nails Subway with a right hand…
Al Snow:Subway is having some trouble staying on his feet…
Mark:Ninth drink of strong alcohol… And Subway is really having some trouble as the beating from earlier on is catching up with him… Subways right hand connects but doesn’t have much of an effect…
Al Snow:Raven reaches back and knocks down Subway…
Mark:Subway tries to pull himself up…
Al Snow:The referee is counting him out and we could be seeing a new champion right here…
Mark:The referee says Subway is up and able to continue and both men take their tenth drink…
Al Snow:Subway is in bad shape…
Mark:Big right hand by Subway and down goes Raven…
Al Snow:Raven quickly gets to the ropes and pulls himself back up…
Mark:Raven connects and knocks down Subway…
Al Snow:Subway hit the mat hard…
Mark:The referee is once again counting down Subway…
Al Snow:The referee is up to eight…
Mark:Subway gets up and the referee tells them to take another drink and they do…
Al Snow:Subway is trying to gain his composure…
Mark:Subway swings and he knocks Raven back in to the ropes with the right hand… Raven comes back and nails Subway straight in the jaw with a right hand…
Al Snow:Subway just hit the mat and I don’t think he is getting up…
Mark:The referee is counting down Subway…
Al Snow:Subway is not really moving around…
Mark:The referee is up to nine… Subway is up and falls back down… The referee counts him out… We have a new champion…
Kitana Baker:Here is your winner and NEW FTW Champion RAVEN…
Al Snow:Raven was able to hold his alcohol and is now the FTW Champion…
Mark:The referee is checking on Subway…
Al Snow:Someone just ran down to the ring…
Mark:Doug Kinsella has hit the ring and spins Raven around… IMPACT DROP!
Al Snow:Looks like that was payback for earlier in the night…
Mark:The FTW Champion has been laid out by Doug Kinsella… But right now we have to head to the ring for the eWa X Championship Match…
EWA X Championship on the line
Whoever pins Shawn Michaels is the new X Champion
Shawn Michaels(c) & William McConnell Vs. The New Age Outlaws
Kitana Baker:This next contest is a Tag Team Match and is for the eWa X Championship… Introducing first… The Challengers… Weighing in at a combined weight of 504 Pounds… Road Dogg Jesse James… Badd Ass Billy Gunn… THE NEW AGE OUTLAWS…
(“Oh you didn’t know” plays as Billy Gunn and Road Dogg enter the arena…)
Kitana Baker:And their opponents… Representing Degeneration X… The Answer WILLIAM McCONNELL and the eWa X Champion… The Heartbreak Kid SHAWN MICHAELS…
(“Break it Down” plays as Shawn Michaels and William McConnell enter the arena…)
Mark:Here we go… McConnell and Gunn will start things out… McConnell with a straight right hand to Billy Gunn… Gunn comes back with a right hand of his own… McConnell goes in for a side headlock… Billy Gunn pushes McConnell right off in to the ropes… Billy Gunn goes for a clothesline… Ducked by McConnell who opens up with a couple of right hands…
Al Snow:A little back and forth action going on here in the beginning of this match up…
Mark:McConnell with a stiff kick to the midsection… Swinging neckbreaker by The Answer… Quick cover 1…………………..2………………….. Billy Gunn gets his shoulder up…
Al Snow:McConnell brings Billy Gunn over to the DX corner and Shawn Michaels tags himself in…
Mark:McConnell opens up Billy Gunn and Shawn Michaels with a stiff kick to the midsection… HBK follows up with a couple of right hands… Kick to the midsection by HBK… Who follows it up with an atomic drop…
Al Snow:HBK is starting to get in to a grove and get in to the flow of this match up…
Mark:Irish whip by Shawn Michaels… Billy Gunn comes off the ropes… Arm drag take down by The Showstopper… As Shawn begins to grind away at the arm of Billy Gunn…
Al Snow:Billy is trying to get back up to easy the pressure on his arm…
Mark:That is exactly what happen as Billy Gunn is back up… Trying to back Shawn Michaels up in to the ropes…Irish whip by Billy Gunn… Reversed by Shawn Michaels… Billy Gunn comes off the ropes and HBK connects with a dropkick…
Al Snow:Shawn is bringing Billy to the DX corner…
Mark:William McConnell gets the tag back in and hammers Billy Gunn with a couple of right hands followed by a scoop slam back down to the canvas…
Al Snow:This is the first time Shawn and Will have teamed up together and they are making a pretty good team…
Mark:Leg drop by McConnell as he goes for a cover 1………………………2…………. Kickout by Billy Gunn…
Al Snow:Road Dogg wants in this match up badly Mark…
Mark:Irish whip by McConnell… Gunn comes off the ropes…
Al Snow:Blind Tag… Blind Tag…
Mark:McConnell connects with a spin heel kick and goes for a cover but Road Dogg is in the ring and breaks it up…
Al Snow:Like I said there was a blind tag…
Mark:Road Dogg now kicks McConnell in the midsection and takes him over with a suplex…
Al Snow:Road Dogg is waiting on McConnell to get back up on his feet…
Mark:Right hand by Road Dogg… And another…
Al Snow:McConnell is dazed on his feet…
Mark:Big right hand by Road Dogg after doing a little dance… Road Dogg comes off the ropes and does a little bit of shake rattle and roll as he drops the knee on McConnell… Road Dogg goes for a cover 1……………………..2…………. HBK comes in to break it up…
Al Snow:By breaking up the pin Shawn gave his partner sometime to regroup…
Mark:Road Dogg now picks up William McConnell and connects with a side walk slam…Road Dogg goes for a cover 1……………………….2……………………….. McConnell kicks out…
Al Snow:The momentum has swung in favor of the New Age Outlaws…
Mark:Road Dogg hooks up McConnell… PUMP HANDLE SLA… NO! McConnell blocks and pushes Road Dogg in to the corner…Double Clothesline by both men…
Al Snow:Both men are down on the canvas and both need to make a tag…
Mark:Road Dogg tags out first…
Al Snow:Shawn gets the tag as well…
Mark:Billy Gunn blocks the right hands from Shawn Michaels and opens up on him with right hands of his own…
Al Snow:Billy is just opening up on the eWa X Champion…
Mark:Irish whip by Billy Gunn… Gunn goes for a clothesline… Ducked by Shawn Michaels… HBK comes off and connects with a flying forearm…
Al Snow:Both men are down…
Mark:HBK nips up…
Al Snow:Billy Gunn is back up…
Mark:Right hands by the Heartbreak Kid… Kick to the midsection and it is followed up by a scoop slam…
Al Snow:Shawn Michaels is heading to the top rope…
Mark:Billy Gunn is back up and Michaels connects with a double axe handle…
Al Snow:Shawn is now tuning up the band for some Sweet Chin Music…
Mark:HBK lines up Billy Gunn…
Al Snow:Road Dogg is in the ring…
Mark:McConnell comes in… FIVE STAR SUPERKICK!
Al Snow:McConnell just knocked out Road Dogg…
Mark:Billy Gunn is back up… SWEET CHIN MUSIC! By The Heartbreak Kid… Cover 1………………………2……………………….3……. ITS OVER!
Kitana Baker:Here is your winners WILLIAM McCONNELL and STILL eWa X Champion SHAWN MICHAELS…
Al Snow:Team DX was too much for the New Age Outlaws…
Mark:Its time to see if Triple H can have as much success as McConnell and Michaels…As we send it dow…
(“Thou Shall” plays over the p/a system as the lights go out…thunder is heard throughout the arena over the p/a system…the cross with Paynekiller still hooked with the tv championship begins to lower down as DX looks up at the cross)
Mark:Uh oh..Paynekiller is dead but his spirit is quite alive..whats going on?
Al Snow:Here it comes..DX looks ready for anything..shawn and william are just looking at each other in shock..Shawn had a mic as he was ready to say something
Mark:Look the cross set outside the ring as it comes down…what now..maybe someone just dropped it
Al Snow:Mark..he’s moving!?
Mark:PAYNEKILLER IS MOVING..the lights are out, I can barely see anything, but its enough to know that he is moving
Al Snow:Paynekiller is moving slowly as he untangles his hands from that rope..he looks so weak Mark..no blood..try blood all over his body..and his torn clothe
Mark:OH MY GOD..HE HAS JUT ROSE AND UNTANGLE HIS FOOT..HE IS ON HIS FEET
Al Snow:He was dead mark..he was dead!
Mark:He is making his way to the ring..walking slowly..it seems like he can barely walk
Al Snow:Look at his eyes mark..he seems angry..he is now in the ring..looking straight at Shawn and William..
Mark:He just grabbed that mic from Shawn very slowly..Shawn didn’t do anything to stop him…
Paynekiller:On…the….third…..day…….he rose….you judged him…you tried to kill him….you made a wrong mistake…now…his resurrection is now…NOW…
Mark:PAYNE RELIEVER TO SHAWN MICHEALS…here comes William as Paynekiller turns around sharply…
Al Snow:His eyes seem red mark..this is not the Payne Killer that was crucified
Mark:William is backing down..NO…he just jumped on Payne Killer and knocked him down out of the ring..he is so fragile…
Al Snow:He is up..look at the face of Paynekiller..he is laughing Mark…he is walking back now..He just fell on the cross.same way that he was crucified…
(The lights go out in the arena and come back on one minute later )
Mark:Where is he?..Where did he go?…LOOK up there..he is back on the cross. crucified…
Al Snow:Was that even Payne Killer?..Shawn is up and they look angry.. they make their way to back looking at the Payne Killer high in the arena…
Barbwire Exploding Musical Chairs Lumberjack Bed of Nails Death 3 Falls Match
Lumberjacks can be selected by wrestlers if desired
Vertigo Vs. Triple H
Kitana Baker:This next contest is a BARBED WIRE EXPLODING LUMBERJACK BED OF NAILS DEATH MATCH…Introducing first… From Greenwich, Ct… Weighing in at 260 Pounds… Representing Degeneration Xl… The Game TRIPLE H…
(“The Game” plays as Triple H walks in to the arena…)
Kitana Baker:His opponent… From Atlanta, Ga… Weighing in at 175 pounds… The eWa Champion… VERTIGO…
(“Sober” plays throughout the arena…)
Al Snow:Where is Vertigo? This has been a strange night… This is even stranger that Vertigo is no where to be seen…
Mark:I agree with you there…Triple H has just picked up the mic…
HHH:Come on Rob… Time is a wasting… The time is now for you to play the game… So get your ass out here… RIGHT NOW!
Al Snow:The Game is waiting for Vertigo… But I dont think he is com…
(Lights go out)
Al Snow:What the hell has happen to the lights?
Mark:I have no idea…
(A spotlight points up to the rafthers of the arena showing a shadow of a man)
Al Snow:Who is that?
Mark:The man is coming down from the rafthers and is heading down to the ring…
Al Snow:Triple H is still in the ring waiting for Vertigo…
(lights come back on)
Mark:ITS STING!
Al Snow:WHAT?!?
Mark:Sting is in the ring and is face to face with Triple H…
Al Snow:Sting has his black bat in hand…
Mark:Triple H is giving Sting some lip service…Sting just pushed Triple H in the chest with the bat…
Al Snow:I can not believe what I am seeing…
Mark:Sting has arrived here in the eWa…And his target seems to be Triple H…
Al Snow:I guess Sting has been the man we have been seeing in the rafthers in the past few weeks…
Mark:Triple H gets back up in the face of Sting again… And this time walks away…
Al Snow:Triple H is not giving Sting another chance to attack him…
Mark:Sting has stepped up to the plate to fight for the eWa against Triple H and the rest of Degeneration X…
Al Snow:What will Sting do next?
Mark:What will Triple H have to say about Sting coming down and getting up in to his face… We will find out soon enough… Al… Good luck with your Guiding Light Match…As we are now set for our featured main event…
EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Title Guiding Light Match
Al Snow(c) Vs. Eric Stryker
Written by Dprincedso
MARK: We’ve got everything else down and now it’s time to celebrate the New Year EWA main event style! Al Snow left the broadcast position long ago and now, I’m joined by my regular partner in crime in Rhino. R-Man, we gotta pretty much watch TV again.
RHINO: That’s because the Guiding Light Match itself leaves no room for the audience. Then again, that looks like the Guiding Light setup above the ring. The barricade has been extended tonight and it looks like it’s a huge Plexiglas or plastic-type thing. It’s kind of hard to explain.
MARK: From what I see, it’s a structure much wider than the Elimination Chamber. Did Purgatory make the Guiding Light a self-contained match?
RHINO: That’s what it looks like to me. They’re making the proper adjustments in the ring now and from what it looks like, the Guiding Light Match itself will fit right down onto the ring!
MARK: Leave it to our resident gimmick builder to make the Guiding Light a match we won’t have to cut to on Hardcore Theater.
RHINO: Kitana Baker looks ready to announce the….
(“99 Problems” by Jay-Z kicks up inside Madison Square Garden)
MARK: Uh-oh.
RHINO: That’s what I was about to say.
MARK: EWA President Omega making his way down the ring and he’s not wasting any time. Looks like he has documents or something.
RHINO: Omega’s been pretty ominous with this whole “new era” thing. Could it start tonight?
MARK: Well, he just stepped over the ropes and handed Kitana that manila folder. He’s just leaving now.
RHINO: No trouble from Omega? Now, I’m really scared. Folks watching tonight, there’s nothing like watching the EWA live. Omega made Kitana look like a 4-year old girl standing that close to her.
MARK: The largest president in all of history up to something here. I’m already uneasy about this night.
RHINO: But this night isn’t done until Kitana starts, is it?
KITANA BAKER: Ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the main event of the evening! The following contest is THE GUIDING LIGHT MATCH! The goal of this match is to touch all the lights that a wrestler is assigned. Your referee for this match will be SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE….PURGATORY!
(“Inner Universe” by Origa kicks up inside MSG)
MARK: I don’t expect this! Purgatory from the monthly crew making his way to the ring as a special referee. It’s the super-size Power Wheel! I want one!
RHINO: And I want Super Saiyan hair. Purgatory coming down in….why is he dressed like the Statue Of Liberty? ready to call it down the middle. No pushing around the referee in this match. Purgatory’s one of the few guys here to actually get a pure EWA chant but every now and then an XHWF or XHCWF break out. Purg looks like a shrunken Hulk after getting some scars from The Abomination.
KITANA BAKER: Now, introducing first, the challenger, from New York City and weighing 237 pounds….ERIC STRYKER!
(“Accidents” by Alexisonfire kicks up inside MSG)
MARK: Eric Stryker getting a HUGE ovation from this New York crowd here!
RHINO: This is his home and his backyard. Stryker making the biggest mark he can make in his now-budding singles career by trying to defeat the current champion; Al Snow.
MARK: Stryker is fresh off his split with former Next Level tag team partner, Aaron Marx. With new management in John Stevens, he’s heavily favored by the betters here in New York.
RHINO: Stryker inside that Guiding Light ring and by himself. Where’s Stevens? I thought….HELLO? Can anyone here me? Those chants of “NYC” are too hard to talk over!
KITANA BAKER: And now introducing from Lima, Ohio and weighing 234 pounds, he is the current EWA UNDISPUTED WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION….AL SNOW!
(“What does everybody want?” by WWE Productions kicks up inside MSG)
MARK: HEAD!
RHINO: I want Head too but not from you. Al Snow coming down to the ring with the EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Championship around his waist. As an announcer, I’m pulling for him all the way.
MARK: Snow doesn’t have Head with him as he makes his way to the ring. Nobody ever thought he would last this long as champion but he has.
RHINO: Snow coming to the ring looking as focused as I’ve ever seen him.
MARK: He’s focused and ready as he hands the EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Championship to Purgatory. It may be the last time he sees it.
RHINO: Go announce team workers!
MARK: The bell rings and here we go. Snow and Stryker pouncing the ring, trying to size each other up. Collar and elbow tie-up. No one with the advantage as both of these men similar in height and weight but Stryker who’s three inches taller and three pounds heavier getting a bit of the advantage. Snow with a leg trip. Floats over and locks the head. Both men on the ground. Stryker up on his knees. Squeezes out and slaps on a reverse chin lock. Snow and Stryker both at a standing position now. Snow looking for a way out and finds one in a reverse armbar. Stryker looking for a way out.
RHINO: How long do you think this’ll last as….OOOOHHHH! There goes the wrestling!
MARK: Stryker with a low blow and if this way anywhere but the EWA, he would be disqualified! Stryker with a DDT and now quickly locks in an STF! Stryker trying to wear down Snow and get an early lead to try and touch all his assigned lights.
RHINO: Do you know what lights he was assigned?
MARK: Whatever it is, he has to touch 12 lights red or green. 24 in total lights and Al Snow fighting his way out and this is part of Stryker’s plan.
RHINO: Yeah, he’s trying to tire Al fast to get the lights easier. Al actually powering his way out of the STF here and now, he’s got in a variation of a Death Lock. Al pretty much sticking to wrestling despite that low blow by Stryker earlier.
MARK: Stryker turning and gets a shot in on Snow. Another. And another. Stryker really surprising me so far beating Snow to the punch here but is that a part of Snow’s plan to lull Stryker into a false sense of confidence?
RHINO: I think it’s because Al Snow legitimately likes the pain.
MARK: Stryker with a hard left and Snow backs off. Stryker quickly back up. Clothesline no. Quick trip up by Snow. Both men back up. Snow with a quick trip up again. Back up faster than they went down. Deep arm drag by Snow. Stryker charges and gets another deep arm drag. Stryker again and uh….how do I describe that?
RHINO: Stryker got pushed outside by Al Snow’s boot to his ass. Stryker goes from in control to out of whack in a heartbeat and he’s trying to figure out what the hell is going on here. What the hell? Where’s Al Snow going so fast?
MARK: Al Snow got as fast out of the ring as I’ve seen anyone and he makes a mad dash to the hallway. Stryker comes all the way around to try to catch Snow who looks like he’s going for his lights. Snow touching the red lights. One would assume that he actually was assigned the red lights and he’s touching them quick. Stryker giving chase and at the same time touching the green lights. He’s got to stop and put some speed on here or he’s going to lose this match. Stryker burst with speed and Snow shifts gears and stops him in his tracks with a kick to the gut. Head first into a red light! Now that’s a nice way to touch your assigned light! Al looks to be petting the light after that blow. What’s he saying?
RHINO: He’s telling Stryker to stop him as he rams his head into the red light over and over again. Snow in control. Can we get some sort of light count here? Snow with a handful of Eric Stryker pretty much walking him toward the hallway
MARK: Smart move by Al Snow because Stryker is already busted open. That’s gonna slow him down a bit. Snow and Stryker making their way back up the hallway and toward the ring. Stryker with a punch to the ribs to Snow. Another. Snow hooks Stryker and drives him inside that hallway with a Fisherman’s Suplex.
RHINO: Hey! Stryker’s coughing from that! It’s the dreaded HALLS COUGH DROP!
MARK: Yeah. Halls Cough Drop. More proof that Al’s been hanging around the referee too long. Al picking his spots and now, he’s dragging Stryker some more. I don’t know why Snow is bent on….oh. Here we go. This is more like it! We are now in the Table Section of the Guiding Light! That’s what Snow was trying to do! He was trying to get Stryker into a section!
RHINO: There’s a lot of tables to choose from. So many choices, so little time.
MARK: Snow looking to do something as Stryker is still down from the “Halls Cough Drop.” Snow starting to set some tables up. Opens one and puts it down with the legs standing up. Snow moving as fast as he can to set up whatever he’s doing. Puts another one to fit on the side. Stryker coming out of it and he’s now looking for something. Snow with a third table now. Notices Stryker moving around. Snow hurrying it up and sets that final table on top of the table with the legs up. This must be that casket table thing he was talking about. Snow going over to Stryker. What was that? Stryker takes down Snow with a Spear!
RHINO: I think Stryker threw one of those Crayola Child Art Tables at Snow and it was just enough to distract him for Stryker to get some offense back. Snow down and feelin’ the ribs.
MARK: Stryker back up and now, he’s looking for….I think he’s found it. Barb Wire Exploding Table.
RHINO: Almost as trusty as a chair.
MARK: Stryker laying the table down. Both men are pretty much surrounded by tables both set up and closed so there’s no telling what could happen here. Stryker grabs a handful of Al’s hair. Picks him up. Hip toss right into the Barb Wire Exploding Table!
RHINO: I agree with the crowd. Holy Shit.
MARK: Stryker not done as Snow is writhing in pain! Stryker picking Snow up by the legs! Hey! A Giant Swing! I would’ve never thought Eric would be the type to use that move! He just let Snow go and I don’t know what happened to him. All I know is I heard a large crash and what sounded like shattering glass. Snow probably either hit or crashed into or made another table come down on a Glass Table. Stryker now staggering out of the table section of the Guiding Light Match. A combination of being dizzy from blood loss and the Giant Swing. I don’t think this is a good idea.
RHINO: Yeah. Stryker’s lost a lot of blood with that head cut and the intensity of the match combined with all that spinning with the Giant Swing didn’t do him any favors. I don’t even think he’s aware of what section he’s in. CHAIRS!
MARK: He may be more aware than we know. Stryker stumbling around trying to get some chairs. Goes past the recliner and beanbag.
RHINO: Wooden stools, classic metal and yes, even glass chairs all for free!
MARK: Eric grabbing as much as he can and he’s got one more; a Barb Wire Exploding Chair. Just like the ones we saw earlier.
RHINO: Maybe this time, it’ll actually be used.
MARK: So far, Purgatory has stayed completely out of this match and no one has tried anything with him.
RHINO: They’ve been too busy kicking each other’s asses.
MARK: Stryker back in the Table Section. Where’s Snow? Stryker putting down the chairs. I don’t see Snow anywhere. Stryker sees what I see. A trail of blood going out the table section.
RHINO: Where?
MARK: See it? It’s not hard to miss because of the bloody hand prints against the wall going out.
RHINO: I see it now.
MARK: Stryker following the trail. He wants to make sure Snow is completely out.
RHINO: No he doesn’t! He’s picking his chairs up and he’s going down the hallway! He’s saying to hell with this, the ladder and mystery box sections! He’s gonna end this match!
MARK: We’re getting a visual now of the lights touch. One more each? Are you kiddin’ me? Both guys only had one light left to touch! Unbelievable!
RHINO: Al’s right there, Stryker! Stryker doesn’t see him! I can see him!
MARK: Maybe certain parts of that plastic casing or Plexiglas or whatever it is may be tinted. Stryker nailed by Snow right in the hallway!
RHINO: What he hit him with? What is that? Oh shit! It’s a drill!
MARK: Snow nailing Stryker with that drill but he hit him with the end part and now Snow taking a moment to rest here and look at Snow. He’s turned it up here. He’s cut up badly and he’s probably not even feeling it.
RHINO: That explains why he hasn’t pulled that chunk of glass out of his arm yet.
MARK: It’s not that big but our cameras did pick up a noticeable piece of glass in Snow’s left arm. Snow picking up the glass chair Stryker dropped. Stryker trips Snow. MY GOD! STRYKER’S USING THE DRILL ON AL SNOW! SNOW ABSOLUTELY SCREAMING IN PAIN!
RHINO: Stryker drilling the left upper shoulder of Snow and look at that freakin’ crazy look in his eyes! So much for that!
MARK: Snow with a low blow to Stryker from a laying position as Snow yanks the still-operating drill from his left shoulder area. Snow in deep pain.
RHINO: Snow’s kinda twisted himself. Did you see the way he basically looked at his own meat on that drill as if to say “I’ll eat it later?” I didn’t know these two guys were that twisted.
MARK: Snow lays into Stryker with that glass chair and it shatters everywhere! Stryker collapses in a lump and now, he’s starting to bleed in multiple areas.
RHINO: You can see the carnage on Hardcore Theater in the sections. The ladder section was unused and the chair looks unused except for some blood and turned-over chairs Stryker left there. The table section definitely got some use and the mystery box sections got some boxes missing and a lot broken.
MARK: Snow walking over to some of those mystery boxes. They’re open so he knows what’s in them. We don’t. Rope. Motorcycle helmet. Gasoline. GASOLINE? A LIGHTER!
RHINO: Who cares about all that? IT’S HEAD! AL SNOW FOUND HEAD! I WANT HEAD!
MARK: Apparently, so does the rest of the crowd as chants of “We Want Head” fill MSG. The crowd has been pretty much watching in awe this whole time with frequent chants of “NYC,” “Stryker,” “We Want Snow,” “Who Are You? I’m Alcoholic,” and now, they want Head. Snow tying the rope to Head. He’s putting gasoline on Head! He’s lighting Head!
RHINO: FLAMING HEAD OF DOOM!
MARK: Snow nails Stryker with Head and Stryker screaming in pain because he’s been burned!
RHINO: Snow didn’t hit him anywhere on his open body parts though!
MARK: That flame’s got to be hot as Al hit him of all places in his….his….
RHINO: His ass.
MARK: Snow using a fire extinguisher to put Head out. Where’d that come from?
RHINO: Stryker in pain and trying to fight off that pain as he gets up and lands a right on Snow. Oooohhh man! Snow with a kick to the shin and a European Uppercut to put Stryker back down! Snow with a steel chair shot to the back of Stryker and now what?
MARK: Snow going back to his gasoline. Is he going to light Eric Stryker on fire here? Snow pouring that gas over the helmet. He’s now strapping it on. I have no idea what Snow is going to do but it looks like he’s gonna light himself, that’s right, LIGHT HIMSELF ON FIRE! Snow going to Stryker and there goes the fire! Snow’s head covered in flames as he underhooks both arms of Stryker!
RHINO: FLAMING TRAPPING HEADBUTTS OF DOOM!
MARK: Snow hitting his trademark trapping headbutts and Stryker screaming at the burns he’s getting! Stryker trying to find a way out of this! Knee to Snow’s side! Another! And another! Snow lets go! Snow holding his right side. Nasty chair shot by Stryker!
RHINO: He swiped at him so hard the helmet went flying off! Stryker with a quick grab. Reverse Russian Leg Sweep and Snow eats a face full of Exploding Barb Wire Chair! How many “holy shit” moments are we going to get tonight?
MARK: I don’t know but Stryker rolling away from Snow as soon as he hit that move as both men have basically thrown their styles completely out of the window to just try to survive long enough to win the match. Stryker looking for his light and sees it. Stryker crawling toward his light. Snow down, but not out. Both men, having a difficult time of seeing straight. Stryker seeing pretty much his own blood and Snow, half-blinded by that face full of Exploding Barb Wire Chair. Snow looking for his light as well. Purgatory looking at them because ironically, their lights are right next to each other. Not only did Stryker and Snow almost win this match in record time, they touched all but their assigned lights which happen to be next to each other.
RHINO: Maybe they lost track?
MARK: Maybe. Stryker now, inches away from becoming the new EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion.
RHINO: Look at Snow! He’s right next to his light but he can’t see it! All he has to do is freakin’ put his left arm down to rest and he remains EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion!
MARK: Stryker sees him and gets a burst of energy! He touches his light! New Champion!
RHINO: No! Look!
MARK: Snow has his hand on his light! Is he still EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion?
RHINO: What happened?
MARK: Purgatory says they touched at the same time! He’s calling for a replay on Hardcore Theater.
RHINO: Yeah. That way, we can all see.
MARK: Okay. Here’s the replay in pause-by-the-second play. There’s Stryker on the left side of the screen and Snow on the right. Wait. Purgatory calling for the light replay. What’s that? It looks like we’re seeing up from outside the lights. This is the best thing to go on and a very smart move by Purgatory having built cameras in the lights. Okay. There’s the green and red lights. They touched at the same time! You can see it by the cameras in the lights! Both men touched their final lights at exactly the same time! Look at the clock timer showing when they touched! It shows that they touched at the same time! Unbelievable!
RHINO: Not again!
MARK: Yes, THAT’S going to happen again.
KITANA BAKER: After review, it has been declared that both men touched their assigned lights at the same time so therefore, this match has been ruled a DRAW!
RHINO: Purgatory giving the gesture of the draw pointing at Stryker’s and Snow’s arms and raising his own declaring the match a draw. And so, we come to a point in time that we got another guy who’ll say “I really never lost the belt.”
MARK: Stryker visually upset coming so close to becoming the new EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion.
RHINO: Look at Snow. He’s just shrugging his shoulders. It’s like he knew this would happen or something like this. He knows what a draw means. It means he loses the title anyway due to indecision. That “win or else” policy by Omega has cost Raven and now, it’s cost Snow.
(“99 Problems” by Jay-Z kicks up inside MSG again)
MARK: Speaking of the President, here comes Omega now with the EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Championship with him.
RHINO: He’s not coming down all the way. I guess he’s gonna say his peace from the entrance.
OMEGA: Once again, my plans come full circle. When I stripped Triple H of what was called the EWA World Heavyweight Championship, I had a plan. I didn’t care how he felt about it. Fuck him and anyone else who questions my genius. This plan was to cause chaos in the world title picture and have I caused it or have I caused it? You know what the problem with chaos is? It gets old. It gets to be an everyday thing and an asshole like myself can’t have that. Al Snow, you know what happens when you have a match where it’s a draw. Indecision means you lose, bitch. Don’t sweat it, though. You’re gonna have your chance. The chaos I’ve cause has brought about five guys. Three never really lost the belt and two have legitimate claim to the belt. Part of this is gonna be steppin’ on Will McConnell’s shoes but I step where I fuckin’ feel like it. He’ll have his chance to do somethin’ about it if he don’t like what I’m about to say. Subway and Eric Stryker got legit claim to the title. Al Snow, Triple H and Raven really never lost it. How do you settle a controversy of who the EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion is? You put fuckers in a match and let ’em settle it. That’s how you do it. The EWA is gonna kick off the new year and I’m gonna settle this world title shit because not only am I stickin’ you five in a match, not only am I stickin’ you five in an Extreme Elimination Chamber, but I’m gonna put the stripes on and be the referee. It’s gonna be Al Snow, Raven, Eric Stryker, Triple H and Subway inside the Extreme Elimination Chamber. Who’s the last guy gonna be? That’s what I’m askin’ the rest of the EWA right now. Who wants to shut these five fuckers up? Who wants to say to hell with the claim and become the new EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion? Who wants that sixth spot? I’m asking and I’m gonna arrange it so that the guy who wants that sixth spot bad enough gets it. It don’t matter to me what happens. We’re gonna settle this EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Championship shit and we’re gonna settle it ONCE AND FOR ALL!
MARK: What? So the EWA is kicking off the new year with an Extreme Elimination Chamber featuring Al Snow, Subway, Triple H, Eric Stryker, Raven and an unknown sixth competitor in the pay-per-view Once And For All? That only comes around when things need to be settled and I guess this needs to be settled. I’m at a loss for words.
RHINO: Talk about a shot out of the dark. Looks like the EWA’s not gonna waste time with their shocking moments.
MARK: Well, that’s it for us. Mark and Rhino here saying we’ll see you next time when we settle the controversy of who is the EWA Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion ONCE AND FOR ALL!
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