May-Hem 2009

Mark:We are live in Boston, Mass for May-Hem 2009 and Rhino what a Double Main Event we have for everyone tonight…

Rhino:Oh this is one hell of a Double Main Event…

Mark:First it will be Triple H defending the EWA World Heavyweight Championship against Rob Van Dam and Subway in a Triple Threat Ladder Match…

Rhino:Triple H wants his belt back… While two men are looking to keep it from him… Only one of them will leave here tonight as champion…

Mark:Then you have the big one… Thirty Men… One winner… The EWA 2009 Royal Rumble…

Rhino:Alan Matthews, Hulk Hogan, Lone Jobber, Jeremy Johnson, The Rock, Al Snow, Troy Joseph and More will all be in this match up…

Mark:I cant wait for that one…

Rhino:Neither can I… As the winner will get a Guaranteed Shot at the EWA World Heavyweight Championship…

Mark:Also tonight the EWA Womens Championship will be on the line when Mya Parks defends against Stephanie McMahon and the final match in the best of three series will take place when Big Daddy Ace battles Doug Kinsella in a Last Man Standing Match…

Rhino:This is going to be one hell of a night…

Mark:It is shaping up to be a good one and lets head to the ring for our opening contest…

Felony vs Lilith Evans

Pa Announcer:Tonights Opening contest is set for one fall… Introducing first… From Baltimore,Maryland..Weighing in at 135 Pounds… LILITH EVANS!

(“Thoughtless” plays as Lilith Evans enter the arena…)

Pa Announcer:Her opponent… From Memphis, Tn…Weighing in at 127 Pounds… FELONY!

(“We Are Rockstars” plays as Felony enters the arena…)

Mark:Felony charges at Lilith Evans… Lilith Evans side steps Felony and shoves her off in to the ropes… Felony comes off the ropes… Back Body Drop!

Rhino:Felony is staggering right back up…

Mark:Felony is back up and Lilith Evans charges in… Running Clothesline!

Rhino:Lilith Evans is coming out firing…

Mark:Lilith Evans now hooks up Felony… Driven! No!

Rhino:Felony is firing back with shots to the midsection…

Mark:Felony goes for a big right hand… Lilith Evans ducks…

Rhino:Lilith Evans is firing back…

Mark:Felony gets spun around… DRIVEN!

Rhino:Felony has been laid out by Lilith Evans in the center of the ring…

Mark:Lilith Evans is now hooking up Felony…

Rhino:This is going to be it right now…

Mark:Lilith Evans has her setup… TORTURED!

Rhino:Felony isnt moving…

Mark:Lilith Evans covers Felony 1…………………2………3….ITS OVER!

Pa Announcer:Here is your winner LILITH EVANS!

Rhino:Lilith Evans gets back in to in ring competition and gets the victory…

Mark:Still to come tonight we will see if Rob Van Dam or Subway can take the EWA World Championship away from Triple H… But its now back to the ring for more action…

J-Twisted vs Tyke Lucifer

Pa Announcer:This next contest is set for one fall… Introducing first… From Brick City, Nj… Weighing in at 258 Pounds… J-TWISTED!

(“La La La” plays as J-Twisted enters the arena…)

Pa Announcer:His opponent… From Miami, Florida… Weighing in at 220 Pounds… TYKE LUCIFER!

(“Crank Dat” plays as Tyke Lucifer enters the arena…)

Mark:Before the bell even starts J-Twisted charges right at at Tyke Lucifer knocking him right off the ring apron…

Rhino:J-Twisted knocked him right off the apron and he hit the guard rail hard…

Mark:J-Twisted is now grabbing Tyke Lucifer and rams his head right in to the side of the ring…

Rhino:Tyke Lucifer looks dazed…

Mark:One more time J-Twisted rams Tyke Lucifer’s head right in to the side of the ring…

Rhino:J-Twisted just rolled Tyke Lucifer back in to the ring…

Mark:J-Twisted is now heading up on to the top rope…

Rhion:Tyke Lucifer is staggering back up on to his feet…

Mark:Flying Clothesline! From the top rope taking Tyke Lucifer right off of his feet…

Rhino:J-Twisted is coming out as a house of fire…

Mark:J-Twisted is now picking Tyke Lucifer back up on to his feet…

Rhino:This could be the end right now…

Mark:J-Twisted hooks up Tyke Lucifer… ONE HITTA QUITTA!

Rhino:Tyke Lucifer has been knocked out…

Mark:J-Twisted covers Tyke Lucifer 1……………2…………3…….. ITS OVER!

Pa Announcer:Here is your winner J-TWISTED!

Rhino:J-Twisted with a strong performance here tonight against Tyke Lucifer…

Mark:Still to come tonight we will have the 30 Man Over The Top Rope Royal Rumble… Who will win? We will find out in our Main Event… As we get set for our first championship match up of the evening…

EWA Womens Championship Steel Cage Blindfold Match
Mya Parks(c) vs Stephanie McMahon

Pa Announcer:This next contest is the Steel Cage Blindfold Match and is for the EWA Womens Championship… Introducing first..From Greenwich, Ct… Weighing in at 135 Pounds… STEPHANIE McMAHON!

(“All Grown Up” plays as Stephanie McMahon enters the arena…)

Pa Announcer:Her Opponent…From Washington, D.C… Weighing in at 125 Pounds…The EWA Womens Champion…MYA PARKS!

(“Spellbound” plays as Mya Parks enters the arena…)

Mark:Both women are being blindfolded right now…

Rhino:This one is very interesting to say to the least…

Mark:The Referee has called for the bell and here we go… As both women are trying to feel it out…

Rhino:They are walking towards each other…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is walking around and she believes she is walking towards Mya Parks…

Rhino:Shes walking towards the cage…

Mark:Mya Parks taking small steps and is trying to guide herself around…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon just felt around and she just grabbed the rope…

Mark:Mya Parks is trying to listen to the crowd… Mya Parks starts to charge..

Rhino:She is running towards Stephanie McMahon…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon walked a few steps and Mya Parks goes running in to the ropes…

Rhino:Mya Parks is running the ropes right now…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is now turning around and is trying to figure out where she is at…

Rhino:Mya Parks is now in the middle of the ring and she is trying to gather herself…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is feeling the ropes and is trying to reach for the cage…

Rhino:It looks like Stephanie McMahon has found the cage and is trying to climb up it…

Mark:Mya Parks is listening to the fans and is trying to make her way towards Stephanie McMahon…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon is slowly climbing up the cage wall…

Mark:Mya Parks is getting closer to her and is feeling her way…

Rhino:Mya Parks is trying to reach for the cage…

Mark:Mya Parks has hold of the cage and now shakes it and Stephanie McMahon falls off the cage and down to the mat…

Rhino:Stephanie’s head bounced right off the mat…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is trying to get back up on to her feet… Mya Parks is trying to turn around…

Rhino:The fans are directing her…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is back up… Mya Parks charges and scores with a clothesline!

Rhino:Nice move right there as she was able to hit the clothesline…

Mark:Mya Parks is trying now to pull Stephanie McMahon back up on to her feet…

Rhino:I think Mya Parks is looking to connect with a suplex…

Mark:Mya Parks hooks her up… Suplex! No! Stephanie McMahon escapes and feels around and now shoves Mya Parks right in to the steel cage…

Rhino:Mya Parks went head first in to the cage…

Mark:Mya Parks is dazed as she turns around… Stephanie McMahon goes for a clothesline and completely misses the clothesline…

Rhino:Mya Parks still doesn’t know where she is right now…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is feeling around and now grabs a hold of Mya Parks…As Stephanie McMahon kicks her now in the midsection… DDT!

Rhino:The EWA Womens Champion is down…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is trying to feel her way towards the cage now that she had the EWA Womens Champion down on to the mat…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon looks like she has found the cage wall…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is now beginning her climb out of the cage…

Rhino:Mya Parks is starting to move and to get back up on to her feet…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon now is getting up the wall…

Rhino:Mya Parks is now back up…

Mark:Mya Parks is trying to get to the side of the cage that Stephanie McMahon is at…

Rhino:The fans are directing her once again…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is getting close to the top of the cage…

Rhino:Mya Parks has found her…

Mark:Mya Parks is jumping up and trying to trip up or grabs the leg of Stephanie McMahon… After the third jump she is able to grab a hold of her leg and now pulls her down off the cage…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon is now straddling the top rope…

Mark:Mya Parks is now grabbing a hold of the top rope and is moving it up and down…

Rhino:That’s not where Stephanie McMahon wants to be…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon falls off the top rope… Now the EWA Womens Champion is trying to feel for the cage wall…

Rhino:Mya Parks is planning on leaving here tonight still the EWA Womens Champion…

Mark:Mya Parks has a hold of the wall and is beginning her slow climb up the cage wall…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon is rolling around the ring right now…

Mark:Mya Parks is getting up the wall…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon is back up on to her feet now…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is trying to find out where Mya Parks is at…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon is feeling around…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon reaches up and pulls Mya Parks down…

Rhino:Mya Parks landed on her feet…

Mark:Both women are looking at each other… But they really dont know that they are since they cant see each other…

Rhino:They are both now walking opposite directions…

Mark:Mya Parks and Stephanie McMahon are heading in opposite directions right now heading for different sides of the cage…

Rhino:Mya Parks has grabbed on to a wall…

Mark:So has Stephanie McMahon…

Rhino:It looks like its going to be a race to see which woman can get out of the cage first…

Mark:Both women are making their way up the cage wall slowly…

Rhino:Mya Parks is a little bit ahead of Stephanie McMahon at the moment…

Mark:Who is going to be the EWA Womens Champion when this is all set and done is the big question right now…

Rhino:Mya Parks is higher up the wall still…

Mark:Stephanie McMahon is starting to close a little bit of ground at the moment…

Rhino:Both women are trying to feel around for the top of the cage…

Mark:Mya Parks is trying to pull herself up and over the top of the cage wall…

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon has just pulled herself up…

Mark:Both women are now straddling the top of the cage…

Rhino:Who will be the first one down?

Mark:Mya Parks is climbing down right now…

Rhino:So is Stephanie McMahon…

Mark:This is getting close…

Rhino:They are both getting real close to the bottom of the cage…

Mark:Both women are almost there… Mya jumps… Stephanie Jumps… Feet Land! ITS OVER!

Rhino:Who landed first?

Mark:Im not sure…As it looked like to me that both women hit the floor at the same time… But im not sure…

Rhino:Its really close..

Mark:The referee is talking it over with the PA Announcer and here comes the decision…

Pa Announcer:The referee has ruled that the feet of Stephanie McMahon landed first… There for… Your Winner and NEW EWA Womens Champion STEPHANIE McMAHON!

Rhino:Stephanie McMahon is now the EWA Womens Champion…

Mark:What a finish to this most unusual match up… Stephanie McMahon is now your EWA Womens Champion… Can Triple H retain his title later tonight we will find out… But now we get set for the Last Man Standing Match…

Best of Three Series
Match 3-Last Man Standing
Big Daddy Ace vs Doug Kinsella

Pa Announcer:This Next Contest is the Last Man Standing Match in the Best of Three Series… Introducing first…From Boston, Mass…Weighing in at 273 Pounds… BIG DADDY ACE!

(“Enemy” plays as Big Daddy Ace enters the arena…)

Pa Announcer:His opponent…From Dayton, Ohio…Weighing in at 235 Pounds… DOUG KINSELLA!

(“Blackbird” plays as Doug Kinsella enters the arena…)

Mark:Doug Kinsella and Big Daddy Ace are now going after one another trading right hands back and forth…

Rhino:They are just slugging it out to begin this match up…

Mark:There is so much at stake… As the winner gets a shot at the EWA World Heavyweight Championship at High Stakes… Against the winner of the Triple Threat Match later on tonight…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is just hammering Doug Kinsella with shots right now…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace whips Doug Kinsella off in to the ropes… Back Body Drop!

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is staggering back up on to his feet…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace charges and clotheslines him over the top rope and to the outside of the ring goes Doug Kinsella…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is trying to regroup on the outside of the ring…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace goes right out after him and now grabs him by the head and rams him head first in to the Steel Steps…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is dazed…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace now whips Doug Kinsella right in to the Steel Guard Rail…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is coming out on the attack…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace charges in at Doug Kinsella… Doug Kinsella ducks and back drops Big Daddy Ace over the guardrail right in to the crowd…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now climbing over the guardrail to go after Big Daddy Ace…

Mark:They are fighting through the crowd right now… As Doug Kinsella is dragging Big Daddy Ace by the head over to the wall and now throws him right in to the concrete wall…

Rhino:That had to hurt…

Mark:Doug Kinsella now grabs Big Daddy Ace and slams him down to the ground…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now walking up the steps…

Mark:What does Doug Kinsella have in mind right now…

Rhino:I have no idea but Doug Kinsella just climbed over the railing and is about 10 feet above Big Daddy Ace…

Mark:Doug Kinsella jumps off the wall and drives an elbow right in to the chest of Big Daddy Ace…

Rhino:What a move by Doug Kinsella…

Mark:The referee is now counting Big Daddy Ace out right now…

Rhino:The referee is up to four…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is able to get up at Six and Doug Kinsella now kicks him right in the ribs as he was getting up…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now dragging him back through the crowd…

Mark:Doug Kinsella tosses Big Daddy Ace back over the guard rail…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is crawling towards the ring…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is trying to pull himself back up as Doug Kinsella comes after him… Fire Extinguisher!

Rhino:He just blew the Fire Extinguisher right in to the face of Doug Kinsella…

Mark:Doug Kinsella is blinded and Big Daddy Ace nails Doug Kinsella right in the head with the Fire Extinguisher…

Rhino:Nice attack move by The Boston Badass…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace now grabs Doug Kinsella and rams him right in to the steel ring post…

Rhino:Look Out…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is over by our announce table and is clearing things away…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is now being laid out on our table…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is now climbing up on to the top rope…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is going to be putting his body on the line as he is ready to take a big chance…

Mark:Shane McMahon is running down to the ring right now…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace seems him…

Mark:Shane McMahon slides in to the ring… Big Daddy Ace comes off the top rope… SPEAR!

Rhino:Shane McMahon has just been laid out in the center of the ring from that spear…

Mark:Doug Kinsella just rolled off our table as Shane McMahon’s involvement has given him a chance to recover…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella just grabbed something out from underneath the ring…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace turns around… Singapore Cane Shot! By Doug Kinsella who hit Big Daddy Ace in the head as he stuck it between the ropes…

Rhino:That was one hard shot from that singapore cane…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is dazed as Doug Kinsella gets back in to the ring… One More Shot from the singapore cane by Doug Kinsella…

Rhino:Shane McMahon is rolling out of the ring as he still seems to be out of it…

Mark:Doug Kinsella is now setting up Big Daddy Ace… FINAL ENCOUNTER!

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is out…

Mark:Doug Kinsella just told the referee to start counting Big Daddy Ace out…

Rhino:I dont think Big Daddy Ace is going to get up…

Mark:The referee is up to five… Six… Seven… Eight and Big Daddy Ace is back up…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella thought he was done…

Mark:Doug Kinsella is now heading up on to the top rope…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace seems dazed…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace falls back in to the ropes and Doug Kinsella gets crotched on the top rope…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is now climbing up the top rope…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace has something in mind…

Rhino:What is Big Daddy Ace going to do…

Mark:I dont know…

Rhino:INCOMING!

Mark:POWERBOMB THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE FROM THE TOP ROPE!

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace powerbomb him at least ten feet…

Mark:Doug Kinsella is laid out in front of us and is not moving…

Rhino:The referee is counting…

Mark:The referee is up to four… Five…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is still not moving…

Mark:Seven… Eight… Nine… TE…NO! Doug Kinsella gets up…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace cant believe that Doug Kinsella was actually able to get up…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is now bringing Doug Kinsella back in to the irng…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is bringing a table in to the ring…

Mark:It looks like Big Daddy Ace is ready to put Doug Kinsella away for good…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace is moments away from becoming the Number One Contender…

Mark:Doug Kinsella is crawling around the ring as he is trying to get back up on to his feet…

Rhino:The table has been setup…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is now setting up Doug Kinsella… ACE CRUSHER! THROUGH THE TABLE!

Rhino:Doug Kinsella is Out!

Mark:STEEL CHAIR SHOT!

Rhino:Shane McMahon just came in and leveled Big Daddy Ace with a Steel Chair…

Mark:Both Doug Kinsella and Big Daddy Ace are down now thanks to Shane McMahon…

Rhino:The referee is counting both men out…

Mark:The count is up to four… Five… Six…

Rhino:Both men are slowly moving…

Mark:Seven….Eight… Nine… Both Men Beat The Count!

Rhino:Who will win this match up…

Mark:We are back where we started as both men are slugging it out right now in the center of the ring…

Rhino:The bunches are slower than they were when this match up started…

Mark:Doug Kinsella gets control of the punches and now shoots him off in to the ropes… Big Daddy Ace with a reversal… SPEAR! NO! Doug Kinsella leaps over him…ROARING LARIAT! NO! Big Daddy Ace ducked underneath…

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace shoved him off in to corner…

Mark:Doug Kinsella is staggering out of the corner…

Mark:Big Daddy Ace is lining him up… SPEAR! TO SHANE MCMAHON!

Rhino:Shane McMahon just came in to the ring and took the bullet for Doug Kinsella…

Mark:Shane McMahon was just speared out of his shoes…

Rhino:Doug Kinsella has the steel chair…

Mark:CHAIR SHOT! To the Back of the Head!

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace just got busted open in the back of his head after that chair shot…

Mark:Doug Kinsella lays out the chair… FINAL ENCOUNTER! On to the Steel Chair!

Rhino:Big Daddy Ace isnt moving…

Mark:The referee is counting…

Rhino:I dont know if Big Daddy Ace can get up…

Mark:Five…Six… Seven… Eight… Big Daddy Ace is moving… Nine… Big Daddy Ace is up and then falls down… TEN! ITS OVER!

Pa Announcer:Here is your winner DOUG KINSELLA!

Rhino:Doug Kinsella wins the best of three series and is now the Number One Contender for the EWA World Heavyweight Championship…

Mark:Once again Shane McMahon’s involvement has screwed Big Daddy Ace…

Rhino:I wonder how this will go over with Big Daddy Ace…

Mark:Right now its time for our Triple Threat Ladder Match…For the EWA World Heavyweight Championship…Lets send it to the ring for the introductions…

EWA World Heavyweight Championship Triple Threat Ladder Match
Triple H(c) vs Rob Van Dam vs Subway

Pa Announcer:Tonights Main Event is Ladder Match for the EWA World Heavyweight Championship… Introducing first… The Challengers… First… From Wildwood, NJ… Weighing in at 220 Pounds… SUBWAY!

(“Hits From The Bong” plays as Subway enters the arena…)

Pa Announcer:His opponent… From Battle Creek, Michigan… Weighing in at 237 Pounds… ROB VAN DAM!

(“Walk” plays as Rob Van Dam enters the arena…)

Pa Announcer:Their Opponent… From Greenwich, Ct… Weighing in at 260 Pounds… Representing Degeneration X… The EWA World Heavyweight Champion… The Game TRIPLE H!

(“King of Kings” plays as Triple H enters the arena…)

Mark:Rob Van Dam walked in with the EWA World Championship around his waist while Triple H walked in champion… Will RVD walk out with the belt and make it truly his or can Triple H get his belt back…

Rhino:We are about to find out…

Mark:The wild card is Subway who has everything to gain and nothing to lose…

Rhino:Theres the bell…

Mark:Rob Van Dam and Subway are looking at Triple H and there they go… Both Subway and Rob Van Dam ganging up on Triple H…

Rhino:Eliminate the champion and then go after each other is a smart move…

Mark:Triple H is trying to fight back in the corner… But the two on one attack is too much… As Rob Van Dam and Subway send him off in to the farside…Triple H staggers out of the corner…Double Clothesline by Subway and Rob Van Dam…

Rhino:Triple H is staggering back up…

Mark:Rob Van Dam with a Spin Heel Kick! Knocking Triple H out of the ring…

Rhino:Now Rob Van Dam and Subway are face to face in the center of the ring…

Mark:Subway goes for a shot… Blocked by Rob Van Dam who starts to hammer Subway with a couple of forearm shots…

Rhino:Subway is coming back with forearm shots of his own…

Mark:Subway now whips Rob Van Dam in to the ropes… Reversal by Rob Van Dam… Subway comes off the ropes… Monkey Flip!

Rhino:Subway is getting back up on to his feet…

Mark:RVD nails him with a Flying Clothesline! Taking him right off of his feet…

Rhino:Triple H is back in the ring…

Mark:Triple H charges at RVD… RVD side steps Triple H and tosses him back over the top rope and to the floor goes Triple H…

Rhino:Subway is back up…

Mark:Subway charges at Rob Van Dam… RVD with a back drop and Subway goes right down on to Triple H…

Rhino:Subway and Triple H are slow to get back up on to his feet…

Mark:Rob Vam Dam now dives through the ropes and nails both Subway and Triple H…

Rhino:The Whole Fn’ Show is putting on a show so far taking it to both Triple H and Subway…

Mark:Rob Van Dam is now walking over to the ladder and is bringing it in to the ring…

Rhino:Triple H is back up…

Mark:Triple H trips the leg of Rob Van Dam as he got up on the apron…Triple H now grabs Rob Van Dam and now throws him in to the steel guard rail…

Rhino:The Game got frustrated with Rob Van Dam’s early attack and is now going on the attack…

Mark:Triple H now lines up Rob Van Dam and now drives Rob Van Dam right back in to the side of the ring…

Rhino:RVD is holding on to his back…

Mark:Triple H rolls Rob Van Dam back in to the ring…

Rhino:Subway is in the ring…

Mark:Subway with a baseball slide and knocks the ladder right in to Triple H…

Rhino:The Game is down on the ground…

Mark:Subway is now picking up Rob Van Dam and ties him up in to the tree of woe in the corner…

Rhino:This is not the position that Rob Van Dam wants to be in…

Mark:Subway picks up the ladder and now drives it right in to the midsection of Rob Van Dam… One more time Subway drives the ladder in to the midsection of RVD…

Rhino:Triple H is getting back up on the ring apron…

Mark:Subway charges and nails Triple H in the face with the ladder knocking him right off the ring apron…

Rhino:The Game is once again down on the outside of the ring…

Mark:Subway is now opening up the ladder and is beginning his climb up the ladder to take down the EWA World Heavyweight Title…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is trying to escape out of the tree of woe…

Mark:Subway is getting close to the top of the ladder… RVD is out of the tree of woe and now RVD kicks Subway right in the back of Subway…

Rhino:That slowed Subway down…

Mark:Rob Van Dam now climbs up the other side of the ladder…

Rhino:What is RVD doing?

Mark:Sunset Flip Powerbomb Off The Ladder!

Rhino:What a move by Rob Van Dam…

Mark:Rob Van Dam is now getting back in to the swing of things and is now heading up the ladder to take down the title…

Rhino:RVD is getting close…

Mark:Triple H is back in the ring and pushes the ladder over and Rob Van Dam goes crashing in to the top rope…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is spinning around…

Mark:Triple H charges and clotheslines Rob Van Dam over the top rope and to the outside goes Rob Van Dam…

Rhino:Subway is getting back up on to his feet…

Mark:Triple H now starts to hammer Subway with straight right hands… As he now whips Subway off in to the ropes… Spinebuster!

Rhino:Subway was driven right in to the mat…

Mark:Triple H now closes up the ladder and lays it out in the center of the ring…

Rhino:Subway is getting back up on to his feet slowly…

Mark:Triple H hooks up Subway… Side Walk Slam! By Subway driving him right in to the ladder…

Rhino:Subway is hurting and is holding on to his back right now…

Mark:Triple H now pulls Subway off the ladder and tosses him out of the ring…

Rhino:The Game is now setting up the ladder…

Mark:Triple H is now beginning his climb up the ladder to take down his EWA World Title Belt…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is slowly moving around on the outside of the ring…

Mark:Triple H is getting close to the title belt…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is up on the top rope…

Mark:Leaping Kick! Off the top rope by Rob Van Dam knocking Triple H off the ladder…

Rhino:Nice move by Rob Van Dam…

Mark:Triple H is getting back up… Rob Van Dam and Triple h are now trading a couple of shots back up on to his feet… Rob Van Dam whips Triple H off in to the ropes… Spin Heel Kick! No! Triple H ducks and Rob Van Dam hits the canvas…

Rhino:RVD is staggering back up on to his feet…

Mark:Triple H now picks up the ladder… Triple H charges and rams the ladder right in to Rob Van Dam…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam was caught good with that ladder…

Mark:Subway is back in the ring… Triple H turns around… Subway with a dropkick knocking the ladder back in to Triple H…

Rhino:The Game is dazed right now…

Mark:Subway is lining up Triple H… SUBLINE! NO! Triple H ducks and now spins Subway around… DDT!

Rhino:Nice counter by Triple H…

Mark:Triple H is now opening up the ladder and is setting it back up underneath the title…

Rhino:The Game is beginning his climb for the gold…

Mark:Triple H is getting close to the belt…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is climbing up the other side of the ladder…

Mark:Triple H and Rob Van Dam are trading shots on top of the ladder right now…

Rhino:Both men want to be the EWA World Heavyweight Champion…

Mark:Rob Van Dam reaches up and touches the belt and Triple H nails him in the midsection and now rams Rob Van Dam’s head in to the top of the ladder…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is dazed…

Mark:Triple H with a big right hand knocking Rob Van Dam off the ladder…

Rhino:Triple H is seconds away from retaining his EWA World Heavyweight Title…

Mark:Triple H reaches up… Subway pushes the ladder over and Triple H goes crashing in to the mat…

Rhino:Triple H was seconds away from taking home his title…

Mark:Triple H is staggering up on to his feet… Subway lines him up… SUBLINE! NO! Triple H ducks… Subway nails RVD with the Subline…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam was knocked out of the ring with that Subline…

Mark:The Game now spins Subway around… PEDIGREE!

Rhino:Subway is out…

Mark:So is Rob Van Dam…

Rhino:The Game is setting back up the ladder…

Mark:There is no one who is going to be able to stop Triple H now from retaining his EWA World Heavyweight Championship…

Rhino:The Game is climbing up the ladder…

Mark:Rob Van Dam is moving…

Rhino:Triple H is almost there…

Mark:Rob Van Dam with a Springboard and leaps right on to the ladder…

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is racing up the ladder…

Mark:Triple H reaches up and has hold of the title…

Rhino:Triple H is about to retain…

Mark:Rob Van Dam with a Big Kick! Right to the side of the head of Triple H…

Rhino:Triple H is hanging on to the ladder…

Mark:Triple H is trying to gather himself… Rob Van Dam with another kick!

Rhino:Triple H falls off the ladder…

Mark:Rob Van Dam reaches up… Rob Van Dam pulls Down The Belt! ITS OVER!

Pa Announcer:Here is your winner and NEW EWA World Heavyweight Champion ROB VAN DAM!

Rhino:Rob Van Dam is now the EWA World Heavyweight Champion…

Mark:Triple H’s streak at May-Hem continues… Now that RVD is the Heavyweight Champion of the World..

Rhino:What a match this was…

Mark:It was one hell of a match and RVD is walking out of Boston as the Champion… As we now get set for the Royal Rumble…

2009 EWA Royal Rumble
30 Men Enter, One Winner

Pa Announcer:Ladies and Gentlemen it is now time for the 2008 EWA Royal Rumble! The winner of this match will earn themselves a future EWA World Heavyweight Championship Match… Now introduce the Number One Entrant…From Pittsburgh, Pa… Weighing in at 249 Pounds… SHANE DOUGLAS!

(“Perfect Strangers” plays as Shane Douglas enters the arena…)

Pa Announcer:Entrant Number Two… From The Bowerly… RAVEN!

(“Nevermore” plays as Raven enters the arena…)

MarkThe Royal Rumble has now offically begun with two veterans of the Hardcore Wars… As Raven and Shane Douglas nailing one another with right hands…

Rhino:They are just giving it to one another…

Mark:Raven now whips Shane Douglas off in to the ropes… Raven goes for a hiptoss… Shane Douglas blocks and takes Raven off of his feet with a hiptoss of his own…

Rhino:Raven gets back up…

Mark:Shane Douglas hooks up Raven and now nails him with a Short Arm Clothesline!

Rhino:There can only be one winner in this match up and there are bound to be alot of surprises to come in this match up…

Mark:Shane Douglas is now pulling Raven up by his hair and goes to toss Raven over the top rope…

Rhino:Raven landed on the apron…

Mark:Shane Douglas goes after Raven and Raven drives his shoulder right in to the midsection of Shane Douglas…

Rhino:Shane Douglas is spinning around…

Mark:Raven is back in the ring and now kicks Shane Douglas in the midsection… Russian Leg Sweep!

Rhino:Raven is now looking to toss Shane Douglas out of the ring…

Mark:Raven is now picking up Shane Douglas and is trying to get him over the ropes…

Rhino:The crowd is getting excited…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

Rhino:Who is it going to be?

(“Reality” plays as The Miz enters the arena…)

Mark:Its The Miz!

Rhino:The Miz has been a loud mouth as of late saying that he is going to win the rumble…

Mark:The Miz is just sitting back and is letting Raven do all the work to get Shane Douglas out of the ring..

Rhino:Shane Douglas landed on the apron…

Mark:Shane Douglas rolls back in to the ring..> Raven turns around and The Miz nails him with a running high knee…

Rhino:The Miz picked his spot and took advantage of it…

Mark:The Miz is now trying to toss Raven out of the ring…

Rhino:Heres a bit of a history fact for everyone that Raven was the first ever winner of the Royal Rumble…

Mark:The Miz is now tossing Raven out of the ring…

Rhino:Raven is holding on to the ropes and trying to keep himself in to the ring…

Mark:Raven is using his ropes to keep himself in the ring and Raven lands on the apron and falls back in to the ring…

Rhino:Shane Douglas is now waiting for The Miz to turn around…

Mark:Shane Douglas just pulled a chain out of his boots and has it wrapped around his fist…

Rhino:The Miz didnt see it…

Mark:Shane Douglas charges with a big right hand… The Miz ducks and back drops Shane Douglas over the top rope…

Rhino:The Miz thought he got rid of him…

Mark:Shane Douglas landed on the apron and rolls back in to the ring… The Miz is trying to use his feet to push Shane Douglas out of the ring…

Rhino:Shane Douglas is holding on to the ropes…

Mark:How much longer can he hold on?

Rhino:I dont know… But someone else is about to come down to the ring…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Through Struggle” plays as Alan Matthews enters the arena…)

Rhino:Alan Matthews is coming in to this match up at Number Four…

Mark:Alan Matthews comes right in to the ring and goes right after Raven…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is opening up on Raven…

Mark:Alan Matthews with a full head of steam and grabs Raven by the hair and tosses him over the top rope…

Rhino:Raven Has Been Eliminated by Alan Matthews!

Mark:There went his chances of once again winning a Royal Rumble…

Rhino:Maybe next year will be a better year for Raven…

Mark:Shane Douglas just nailed The Miz with an uppercut and now scoops him up…

Rhino:It looks like The Miz is about to go…

Mark:The Miz now slides off the shoulder of Shane Douglas…

Rhino:Here comes The Miz…

Mark:The Miz with a clothesline from behind and he sends Shane Douglas over the top rope and to the floor goes The Franchise…

Rhino:Shane Douglas has been Eliminated by The Miz!

Mark:The Miz is now turning around and Alan Matthews scores with a couple of hard uppercuts right underneath the jaw knocking him right off of his feet…

Rhino:The Miz is dazed…

Mark:The Miz is staggering back up on to his feet in the corner…

Rhino:Alan Mathhews is now going after The Miz in the corner…

Mark:Alan Matthews is now going underneath The Miz and is trying to get him out of the ring…

Rhino:The Miz is hanging on to the ropes and is trying to stay in this match up…

Mark:The Miz with a hard elbow right to the side of the head of Alan Matthews…

Rhino:That elbow shot allowed The Miz to get his feet back on the ground and back in control…

Mark:The Miz now kicks Alan Matthews in the midsection and plants him with a DDT!

Rhino:The Miz at the moment is taunting the fans about how Awesome he is…

Mark:You can hear the fans letting them know they feel about him…

Rhino:The Miz is now trying to eliminate Alan Matthews…

Mark:The Miz tosses Alan Matthews over the top rope and The Miz believes he has Eliminated Alan Matthews…

Rhino:Alan Matthews landed on the apron…

Mark:Alan Matthews is back in the ring and spins The Miz around… DIRECT HIT!

Rhino:The Miz has been laid out in the center of the ring…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Rebirth” plays as Steele enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Steele!

Mark:Steele comes right in the ring and starts opening up with right hands to Alan Matthews…

Rhino:Those shots are really connecting…

Mark:Steele now whips Alan Matthews off in to the ropes… Powerslam!

Rhino:Steele is coming in as a house of fire…

Mark:The Miz has just staggered back up on to his feet…

Rhino:Steele has his eyes on him right now…

Mark:The Miz turns around and just walked right in to a big right hand from Steele… Steele now lifts him up on his shoulders…

Rhino:It looks like he is about to dump The Miz over the top rope…

Mark:The Miz is holding on to the top rope like his life depends on it…

Rhino:Well his survival in the Royal Rumble does…

Mark:The Miz is able to rake the eyes of Steele and is able to get back down on to his feet…

Rhino:Thats one way out of that move…

Mark:The Miz now drives Steele back in to the corner…

Rhino:Alan Matthews has gotten back up on to his feet…

Mark:Alan Matthews is now helping The Miz to get Steele out of the ring…

Rhino:Steele is hanging on to the ropes right now…

Mark:Steele has his legs tied up on the ropes…

Rhino:The Miz is yelling at Alan Matthews…

Mark:Alan Matthews just slapped The Miz…

Rhino:Well that partnership just went out the window…

Mark:Well it only lasted a few seconds… Alan Matthews goes behind The Miz… Release German Suplex!

Rhino:The Miz just got dropped right on the back of his head…

Mark:Alan Matthews is now grabbing The Miz and is getting ready to toss him out of the ring…

Rhino:The Miz looks to be out of it…

Mark:Alan Matthews grabs The Miz and sends him flying over the top rop and The Miz is gone…

Rhino:The Miz has been Eliminated by Alan Mathews…

Mark:Steele and Alan Matthews are now tying up in the center of the ring…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Play That Funky Music” plays as Retro Playa enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Retro Playa?

Mark:I guess so… As it looks like Lone Jobber has decided to go Old School for this rumble…

Rhino:It is Ten Years of the EWA… So why not go Old School…

Mark:Retro Playa takes his time to get in the ring… Alan Matthews has Steele backed up in to the corner and is trying to toss him out of the ring…

Rhino:Steele is hanging on…

Mark:Retro Playa is getting in to the ring and now shoves Alan Matthews right out of the way and is trying to eliminate Steele on his own…

Rhino:Steele is trying to slide back in to the ring…

Mark:Steele slides underneath the legs of Retro Playa and now spins Retro Playa around and goes for a right hand… Blocked by Retro Playa who now starts to open up on Steele…

Rhino:Retro Playa connecting with shots…

Mark:Retro Playa now kicks Steele in the midsection… Piledriver!

Rhino:Steele was dropped right on his head…

Mark:Alan Matthews charges in at Retro Playa… Retro Playa ducks the clothesline… Alan Matthews turns around… Low Card Kick!

Rhino:That kick looked good… But something seemed off with it…

Mark:What do you mean?

Rhino:It looked a little too perfect…

Mark:Well it was effective and it got the job done… As the kick has knocked out Alan Matthews…

Rhino:Retro Playa is now trying to pick up Alan Matthews and toss him over the top rope…

Mark:Retro Playa has Alan Matthews hanging over the ropes…

Rhino:Alan Matthews has control of the middle rope…

Mark:Retro Playa is trying to use all of his weight to eliminate Alan Matthews…But Alan Matthews is able to slide back in to the ring…

Rhino:That was a close call right there for Alan Matthews…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Huka Blues” plays as Sabu enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its The Homicidal…Suicidal…Genocidal…Death Defying Sabu!

Mark:Sabu comes running down to the ring with a Steel Chair in hand and throws it right in to the face of Steele…

Rhino:Steele caught that Steel Chair good…

Mark:Sabu with a big right hand knocking Retro Playa off of his feet…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is up…

Mark:Sabu with a low dropkick knocking him right off of his feet…

Rhino:Sabu is now opening up the steel chair…

Mark:Sabu scoops up and slams Retro Playa down to the mat…

Rhino:This isnt going to be good…

Mark:Sabu comes off the ropes… Triple Jump Moonsault! No! Retro Playa gets his knees up…

Rhino:Sabu got the wind knocked right out of him…

Mark:Retro Playa gets back up on to his feet… The Gimmick!

Rhino:Retro Playa is sure pulling off alot of Lone Jobber’s moves…

Mark:Well we all know Retro Playa is Lone Jobber… That secret was let out of the bag years ago…

Rhino:Very true…

Mark:Alan Matthews with an Enziguri Kick right to the back of the head of Retro Playa…

Rhino:Nice kick right there…

Mark:Steele is back up… And now hooks up Alan Matthews… Oxidation!

Rhino:Alan Matthews has been laid out by Steele…

Mark:Steele is now going after Retro Playa and is trying to make a big splash by eliminating Retro Playa from this match up…

Rhino:Retro Playa is hanging on…

Mark:The crowd seems to be getting excited…

Rhino:It looks like we are going to be seeing the next man in this match up…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Survive” plays as Taz enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Taz!

Mark:The Human Suplex Machine Taz has hit the ring and is going right after Sabu…

Rhino:Sabu and Taz had a long history in the old ECW Days and they are going at it right now here in the EWA…

Mark:Look at the two men go… Sabu with a couple of shots underneath the jaw of Taz… Taz blocks the third shot from Sabu…

Rhino:Sabu is caught in the grasp of Taz…

Mark:This isnt going to be good for Sabu…

Rhino:No its not…

Mark:T-Bone Tazplex! By Taz dropping Sabu right on his head…

Rhino:Sabu is dazed as he is trying to get back up on to his feet…

Mark:Steele charges in at Taz… Taz catches Steele… Over the Head Tazplex!

Rhino:Taz is coming out taking it right to everyone that comes his way…

Mark:Sabu is back up… Taz charges… Running Clothesline by Taz sending Sabu over the top rope…

Rhino:Sabu has been Eliminated by Taz!

Mark:From behind Alan Matthews nails with a couple of shots right across the back of the head of Taz…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is giving it to Taz at the moment…

Mark:Alan Matthews hooks up Taz… Vertical Suplex! No! Taz escapes… Tazmission!

Rhino:Taz has the Tazmission locked in and is choking the life out of Alan Matthews…

Mark:Taz has his legs wrapped around Alan Matthews as he continues to choke the life out of him…

Rhino:Retro Playa is lifting up Steele in the corner…

Mark:Taz finally lets the Tazmission go and is now trying to lift up Alan Matthews and dumping him out of the ring…

Rhino:There is no sign of life in Alan Matthews at the moment…

Mark:Taz lifts up Alan Matthews and dumps him over the ropes…

Rhino:Alan Matthews landed on the apron and rolled back in to the ring…

Mark:So I guess there still was some life left in Alan Matthew afterall Rhino…

Rhino:I guess your right… At least there was enough to keep him in this match up…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“This is Extreme” plays as Lymp Wrist enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Lymp Wrist?

Mark:Lymp Wrist has a brief run back in the early part of the decade…

Rhino:I could see why it was brief…He is lymp afterall…

Mark:Very funny…Lymp Wrist is in the ring… Taz grabs Lymp Wrist… Over the Head Belly to Belly Tazplex! Sending Lymp Wrist over the top rope and to the floor he goes…

Rhino:Lymp Wrist has been Eliminated by Taz!

Mark:Well Rhino… I guess Lymp Wrist lived up to his well… Short comings…

Rhino:Yeah… I guess he did…

Mark:Steele just elbowed Retro Playa right in the face…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is trying to recover in the corner…

Mark:Taz is now mixing it up with Steele and Retro Playa in the corner…

Rhino:Steele and Taz are trying to toss Retro Playa out of the ring…

Mark:Retro Playa is hanging on for his life right now…

Rhino:It seems like it is only going to be a matter of time before Retro Playa is eliminated from the 2009 EWA Royal Rumble…

Mark:We all know how much Lon…I mean Retro Playa wanted to win the Royal Rumble…

Rhino:It was on his to do list…

Mark:Taz and Steele push Retro Playa over the ropes but he is able to slide underneath the bottom rope and get back in to the ring…

Rhino:Taz and Steele are now trading shots…

Mark:Alan Matthews is continuing to rest in the corner…

Rhino:It seems like we are moments away from another superstar coming in to this match up…

Mark:Steele has Taz on the verge of Elimination right now…

Rhino:Taz wraps his legs around the ropes by the corner to keep himself in…

Mark:Retro Playa is now trying to help Steele out…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Party Up” plays as Whiplash enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Whiplash!

Mark:Former EWA Television Champion Whiplash has come in to the ring and is going right after Alan Matthews…

Rhino:Alan Matthews seems to be one of the targets in this match up…

Mark:Some have stated that Alan Matthews is one of the favorites to win the Royal Rumble…

Rhino:Did Vegas give odds?

Mark:No I dont think Vegas was giving odds on who will win the Royal Rumble…

Rhino:Damn… No one I could place bets with Kent…

Mark:You were placing bets with Kent?

Rhino:Um.. Yeah?

Mark:Why would you do that?

Rhino:Because hes easy…

Mark:Now who did you bet on?

Rhino:I rather not say…

Mark:Why not?

Rhino:Because I rather not…

Mark:Well who did Kent take?

Rhino:Well.. He took The Miz…

Mark:You know since he took The Miz… You probably have a good chance to win the bet…

Rhino:I do? Oh right… The Miz is gone…

Mark:And it looks like Alan Matthews is on the verge of taking Whiplash out of this match up…

Rhino:Whiplash is trying to hang on…

Mark:Retro Playa just slammed Steele down to the canvas…

Rhino:Retro Playa is heading up on to the top rope…

Mark:Steele is done… Retro Playa flies… Frog Splash! Connects!

Rhino:Nice frog splash right there… What would you rate it Mark?

Mark:I would give it like a 7…What would you give it?

Rhino:Closer to a 10 I would say…

Mark:Thats almost perfect… But we are about to get the next entrant in to the Royal Rumble…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“California Love” plays as Malice enters the arena…)

Mark:Malice… A former EWA Tag Team Champion representing the KKK…

Rhino:Its been years since we have seen any member of the KKK here in the EWA…

Mark:Malice and Retro Playa are battling right now…

Rhino:Malice is hammering Retro Playa with hard knees…

Mark:Malice is now trying to lift Retro Playa out of the ring right now…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is trying to help Malice dump Retro Playa out of the ring…

Mark:Malice and Alan Matthews are having words right now as Alan Matthews just shoved Malice…

Rhino:Malice shoved Alan Matthews back…

Mark:Alan Matthews and Malice are trading shots back and forth right now…

Rhino:They are battling back and forth right now…

Mark:Malice scoops up Alan Matthews… Running Powerslam!

Rhino:Big powerful move right there…

Mark:Steele is hooking up Whiplash…

Rhino:This isnt going to be good for Whiplash…

Mark:Steele with a Vertical Suplex and he suplexs Whiplash out of the ring…

Rhino:Whiplash Has Been Eliminated By Steele!

Mark:Retro Playa is in the corner trying to get Taz over the ropes…

Rhino:You know what is wrong with what we just witness…

Mark:What was wrong?

Rhino:Whiplash didnt pull off his most famous move…

Mark:Which is what?

Rhino:The Small Package…

Mark:You know now that you mention that… An idea just came to me…

Rhino:Whats that Mark?

Mark:The EWA is probably always in need of tag teams… Since Whiplash is the master of the Small Package… He should team up with Lymp Wrist…

Rhino:Thats really distrubing… Especially coming from you…

Mark:Sorry… I had a moment… It has now past…

Rhino:Thankfully it has… For everyone… Leave the horrible jokes to professionals…

Mark:I will… Trust me… I will…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Cant Touch This” plays as Ned Tesseract enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Ned Tesseract of Camera Chaos…

Mark:Ned Tesseract is now trying to help Retro Playa get Taz out of the ring…

Rhino:Well Ned works real close with Lone Jobber…

Mark:He is one his camera men afterall… So you expect the alliance here in this sort of match up…

Rhino:Indeed you would…

Mark:Taz with a hard kick right to the head of Ned Tesseract and now with an elbow to the face of Retro Playa to get himself back in to the ring…

Rhino:Steele just got taken down with a clothesline…

Mark:Steele is now trying to get back up on to his feet…

Rhino:Malice has him lined up…

Mark:Malice charges at Steele… Steele ducks the big boot and now Malice is straddling across the top rope…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is back up on to his feet…

Mark:Flying Shoulder Block! By Alan Matthews knocking Malice over the top rope…

Rhino:Malice has been Eliminated by Alan Matthews!

Mark:Alan Matthews picked his spot and was able to get rid of Malice…

Rhino:Steele and Alan Matthews are once again going at it…

Mark:Steele is trying to get him out of the ring…

Rhino:Taz is hooking up Ned Tesseract…

Mark:Northern Lights Tazplex!

Rhino:Really nice Suplex right there by the Human Suplex Machine…

Mark:Retro Playa spins Taz around… Ghettogree!

Rhino:Taz has been laid out in the center of the ring by the Ghettogree from the Lone Playa…

Mark:Retro Playa is trying to instruct Ned to get back up and help him get rid of Taz…

Rhino:Ned Tesseract was just laid out with a Northern Lights Tazplex… I dont know how much help he is going to be at the moment from Retro Playa…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“California Love” plays as Damu enters the arena…)

Mark:Damu is another member of the KKK…

Rhino:There were three different members of the KKK if I am not mistaken…

Mark:Damu is in the ring and comes charging at Retro Playa… Retro Playa ducks and now spins him around… THE GIMMICK!

Rhino:Retro Playa scores with the gimmick laying out Damu…

Mark:Retro Playa now picks up Damu…

Rhino:It looks like this is going to be a short appearance from Damu…

Mark:Retro Playa tosses Damu over the top rope…

Rhino:Damu Has Been Eliminated by Retro Playa!

Mark:Alan Matthews just tossed Steele through the middle ropes…

Rhino:Steele isnt eliminated as he had to go over the top rope… Not through the middle ropes…

Mark:Taz has staggered back up on to his feet in the corner…

Rhino:Taz looks to be out of it just a little bit…

Mark:Ned Tesseract is now charging in after Taz… Taz moves out of the way and Ned Tesseract goes shoulder first right in to the ring post…

Rhino:Look Out!

Mark:From behind Alan Matthews grabs Taz and tosses him over the top rope and to the floor goes the Human Suplex Machine!

Rhino:Taz has been Eliminated by Alan Matthews!

Mark:Taz had a really strong run in this match up…

Rhino:He did have a strong performance but it was not his year…

Mark:Steele is back in the ring and spins Alan Matthews around… Atomic Drop!

Rhino:Alan Matthews is now spinning around after that Atomic Drop…

Mark:Inside Out Clothesline! By Steele…

Rhino:Really hard shot right there by Steele laying out Alan Matthews…

Mark:Retro Playa is regrouping now…

Rhino:It looks like the next man in this match up is going to be announced…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Cant Touch This” plays as Jay Jixhel enters the arena…)

Mark:Well its Jay Jixhel… The other half of Camera Chaos….

Rhino:Camera Chaos were former EWA Tag Team Champions…

Mark:Yes they were… One of the darkest days in history when they won the belts…

Rhino:No it wasnt…

Mark:Yes its was… There was no one to video tape it…

Rhino:Funny Mark… Funny…

Mark:I actually did prepare for this show… Unlike alot of other people I know…

Rhino:Hey I prepare for shows…

Mark:You prepare for shows by stuffing your face…

Rhino:So?

Mark:How is that Preparing?

Rhino:Well some has to prepare the food…

Mark:All you do is eat it… You dont cook it…

Rhino:Speaking of food… Has anyone seen the Hot Dog Vender… I am getting kinda hungry…

Mark:You are always hungry…

Rhino:And whats your point?

Mark:Nothing Rhino… I have no point… Can we get back to talking about this match up…

Rhino:I guess so…

Mark:It looks like Ned and Jay are planning out some sort of strategy for this match up…

Rhino:So far all they are doing is standing guard for Retro Playa as he groups in the corner…

Mark:Who is the next man going to be…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Break it Down” plays as Scott Hall enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its The Lone Wolf Scott Hall!

Mark:Its been a while since we have seen Scott Hall…

Rhino:Everyone says they see him time from time at the local watering hole…

Mark:Well everyone knows that Scott Hall has had his problems in the past but he looks like he is ready to fight tonight…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is getting right up in his face…

Mark:Scott Hall just threw his toothpick right in the face of Alan Matthews…

Rhino:Alan Matthews wasnt happy with that…

Mark:Alan Matthews goes for a right hand… Blocked by Scott Hall…

Rhino:Scott Hall is opening up on Alan Matthews right now…

Mark:Scott Hall whips Alan Matthews off in to the ropes… Scott Hall goes for a clothesline… Alan Matthews ducks out of the way… Alan Matthews comes off the ropes… Crossbody! Caught!

Rhino:This isnt going to be good for Alan Matthews…

Mark:Fallaway Slam! By Scott Hall sending Alan Matthews across the ring…

Rhino:Watch Out!

Mark:Steele spins Scott Hall around… BESSEMER PROCESS!

Rhino:Steele with an impactful move right there taking care of Scott Hall…

Mark:Scott Hall and Steele have a history…

Rhino:That they do…

Mark:Steele right now is trying to toss Scott Hall over the top rope…

Rhino:Looks like Scott Hall is trying to hang on…

Mark:Retro Playa is still being guarded by I guess what we can say are his body guards for this match up… Ned and Jay…

Rhino:Really smart planning by Lone Jobber…

Mark:I would have to agree with you there… You need to use any allie you can in this type of match up…

Rhino:Scott Hall is almost over…

Mark:Scott Hall is trying to slide his body back in to the ring and he is able to…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is now slow to get back up on to his feet in the corner…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“I Want It All” plays as Lone Jobber enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Lone Jobber?!?

Mark:But I thought Lone Jobber was already in the ring…

Rhino:So did I…

Mark:Ned and Jay are confused…

Rhino:So is Lone Jobber…

Mark:Lone Jobber is up on the apron… Retro Playa just grabbed Ned Tesseract and tossed him at Lone Jobber…

Rhino:Lone Jobber ducked out of the way…

Mark:Ned Tesseract just hit the floor…

Rhino:Ned Tesseract just was Eliminated by Retro Playa!

Mark:Jay Jixhel turns around and looks back at Retro Playa…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is finally in the ring…

Mark:Retro Playa nails Jay Jixhel and tosses him at Lone Jobber… Lone Jobber moves out of the way and Jay Jixhel goes flying over the top rope…

Rhino:Jay Jixhel has been Eliminated by Retro Playa!

Mark:Lone Jobber and Retro Playa are now face to face in the center of the ring…

Rhino:This is a historic moment right here… Lone Jobber and Retro Playa are face to face in the center of the ring…

Mark:How is this even possible… Lone Jobber is Retro Playa…

Rhino:No idea…

Mark:Lone Jobber and Retro Playa are trading shots back and forth right now in the center of the ring…

Rhino:Look at these two men go back and forth right now…

Mark:They are really slugging it out… Lone Jobber with a hard kick to the midsection of Retro Playa…

Rhino:Retro Playa is in trouble…

Mark:Low Card Kick! No! Retro Playa ducked the kick…

Rhino:If Lone Jobber got all of that kick it would have been lights out for Retro Playa…

Mark:Retro Playa goes for a Low Card Kick of his own…

Rhino:Lone Jobber ducked that…

Mark:This is just too freaky if I must say so…

Rhino:Its like its Two Lone Jobbers…

Mark:Two Lone Jobbers… I never thought I ever would see that…

Rhino:I really dont think the EWA could actually handle Two Lone Jobbers… Case in point… When there was… Monthly Died…

Mark:Oh now that was harsher than anything else I said tonight…

Rhino:Yeah, I said I needed food…

Mark:Alan Matthews meanwhile has Scott Hall on the verge of Elimination…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is setting up Retro Playa…

Mark:THE GIMMICK! NO! Countered…

Rhino:Of course The Gimmick would be countered…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Live For The Moment” plays as Matt Hardy enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Matt Hardy!

Mark:Retro Playa has Lone Jobber set up… The Q & A!

Rhino:Did you just say Q&A?

Mark:Well thats what it looked like… As Lone Jobber has been laid out in the center of the ring by Retro Playa…

Rhino:What is Retro Playa Doing?

Mark:Retro Playa is taking off his mask…

Rhino:Oh My God!

Mark:Its William McConnell!

Rhino:William McConnell is Suicide? I mean Retro Playa!

Mark:William McConnell drops the mask on the chest of Lone Jobber and is now leaping over the top rope…

Rhino:William McConnell just Eliminated himself from this match up…

Mark:Why would William McConnell do this?

Rhino:Maybe it was to screw with Lone Jobber…

Mark:Someone has to play some Headgames around here…

Rhino:And that was some sort of Real Deal type of Headgames right there…

Mark:Matt Hardy is hooking up Steele… Twist of Fate! No! Steele counters…Bessemer Process!

Rhino:Matt Hardy has been laid out by Steele…

Mark:Lone Jobber is trying to regroup right now…

Rhino:Look out…

Mark:Alan Matthews has Scott Hall on the verge of going over the top rope…

Rhino:Can Scott Hall hang on?

Mark:It doesnt look like it as Scott Hall hits the floor hard…

Rhino:Scott Hall has Been Eliminated by Alan Matthews!

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

Rhino:Who is it going to be now?

(“Hail to the Chief” plays as Dick Bush enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Dick Bush! The Evil President!

Mark:Dick Bush after talking with President Rock Cardboard Cutout apparently has promised that he is going to win this Rumble Royal as he called it…

Rhino:Do you think he can…

Mark:Honestly?

Rhino:Yes…

Mark:Dick Bush could never get anything done…Just look at where this country is at right now…

Rhino:Dick Bush is walking right over to Lone Jobber…

Mark:Dick Bush goes to shake the hand of Lone Jobber… Lone Jobber goes for a fist bump and knocks him right in the face with a big right hand…

Rhino:That was a hard shot from Lone Jobber…

Mark:Lone Jobber grabs Dick Bush and tosses him right over the top rope…

Rhino:Dick Bush Has been Eliminated by Lone Jobber!

Mark:Lone Jobber just saluted the Evil President as he hit the floor…

Rhino:Steele and Lone Jobber are now going at it…

Mark:Alan Matthews and Steele have been in this rumble quite a long time…

Rhino:Alan Matthews came in at number four and has been in the ring for over Twenty Eight Minutes…

Mark:Steele came in at number five and has been over Twenty Six Minutes…

Rhino:Steele is about to put Lone Jobber out of the ring…

Mark:Can El Presidente hold on?

Rhino:What is Lone Jobber doing?

Mark:Lone Jobber grabs the head of Steele by the legs and scores with a Headscissors taking Steele over the top rope…

Rhino:Steele hit the floor…

Mark:Looks like Steele’s Twenty Six minute run is over…

Rhino:Steele Has Been Eliminated by Lone Jobber!

Mark:He had a nice little run in this match up…

Rhino:The crowd is counting again…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Hall of Illusion” plays as Troy “The Rampage” Joseph enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Rampage!

Mark:Troy Joseph comes right in to the ring and is opening up on Lone Jobber…

Rhino:Troy Joseph and Lone Jobber had a hard fought battle last week over the EWA Total Impact Championship…

Mark:Lone Jobber was able to keep the EWA Total Impact Championship…

Rhino:We need to remember if anyone is able to toss Lone Jobber out of the ring… They will earn a shot at the EWA Total Impact Championship… Just by eliminating Lone Jobber…

Mark:Troy “The Rampage” Joseph has stated that he is going to attempt to get rid of Lone Jobber…

Rhino:He is going right for it right now…

Mark:Lone Jobber is holding on as best as he can right now…

Rhino:Matt Hardy and Alan Matthews are battling right now in the corner…

Mark:Matt Hardy almost has Alan Matthews over the ropes…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is trying to survive at this point…

Mark:Lone Jobber with a thumb to the eye of Troy “The Rampage” Joseph so he was able to escape and get back in to the ring…

Rhino:For a moment there it looked as though Lone Jobber was going to be Eliminated from this match up…

Mark:Lone Jobber is hooking up Troy “The Rampage” Joseph… DDT! No! Reverse Neckbreaker! By Troy Joseph…

Rhino:Nice counter right there…

Mark:Big Hard Elbow! By Alan Matthews right to the side of the head of Matt Hardy…

Rhino:Alan Matthews has his feet back down on the ground where they belong…

Mark:This is one of the biggest matches in the year for the EWA with alot at stake Rhino…

Rhino:The winner gets a shot at the EWA World Heavyweight Championship that they can cash in at any time…

Mark:You remember back when Shawn Michaels won the Royal Rumble…

Rhino:Yes I do…

Mark:Shawn Michaels didnt cash that contract in until Glory last year… Where he changed the Main Event from Lone Jobber vs William McConnell to a Triple Threat Match…

Rhino:Wasnt that the match where Lone Jobber lost both of the falls…

Mark:Yes it was…

Rhino:Thought so…

Mark:Someone could cash this in next month and change Doug Kinsella and Rob Van Dam to a Triple Threat Match…

Rhino:Yes they could…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Crank It Up” plays as Big Show enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its The Big Show!

Mark:The Big Show is the biggest man in this match up…

Rhino:So far…

Mark:Right… The Big Show is the Biggest Man in this match up so far… As The Big Show gets in the ring and is telling everyone to bring it on…

Rhino:Matt Hardy goes after Big Show…

Mark:Big Show kicks him in the midsection and now scores with a Headbutt!

Rhino:Here comes Troy Joseph…

Mark:Troy Joseph with hard right hands to the Big Show…

Rhino:He is really connecting…

Mark:The Big Show now nails Troy “The Rampage” Joseph in the midsection with a hard knee and follows it up with another headbutt…

Rhino:Lone Jobber and Alan Matthews are looking at one another…

Mark:Big Show tells them both to bring it on… Lone Jobber and Alan Matthews score with right hands to The Big Show…

Rhino:They are really working together at the moment…

Mark:Lone Jobber and Alan Matthews both kick Big Show in the midsection and are now setting him up…

Rhino:They couldnt? Could they?

Mark:Double Suplex! No! Big Show Blocks… Double Suplex! By The Big Show to Both Alan Matthews and Lone Jobber…

Rhino:What a move by The Big Show!

Mark:The Big Show is standing tall in the center of the ring…

Rhino:The Big Show has torn through everyone in this match up…

Mark:Matt Hardy has staggered back up on to his feet in the corne.r..

Rhino:Here comes The Big Show…

Mark:Big Splash! By The Big Show crushing Matt Hardy in the corner…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Is Cookin” plays as The Rock enters the arena…)

Rhino:Number Twenty One is The Rock!

Mark:The Rock is in the ring and is getting right up in the face of The Big Show…

Rhino:The Rock and The Big Show are trading shots back and forth…

Mark:It looks like The Rock has the advantage as he scores with right hands backing The Big Show up in to the ropes… The Rock with an irish whip… Reversal by The Big Show… Big Boot!

Rhino:So much for the momentum The Rock was buidling…

Mark:Troy Joseph and Alan Matthews both charge up from behind on The Big Show and have him by the ropes…

Rhino:The Big Show is straddling the ropes right now…

Mark:Lone Jobber is now trying to help get the Big Show out of the ring…

Rhino:Big Show is trying to fight off three men right now…

Mark:Big Show is so big… I dont know if even those three can get him out of the ring…

Rhino:Big Show continues to fight back…

Mark:The Rock starts to walk towards the Big Show and now turns around…

Rhino:What is The Rock doing?

Mark:The Rock grabs Matt Hardy by the head and just tossed him out of the ring…

Rhino:Matt Hardy has been Eliminated by The Rock!

Mark:So instead of helping Troy Joseph, Alan Matthews and Lone Jobber… The Rock just tosses Matt Hardy out of the ring…

Rhino:That could be a smart move on The Rock’s part…

Mark:Why do you say that?

Rhino:Well why would you waste energy trying to get rid of The Big Show… Save your energy and get rid of the weaker man…

Mark:Well I do see your point right there…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Real American” plays as Hulk Hogan enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Hulk Hogan!

Mark:The Hulkster has arrived and he is going right for it…

Rhino:Hulk Hogan is the fresh man in this match up…

Mark:Hulk Hogan with a big head of steam pushes the pile and The Big Show has been tossed over the top rope…

Rhino:It took Troy Joseph, Lone Jobber, Alan Matthews and Hulk Hogan to Eliminate The Big Show…

Mark:Well he is the Big Show afterall…

Rhino:The Rock is now getting right up in the face of Hulk Hogan…

Mark:Listen to the crowd response right now… They wany these two men to go at it against one another…

Rhino:The Rock goes for the first shot…

Mark:The Rock is just hammering Hulk Hogan with right hands and knocks him off of his feet…

Rhino:The Rock is now putting the boots to Hogan…

Mark:The boots arent having an effect on Hulk Hogan…

Rhino:The Hulkster is hulking right up…

Mark:The Rock goes for a right hand… Blocked by Hulk Hogan… Big right hands from Hulk Hogan…

Rhino:Listen to the crowd get behind Hulk Hogan right now…

Mark:Hulk Hogan whips The Rock off in to the ropes… Big Boot!

Rhino:The Hulkster is feeling it right now…

Mark:Hulk Hogan has this crowd in a frenzy right now…

Rhino:Here it comes…

Mark:Hulk Hogan comes off the ropes… Leg..No! Lone Jobber from behind grabs Hulk Hogan behind and tosses Hulk Hogan over the top rope…

Rhino:Hulk Hogan has been Eliminated by Lone Jobber!

Mark:Lone Jobber just very smartly picked his spot and eliminated the Hulkster…

Rhino:I dont think the fans are too happy with Lone Jobber after that…

Mark:Alan Matthews is on the verge of going over right now as Troy Joseph has him up over the ropes…

Rhino:Will Alan Matthews be able to hang on?

Mark:You have to wonder how much more he has left in the tank…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“American Nightmare” plays as Jeremy Johnson enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its The Impact Player Jeremy Johsnon…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson has made it very clear of his intensions…

Rhino:That he did…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson is going right for Lone Jobber and that is what he promised… Jeremy Johnson with hard shots right to Lone Jobber…

Rhino:Look at The Impact Player go…

Mark:Its been a couple of years since Jeremy Johnson has been in a ring… But he looks as good as ever…

Rhino:Yes he does…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson lifts up Lone Jobber… Front Face Suplex! Dropping Lone Jobber face first in to the canvas…

Rhino:Look out!

Mark:From behind Troy “The Rampage” Joseph takes Jeremy Johnson down with a running Bulldog!

Rhino:Jeremy Johnson didnt see that coming…

Mark:Alan Matthews is now coming out of the corner… Running Clothesline! No! Troy Joseph ducks out of the way… RUNNING RAMPAGE RUFFLE!

Rhino:Alan Matthews has been laid out in the center of the ring…

Mark:Can Troy Joseph finally get rid of Alan Matthews…

Rhino:I think he could right here and now…

Mark:Troy “The Rampage” Joseph lifts him up and is hanging him over the top rope…

Rhino:Alan Matthews is trying to hang on…

Mark:Alan Matthews looks like he is losing his grip…

Rhino:He has been in the ring longer than anyone in this match up…

Mark:One more hard push… Alan Matthews loses his grip but is able to slide back in to the ring…

Rhino:So very close was Alan Matthews from going over the top rope…

Mark:He was barely able to hang on…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is trying to get rid of Jeremy Johnson…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Toccata” plays as Gorch Fock enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Gorch Fock!

Mark:Gorch Fock is coming right down to the ring and is trying to help Lone Jobber get rid of Jeremy Johnson…

Rhino:They are trying to get the almost three hundred pounder over the top rope…

Mark:That is no easy task…

Rhino:No it is not…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson with elbows to both Lone Jobber and Gorch Fock as he is now able to get his feet back on the ground and go back to work…

Rhino:Jeremy Johnson is backing Lone Jobber up in to the corner…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson is just hammering the EWA Total Impact Champion with hard shots right to the ribs…

Rhino:It is just one shot after another…Right to the ribs of Lone Jobber…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson is setting up Lone Jobber… TOTAL IMPACT! NO! Lone Jobber is able to escape…

Rhino:Watch out…

Mark:THE GIMMICK! By Lone Jobber

Rhino:Nice escape and counter by Lone Jobber laying out The Impact Player Jeremy Johnson…

Mark:Lone Jobber is now once again trying to toss Jeremy Johnson out of the ring…

Rhino:Gorch Fock has Troy Joseph on the ropes right now…

Mark:Gorch Fock is one interesting character to say the least…

Rhino:He really is…

Mark:Gorch Fock right now has Troy Joseph almost over… But Troy Joseph slides back in to the ring…

Rhino:Close call right there…

Mark:Troy Joseph is now coming back with a couple of shots to Gorch Fock…

Rhino:The fans are waiting to find out who Number 25 is going to be in this match up…

Mark:I think we are now moments away from finding out who it is going to be…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Boy Toy” plays in the arena…)

Rhino:It couldnt be?

Mark:Are you kidding me?

Rhino:Thats Shawn Michaels music alright…

Mark:Look on the face of Lone Jobber…

Rhino:He is in complete shock…

Mark:Everyone in this arena is… As the last time everyone saw Shawn Michaels he was in a wheel chair…

Rhino:All reports were saying that Shawn Michaels was never going to wrestle again…

Mark:The fans are waiting…

Rhino:Oh my…

Mark:Its Blake Bennit!

Rhino:The Sexy Boy Blake Bennit is mocking Shawn Michaels…

Mark:I cant believe it…

Rhino:Thats a low shot right there mocking Shawn Michaels…

Mark:Lone Jobber has started to laugh…

Rhino:I think he really enjoyed that from Blake Bennit…

Mark:Everyone knows the history between Shawn Michaels and Blake Bennit from years ago…

Rhino:They had a long battle over the EWA World Heavyweight Championship…

Mark:Lone Jobber is going right up to Blake Bennit and is patting him right on the back for a job well done…

Rhino:I guess Lone Jobber did enjoy that…

Mark:Lone Jobber now grabs Blake Bennit and tosses him over the ropes…

Rhino:Blake Bennit skins the cat back in to the ring…

Mark:Clothesline! By Troy Joseph knocking Blake Bennit out of the ring…

Rhino:Troy Joseph Has Eliminated Blake Bennit!

Mark:Lone Jobber thought he did it but it was Troy Joseph who was able to eliminate Blake Bennit…

Rhino:Better luck next year Blake…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Wreck” plays as Mick Foley enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Mick Foley!

Mark:The Hardcore Legend has arrived and is looking for some Total Nonstop Action tonight.. As Mick Foley goes right after Gorch Fock…

Rhino:Gorch Fock and Mick Foley are going back and forth right now…

Mark:Gorch Fock with a kick to the midsection of Mick Foley… Headscissors! Takeover by Gorch Fock…

Rhino:Mick Foley is getting back up on to his feet in the corner…

Mark:Gorch Fock climbs up the corner and now starts to hammer Mick Foley with right hands…

Rhino:Gorch Fock is unloading on Mick Foley…

Mark:Gorch Fock with his Tenth Punch to Mick Foley…

Rhino:Mick Foley is staggering out of the corner…

Mark:Double Arm DDT! By Gorch Fock driving Mick Foley right in to the corner…

Rhino:Jeremy Johnson just grabbed Lone Jobber and tossed him right over the top rope…

Mark:Lone Jobber landed on the apron and rolls back in to the ring…

Rhino:That was a close call for Lone Jobber right there…

Mark:Alan Matthews has found a nice little spot in the corner right now as he is trying rest…

Rhino:He really has given it his all in this match up…

Mark:Troy Joseph and Jeremy Johnson are fighting right now…

Rhino:They arent holding back…

Mark:Troy Joseph goes for a right hand… Ducked by Jeremy Johnson… Jeremy Johnson with a kick to the midsection… Powerbomb!

Rhino:Jeremy Johnson has laid him out in the middle of the ring…

Mark:The Rock is now trying to get Lone Jobber over the top rope…

Rhino:The Rock is trying to pick his spot and is doing so…

Mark:Lone Jobber is trying to hold on…

Rhino:If The Rock can get Lone Jobber over the top rope he will have a shot at the EWA Total Impact Championship…

Mark:The Rock and Lone Jobber met in the Unification Match a couple of weeks agon when the EWA Total Impact Championship was unified with the EWA Television Championship…

Rhino:Lone Jobber looks to be on the verge of going over…

Mark:Lone Jobber slides back in to the ring at the last second…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Pop and Circumstance” plays Macho Man Randy Savage enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its The Macho Man!

Mark:Ohhh Yeah!

Rhino:Its been a long time since anyone has seen Macho Man…

Mark:Well he has a DVD out… That you probably order at a shop… Like Shop.eWazone.com…

Rhino:We are shameless self promoting whores here in the EWA arent we?

Mark:We are wild about talking about our plugs…

Rhino:Yes we are… Especially on Radio…

Mark:Anyway… Macho Man is in the ring and is nailing The Rock with a couple of right hands…

Rhino:Macho is coming out firing…

Mark:Macho Man whips The Rock off in to the ropes… Big Clothesline!

Rhino:The Macho Man has laid out The Rock…

Mark:Macho Man Randy Savage is heading up on to the top rope…

Rhino:Could it be?

Mark:Flying Elbow Drop! Connects right down on to The Rock…

Rhino:Big time elbow drop by Macho Man…

Mark:Alan Matthews is back up and grabs Macho Man by the tights and now tosses him over the top rope…

Rhino:Macho Man has Been Eliminated by Alan Matthews!

Rhino:Alan Matthews just picked his spot perfectly and took out Randy Savage…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson has Mick Foley on the verge of being thrown out of the ring…

Rhino:It looks like Jeremy Johnson needs one more big push and he will have Mick Foley out of the ring…

Mark:The Hardcore Legend is trying to hang on..

Rhino:I dont think he can hang on much longer…

Mark:Gorch Fock has Lone Jobber on the ropes right now…

Rhino:Look Out!

Mark:Mick Foley has been dumped over the top rope by Jeremy Johnson…

Rhino:Mick Foley Has Been Eliminated by Jeremy Johnson!

Mark:Who will win the 2009 Royal Rumble… As we still have three more people to go…

Rhino:Here comes number 28…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“What Does Everybody Want” plays as Al Snow enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Al Snow!

Mark:Al Snow is heading right in to the ring and is going right for Troy Joseph…

Rhino:Al Snow is hammering Troy Joseph…

Mark:Al Snow hooks up Troy Joseph and takes him over with a Vertical Suplex!

Rhino:Troy Joseph is getting back up on to his feet in the corner…

Mark:Gorch Fock has Lone Jobber almost out of the ring…

Rhino:The Rock and Alan Matthews are battling right now…

Mark:Lone Jobber gets back in… But I dont know if I can say the same thing for Alan Matthews…

Rhino:The Rock almost has him out of the ring…

Mark:Alan Matthews finds a way to slide back in to the ring before his feet touched the ground…

Rhino:So very close right there as Alan Matthews gets back in to the ring…

Mark:Gorch Fock and Al Snow are going at it… Al Snow ducks shot from Gorch Fock…

Rhino:Al Snow is setting up Gorch Fock…

Mark:Snow Plow!

Rhino:Gorch Fock could be out of it right now..

Mark:Al Snow is trying to lift up Gorch Fock and dump him over the top rope…

Mark:The Rock has Lone Jobber lined up right now…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is spinning around…

Mark:Rock Bottom! By The Rock laying Lone Jobber out in the center of the ring…

Rhino:We could be seeing the end of the road for El Presidente after that Rock Bottom…

Mark:Look Out! Jeremy Johnson spins The Rock around… TOTAL IMPACT!

Rhino:The Rock has been laid out…

Mark:Both Lone Jobber and The Rock are down in the center of the ring…

Rhino:Gorch Fock is holding on to everything he can right about now…

Mark:Yeah Gorch Fock isnt in the best of position right now…

Rhino:His body is all kinds of twisted around the ropes…

Mark:Here comes Number 29!

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Diesel Blues” plays as Kevin Nash enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Kevin Nash!

Mark:Big Daddy Cool Kevin Nash is making his way down to the ring…

Rhino:And it looks like Kevin Nash means business…

Mark:Kevin Nash is in the ring and Jeremy Johnson goes right after the Big Seven Footer…

Rhino:Look at these two go back and forth trading shots back and forth…

Mark:Kevin Nash has just been rocked by a couple of shots… Jeremy Johnson charges in… Big Boot!

Rhino:Thats a staggering shot right there from Big Sexy…

Mark:Troy Joseph is on the verge of putting Lone Jobber out of this match up once and for good…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is trying to get back in to the ring…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson has staggered back up on to his feet…

Rhino:Kevin Nash has him lined up…

Mark:Jackknife Powerbomb! By Kevin Nash dropping Jeremy Johnson out in the center of the ring…

Rhino:Gorch Fock just slid back in to the ring…

Mark:Lone Jobber has gotten back in to the ring as well…

Rhino:Kevin Nash is now trying to eliminate Jeremy Johnson…

Mark:The Impact Player looks to be out of it…

Rhino:Kevin Nash has the impact player almost out of the ring…

Mark:Troy Joseph from behind grabs Gorch Fock by the tights and tosses him over the top rope…

Rhino:Gorch Fock has been Eliminated by Troy “The Rampage” Joseph!

Mark:It sounds like we are about to find out who number thirty is…

Crowd:10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1!

(“Sober” plays as Vertigo enters the arena…)

Rhino:Its Vertigo!

Mark:The Godfather has come to fight tonight in the Royal Rumble…

Rhino:Jeremy Johnson just slid back in to the ring…

Mark:Vertigo and The Rock are now trading shots back and forth…

Rhino:The Rock was finally able to recover and is really peppering those shots in on Vertigo…

Mark:Vertigo is firing back with shots of his own… As The Rock now gets sent off in to the ropes… Flying Forearm Shot! By Vertigo taking The Rock off of his feet…

Rhino:Alan Matthews just gave a low blow to Kevin Nash…

Mark:Low Card Kick! By El Presidente Lone Jobber right to Kevin Nash knocking him over the top rope and to the floor…

Rhino:Kevin Nash Has Been Eliminated thanks to Lone Jobber!

Mark:Alan Matthews scored the low blow and Lone Jobber took advantage with the Low Card kick…

Rhino:Al Snow is now attacking Vertigo…

Mark:Vertigo is being backed up in to the corner by Al Snow…

Rhino:Al Snow is just opening up on him right now…

Mark:Al Snow with an irish whip… Reversal by Vertigo… Al Snow comes staggering out of the corner… Vertigo goes for a clothesline… Al Snow ducks out of the way…

Rhino:Al Snow is firing back on Vertigo…

Mark:Al Snow is now trying to dump Vertigo out of the ring…

Rhino:It looks like Vertigo is about to be eliminated…

Mark:Watch Out! Jeremy Johnson with a big head of steam… As he dumps both Vertigo and Al Snow out of the ring…

Rhino:Al Snow and Vertigo Have Been Eliminated by Jeremy Johnson!

Mark:We are down to the final five men in this match up…

Rhino:Troy Joseph and The Rock are battling…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson and Alan Matthews are now going at one another…

Rhino:What is Lone Jobber going to do?

Mark:The Rock goes for a clothesline on Troy Joseph.. Troy Joseph ducks… Back Body Drop!

Rhino:The Rock Has Been Eliminated by Troy Joseph!

Mark:We are down to four…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is lining up Troy Joseph…

Mark:Troy Joseph turns around… LOW CARD KICK! NO! Troy Joseph ducks the kick and now knocks him back in to the ropes…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is in trouble…

Mark:RUNNING RAMPAGE RUFFLE! NO! Lone Jobber pulls down the top rope and Troy Joseph goes flying over the top rope…

Rhino:Troy Joseph Has Been Eliminated by Lone Jobber!

Mark:Troy Joseph’s run has ended…Jeremy Johnson charges at Lone Jobber… Running Clothesline!

Rhino:Lone Jobber is Gone!

Mark:Jeremy Johnson has taken out Lone Jobber… No! Lone Jobber held on…

Rhino:How in the hell did he do that…

Mark:Jeremy Johnson turns around… Alan Matthews lifts up Jeremy Johnson! DEADLY DRIVER! NO! Jeremy Johnson escapes and now shoves Alan Matthews in to the ropes…

Rhino:Here comes Jeremy Johnson…

Mark:Running Clothesline! No! Alan Matthews ducks and back drops Jeremy Johnson over the top rope…

Rhino:Jeremy Johnson has Been Eliminated by Alan Matthews!

Mark:We are now down to two…

Rhino:Lone Jobber and Alan Matthews…

Mark:Both men are now slugging it out here in the center of the irng…

Rhino:Lone Jobber has been in this match up over thirty minutes…

Mark:Alan Matthews has lasted almost 55 minutes already…

Rhino:How much do both men have left in the tank…

Mark:Lone Jobber with a kick… LOW CARD KICK! NO! Alan Matthews ducks…

Rhino:Alan Matthews has Lone Jobber up on his shoulders…

Mark:DEADLY DRIVER OVER THE TOP ROPE!

Rhino:Thats It!

Mark:Lone Jobber its Out! LONE JOBBER HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!

Rhino:No he isnt!

Mark:Is that Pierre?

Rhino:Yes it is…

Mark:Lone Jobber landed on Pierre and is now standing on him…

Rhino:Alan Matthews thinks he has won…

Mark:Lone Jobber leaps back in to the ring… LOW CARD KICK!

Rhino:Alan Matthews is dazed…

Mark:Running Clothesline Over the Top Rope! Alan Matthews Hits The Floor! ITS OVER!

Pa Announcer:Here is your winner LONE JOBBER!

Rhino:Lone Jobber has won the 2009 EWA Royal Rumble!

Mark:What a Royal Rumble…

Rhino:This was very exciting…

Mark:Lone Jobber is not only the EWA Total Impact Champion… He now has a contract that he can cash in at any time to fight for the EWA World Heavyweight Championship…

Rhino:Lone Jobber is on quite a roll..

Mark:How much longer can it continue? Rob Van Dam is the new EWA World Champion… Lone Jobber has won the Royal Rumble…What a Night! For Rhino… Im Mark… Good Night Everyone!

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